please tell me this will get better

[mommytobrae]

I tried to follow a taper plan that gnarly was so nice to help me with but found myself going back up in my dose and not tapering down, I jumped off at 40mgs of methadone. Today is day 2 with no methadone and im feeling so depressed already, like crying all the time, my body hurts soooo bad, im getting the cold sweats and chills and feel like im in a fog from the atian i am taking to try to help sleep. How many more day of this!!! I really wann do this this time! I have been strong this far as my dealer has methadone so at anytime i could get some but i want to have a clean life that is not dependant upon pills!!! When is this gonna get better? I took today off from work and am off the next 2 days after today, You think i will be able to go to work friday?

[wishful1]

i am going through the exact same thing as u! but norcos, or whatever i can get my hands on. we both wanna be clean, but have to work and have dealers that are easy to get. so what do we do? its so scary. i have tapered down a little but as soon as i pick up a lil more i end up binging, i dont know what to do, mentally i know we are ready but physically we r screwed. maybe we can help each other thru this....what do i do.....i dont know if i should just quit cold turkey cuz when i tell myself that i wanna taper down, i always end up taking more. its so hard. ahhh!!! i just think if i take a week off work i can do it? i dont know

[mommytobrae]

thank you gnarly, and everyone! im so happy that i found this site. I think i am going to give my car keys to the hubby tonite since im off for the next 2 days... that way i wont even be tempted to think about going by my dealers house. Is this stupid to do? I mean does this mean i dont want to be sober? If someone wanted to be clean they would just get thru the wd part and not have problems wanting to go get more pills right?

[gnarly_1]

HI im glad to see you posting it will help to have the support of others ..YOU CAN DO THIS
its just going to take some time to feel better the physical aspects of it took me a good 7 days to get past with some lingering effects hanging around for 2 weeks but its the "mental mind screw" that takes the work..you sorta git hit with an energy crash that makes everything seam harder ...try and stay bizzy my wife made sure I got out of the house daily even if it was just for a walk around the block it helps ..take a long hot bath
it will help with a lot of the symptoms and relax you...as soon as your up to it plug into some aftercare it will help with the mental challenges and take it 1 day at a time..YOU WILL GET THEW THIS but there are no short cuts methadone is no fun detoxing off of
but it is doable it just takes some perseverance ..you have to push past the pain and keep the prize in sight your pill free now just let it run its course and things will start to get better..you will notice improvements weekly then monthly but slowly you will come around...and it is so so worth it in the end good luck and God bless.....Gnarly    

[mommytobrae]

I dont believe this! my dealer just called and said he was close to where i live did i want him to stop by, and i actually said no!!! omg omg im so proud of that! Normally im not this strong especially on day 2 and 3. Maybe its the ativan helping out but whatever it is, i said no!!!! just gotta get thru tonight now which is super hard for me

[stilltrying1965]

As TH and RB has said methadone is one of the hardest drugs to come of, but you are doing a great job It will get better. I can tell you this i was addicted to heroin for 13 lost and lonly years when i came of cold turkey every day i was clean made me feel better about myself. And this will happen to you aswell coz every day you stay clean you will feel better about yourself.One day at a time my friend and you will reap the rewards of your clean life. This will not last forever stay strong. I wish you the very best of luck ,,,,James

[LeaAnn807]

Honey, I have two girls, and I love them more than drugs....bottom line!  I got off of them for myself, but I can't be a decent mommy any other way!  

You need to keep telling yourself that you want that natural energy and that life is better when you don't take drugs!

Its going to be ok.  Your little one needs a clean and sober mom, and you deserve it too!

Keep posting!  Don't take a pill today!  That is the only goal you have to have right now!!!

[mommytobrae]

I hate this ******* ****!!!! I want to be clean again not just for myself but for my little girl too. I just had 2 years clean and my ******* sister who knows what i have been thru offered my a methadone! I only needed one of those to get me hooked. I know what its like to have that natural energy and be able to function without a pill, life off of drugs is so much better! So why the hell do i do this?????

[refusingbondage]

Methadone is probably the worst to detox from, BUT inevitably IT WILL GET BETTER.  If you can stick with it, remember that.   It wont, it can',t last forever.  Good luck and God bless.

[LeaAnn807]

Hi!  Methadone has such a long half life that it makes the WDs last longer.  I would guess about a week of the worst part and gradually getting better after that!

The only thing you can do is NOT give up!  You can do this!