Lost but looking for me again...

[littlegirlinbigworld]

Ok so here I go...Ive been lurking for months!  Even feel like I know many of yall! (yes, I'm from the south...lol). I am starting day 1 without any Norco!  Been taking up to 20 a day for the past 6 months. I have been taking the demon pills for about 2 years!  I can't do this anymore. I started with real pain from my husband (now exhusband) pushing me out the window of our house!  I kept taking the pills to deal with the emotional pain of my shattered life. I have 2 awesome kids who deserve ME back!  So here I am, have not taken any today and won't take any. I have 5 in my nightstand that I keep yelling at. I won't take them as I hate them!  I figure if I can't quit with them right in front of me then I can't quit!  They are everywhere in this little town. I am a single mom of 2, a cancer survivor, and a good person so I know I am better than these stupid pills!  I am doing this alone so I need all the help, encouragement and honesty that yall can possibly give me!  My name says little girl but that is my size not my age!  I am 38 years young and weigh less than 100 pounds. I am naturally small as I eat everything but I know 20 norcos a day is way too much for this little body. I dont want to die!  I want me back!  Can yall help me find me?

[FourJays]

Hello and welcome . .  so glad you decided to post!  Wow, what a story; sounds like you have endured a lot of physical and emotional pain.  It is awesome that you have made the decision to quit the Norco's.  I personally have no problem with quitting cold turkey (did it myself), and do believe it to be a personal choice.  But I am concerned for you due to the high amount you have been taking, especially when considering your body weight.  Have you thought about tapering?  The withdrawal would probably be much easier on you.  If you are determined to do c/t, do you have a Dr. or anyone around you can call if you start feeling something is "not right"?  I know how it is when you have made the decision - you just want it done.  I just worry a bit about the quantity thing.  In any case, I congratulate your decision and determination to get clean . . . you wont regret it :))

[VICourageous]

I Ditto what FourJay said..It is your choice..I went c/t from 3 meds and I am in my 7th month and alive and well..That was a very good post..You sound fun..I have seen many, many Blessing on here come true..We have alot of Caring & Sharing Souls as you must know form lurking around for awhile..
You just stay on this ship and we will make sure you hit the land soon and walk proud and straight up..Maybe we could put some weight on you..Ha!
God Bless you for wanting your life back...
vickie

[littlegirlinbigworld]

Thanks so much for responding!  I would taper if i could as I am also concerned about the amount and i have no one to help!  But, i have none to taper with and have no money to get any. I just got laid off from my job on Monday so i am stuck. I had planned on starting to taper before i got laid off. Now i have no income and no insurance so i have to CT. It has been 15 hours and my stomach is so cramped that i can't sit up!  Gotta admit that I'm pretty scared. I had tapered before and was able to get clean for 2 months then broke my ankle and got started back on them. When i tapered it wasn't bad at all. I took care of the house and kids and worked everyday. Now i need to fin MD a job ASAP and can't do that if I'm hurting this bad and it hasn't even been 24 hours!  Im really scared here!

[FourJays]

Hi again - you said 15 hours since your last dose, right?  How many have you taken in the last couple of days; had you tapered down at all from the 20/day dose?  Try to relax as much as you can - take deep breaths in and blow out slow.  Is this cramping feeling something you have felt before?  Do you have any family or friends close that you can call to come over and check on you/help you out?

[littlegirlinbigworld]

Hi FourJays!  It has been 15 hours since mr last dose. I had not tapered at all because I thought I was going to get a refill today so that I could taper. When I called in for my refill, my doctor said I needed to come in for a check up and I can't afford one so I'm stuck with no taper!  I have never felt stomach pains like this before but have never went CT either. I dont have anyone that I can call for help. I wish I had family around but it's just me and my kids!  

[FourJays]

I did a c/t from a very high dose also, and the w/d set in within 24 hours.  Mine was pretty intense (I had been on the pills for 15 years & was at double your dose by the time I quit).  I didn't really experience stomach "cramping" per se; stomach upset & diarreah, oh yes.  I had a lot of sweating and crawly skin feeling as well as that overall feeling of doom & gloom.  I felt heavy and awkward, kind of like I was off balance.  These are all pretty common symptoms of c/t w/d.  I came out of it just fine; started feeling better after about 3 days and within a week to 10 days pretty much all of the physical discomfort was gone.  BUT - I am not a small girl and did not have the body weight v. dose amounts that you do.  You are going to have some nasty physical symptoms quitting like this, but how to gage when they become "dangerous" and opposed to just "uncomfortable & flu-like" is something only you can do.  I would suggest that if in doubt you really should get yourself to a walk-in clinic or ER.

One other idea - can you call your doctor and explain your situation, i.e., you are out of pills & will have to quit after taking them daily, but cant schedule check up right now (& why).  Ask if they could call in just a partial script - enough to at least taper down your amount a bit?  It may be worth a try?

In any case, please don't risk it.  You mentioned you have been reading around this site for awhile.  I'm sure you have read many posts about the various common w/d symptoms.  If you feel like something is not right - go the the ER right away; tell them what you have been taking and how long.  Hopefully you will get through this without this extreme; but please be careful and keep posting with your progress ok?  

[littlegirlinbigworld]

Thanks for responding to me!  I tried explaining to the doctor what was going on but that just made him want me to come in sooner as he is worried about the amount I'm on.

Im having severe stomach cramping but no stomach issues yet. I know they will be coming soon!  I have immodium to help with those!  

I really don't like going to the emergency room but I will if it is my only option. The biggest problem that I have at the emergency room is that I have to drive myself there. I dont know if I could do that with how I feel.

I will keep posting and praying that this won't be as bad as it could be. Thanks for taking the time to talk with me!  I hate this feeling of being alone!

[FourJays]

OK, you stay close to this site and keep posting . . . it has helped SO many people get through this process.  Glad you have the Immodium if you need it.  Drink as many fluids as you can too - anything with added vitamins/minerals would be good (Gatorade, Vitamin Water - "Revive", my personal favorite and lifesaver during my detox).  If you start feeling restless, take a hot bath or shower - Epsom salts can help with aches and pains if you have them.

I am glad to hear you are willing to do the ER thing if necessary.  If you cant drive yourself and it has come to that point, call 911 ok?  Hang in there . . think positive; it might not be nearly as bad as what you think.  And best of all . . it will be over in a few days and you will be on your way to a clean and free new life:))
Julie

[littlegirlinbigworld]

Thanks again FourJays!  I fell asleep and slept for 6 hours after taking Tylenol PM. I am sure my body is addicted to the Tylenol too!  I woke up to my legs jumping all over the bed and pouring sweat!  Just miserable!  I am running a 103 temperature. Is this part of withdrawals?  

[FourJays]

I'm not sure about the temperature...do you have some motrin u.can take?

[VICourageous]

How are you feeling now ???..Do you still have a high temp..That one has me worried..Come back and let us know..I am going to bump this up so we can check on you..OK...

[FourJays]

How are you doing?  Waking up hot and sweaty like that is not uncommon in the scenario you described.  Try a cool cloth on your face and neck, drink some water too.  Do you have any Motrin or Ibuprofen instead of the Tylenol?  After you have been up for a bit take your temp again & see if it has gone down any and then let us know ok?

[littlegirlinbigworld]

I just woke up about an hour ago with the fever. I had taken Tylenol pm about 6 hours before I woke up with the fever. Yes, I do have Motrin here and yes, I am still running a fever. My stomach is still cramping but not as bad as before!  I am not hungry at all but am very thirsty so I am on my 2nd Gatorade in an hour!  I know everyone says flu like symptoms but wasn't sure if you actually ran a fever like the flu. Thanks to everyone who is helping me!  Yall are making me not feel so alone!

[FourJays]

I don't remember if I actually ran a fever; I know I woke up sweaty and hot as you described; especially in those first few detox hours.  I glad you have Motrin too.  Just keep drinking as much as you can and try to keep yourself cooled down.  If your temp is still that high after another doing all of this in another 30 minutes or so I would call your doctor - I'm sure he has some kind of 24 hour pager service or something of that nature.  They should direct you what to do from there.  It's good to hear at least that the stomach cramping has gone down.

[littlegirlinbigworld]

I just took 2 Motrin and sm going go get into a warm bath!  I will continue to drink the Gatorade as that is what I am craving right now!  Overall I am feeling just as if I have the flu. The only thing different is that my legs feel like they want to take off running!  I will post an update as soon as I get done soaking.

[FourJays]

Yeah, the restless leg thing is very common too.  Hopefully the bath and the Motrin will help a bit.  I literally spent hours in the tub during my first few days - it was the only way I could get comfortable.  And that is kind of what these couple of days will be like - just do whatever you can to make yourself comfortable and know that it will not last long.  At this point you are pretty much through day 1 - yay!  You can do this . . hang in there.  And again, if after your bath and the Motrin, if your fever is still that high please call your doctor ok?

[VICourageous]

Ok the fever does have me worried..I am glad FourJays here too..I have never experience a high fever coming off the hydo/oxy or my methadone..Do you have the magnz salt you know the Epson salt..It helps draw the poisons out.
Get under a heating blanket too..Do all the above as FourJay mentioned..I will check back on you too..OK. You are not alone..
vickie

[littlegirlinbigworld]

Ok so the bath just gave me the chills!  I am now running 102.8 so I called my doctor and spoke with the answering service. Im waiting on them to call back.

[VICourageous]

OK Let us know what up..It sounded like the fever went down a bit..Get under the Electric Blanket if you have one..
vickie

[littlegirlinbigworld]

Ok yall. Nurse called back said a low grade fever is normal but not over 100. Of coarse he wants me to go see him tomorrow but I don't have the money to do that so am hoping I will be better on the morning!

[VICourageous]

You let us know OK..I think it will go down..You know what to do if it does not..DO NOT let the fever go for to long..Go to the ER if it is high..Check again in a few..To see how it is....Get some rest OK...

[littlegirlinbigworld]

I will keep yall updated on how tonight and tomorrow goes. Im curled up in bed now with my heating blanket and Gatorade. Am ready to try to get more sleep!  Thanks for helping me!  

[VICourageous]

OK!!!! NIGHT.. NIGHT...
MAY GOD BE WITH YOU HUN..

[FourJays]

How are you doing today?  So glad you were able to talk to the nurse last night.  Hope you got some sleep and are feeling a little bit better today.
Julie