the depression sets in...

[YesLife4Me]

Help!  I can't pull myself out of this dark cloud that has settled over me!  I want to cry, feel sorry for myself and start blaming everyone else for my blues.  What the heck?  Im heading towards day 11 and the past couple days have been diffficult.... I know I did this to myself...nobody to blame but me.  I just want to escape this feeling so badly!  

[ufindme2008]

The best thing you can do is push yourself daily.  No matter how depressed and or anxious you are, "this too shall pass."  Remember PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome?)  That may have kicked in.  I dont know your DOC or how long youve been using but from my own experience, depression is bad, but it can be managed until it passes.  Keep yourself occupied, be around encouraging people, attend AA/NA, take vitamins, eat right, get out of the house daily...and most importantly PRAY!!!  I pray that you hang in there cuz it does get better.

Ellen

[weaver71]

You have come so far. I wish I could say that I didn't ever feel that way anymore, but we both know better than that. I feel good again today, and you are part of that. Remember how important you are to us and surely others, thank you for your support. I started focusing on what I have to look forward to and how much progress I have made, and I faked it till I felt it. You are winning each and every day. Nice work.

[buddycrunch]

I'm as up and down as a bug riding inside a tire on a mountain bike, whole days and much longer periods are low or high, then within each day is serveral hills and valleys, then you got the bumps!  The bumps turn life into living moment by moment.

3rd time I've been on here today
since some of you got up and around i did too.
went downtown and wrote a hot check for cigs.
returned to my shop full of money making customer's projects, without enough motivation to do them.

Thinking i should start another self inflicted torture ......  quit these dang cigs while i'm so involved on this website.  

That "Letter From My Addiction" that connie posted is really hitting me hard and sinking in.   ADDICTION WANTS TO DESTROY ME ANYWAY IT CAN, EVEN ANY PART OF ME, MY LIFE, MY FAMILY, MY INCOME, MY HEALTH.  It just simply wants whatever it can get from me!  

[155free]

Hey Don mind me for being nosy.. hehe but this screen name sounds much better ain't ?no matter what, life is in your hand, you need your finger to hold it, your palm to grab whole of it,,

All the best
Cherie

[YesLife4Me]

Thank you for the angelic thoughts Cherie and for words of encouragement Ron.  

[YesLife4Me]

Yeah, I know how you feel.  Such a curse...no money when using and no money when I quit.  Makes one feel trapped.   Trying to make the best I can with what I got for now.  

[Norco1947]

I love the fake it till you make it . Some days we must fight harder then other days . But the good days will keep comeing more & more often. It will get better soon ... Ron

[dede2121]

Must be a bad day. I cant hardly get out of bed myself. Its rainy and blah and no money to get out if I wanted to. Sigh

[155free]

Hey, there's life for you! A new beginning of a clean new life ahead! Trust me and yourself Ya, smiles be with you...  
If I am am angel, I will cast aways those tiny winny little demons devil in front of you, and replace with lots of flowers, loves and angels!!!  Haha, though I can't but you can fantasy and conquer the battle alright? I know you can cause you have done it for 11huge days.. don't let that few days beats you up cause the 12-13-14-15and so and so will be so so so much more better! This I promise you, you have faith and trust, you will have successful achievement..  

World and life are so wonderful ahead..  
A little encouragement from me sincerely to you..  
May loves be with you, fight fight fight!!!  

Cherie

[YesLife4Me]

Oh...and I hear ya on the laundry...ick.  got some of that to do as well.  

[YesLife4Me]

Good idea.  Perhaps I will take him to mickey d's and let him run and play.  He has soooo much energy, it is amazing!  Plus it will be good for me to get out.  Posting to help others helps me get my mind off myself.  Your posts are inspiring as well.  :)  now let's tackle this day!!

[HappyDays2Come]

Hey being dressed is definitely good!! I think I'm going to do some laundry (ugh, folding: my favorite *sarcasm*) and then go with my husband to let our daughter go jump (ever taken your grandson to one of the inside jumping places or is he still too little? You know what? I wasn't going to go and I was going to go lay on the couch. Thanks to you I'm getting up and GOING. Wow, you and this board are awesome.

Oh by the way, you have been motivating everyone and commenting on all posts trying to help others and that is amazing. You have a way with words and are probably helping so many people.

[YesLife4Me]

Your post do help me tremendously!!  Thank you Happy.  I like your outlook.  Fake it til I make it...can do that.  Even if it just for today.  Your posts keep me going too!

[HappyDays2Come]

Haven't you heard, you've got to "Fake it til you make it." Hahah, wow doesn't that make sense now?? In the beginning it's just the physical but everyone warns that the mental will set in and that's what gets everyone to "just take one pill." Not us! We've got to fake it til we make it and we can do this! You're doing great and you're going to be the best grandma to your grandson. Just keep faking it and one day you're going to wake up and be enjoying life again!

[YesLife4Me]

Ok..if you can do it, then so can I!   Im dressed...that's a start...lol.

[YesLife4Me]

I've tried forcing myself to do things...feels like im just going through the motions.  No interest..and what few things I think of doing seems overwhelming.   Gonna watch my grandson for a few hours...hopefully that helps.  Then back to a structured work week.  Can't handle having nothing to do.  Not even sure what I would want to do if I even felt like it.  This blasted drug took me away and now I feel like a shell.  Albeit a clean one, but lost qnd lonely.   :(

[HappyDays2Come]

UGH me too! I'm on my bed now and know that I have to get up and do something...anything. Just know that it's only temporary. I find myself freaking myself out sayin, "OMGosh, is this permanent?" I know that it's not so I try to pump myself up. It's only our minds playing tricks on us. Reading your post is really motivating me to get up and go do something, so thank you for helping me (probably without even realizing it:). Haha! Please don't feel sorry for yourself or blaming anyone...we should be soooo proud of ourselves for taking our lives back!! That's the way to think! We are going to win the battle and let's remember that we will no longer have to live our lives surrounded around pill counting, pill chasing, and having a pill to do anything! We can do this. We're still early in but we can definitely do this and come out even better and wiser than before. So come on my friend and get up...I'm about to right now. Thank you for inspiring me.