DAY 10 this morning and i ........

[umustbdreaming]

had a weak moment! This morning around 5 a.m. i took 1 5mg vicodin :( it was almost out of habit. I had 10 left this whole time and took nothing for 10 days. The withdrawals were over and i was only fighting it in my head. I had second thoughts about taking it, but i just couldnt help myself. Ive let myself down so now ive flushed the other 9! I should have done that in the first place. So heres to day 1 again! Ill keep you guys posted throughout the day to see if i withdrawal at all. i shouldnt really cuz i was only taking between 30-50mg a day towards the end of 16 month habit.

[ProdigalGirl]

I only flushed pills  in the case of an emergency once. I had no choice but to flush or I was in TROUBLE!! So, I applaud you for your proactive flushing. I have not been able to let go of  a med  in my home that could get me into deep trouble if I started messing with them. Can't seem to find the strength or will power to do so. Also scared for another reason, but I could get rid of them. I am proud of you. This struggle goes on and on it seems sometimes. Dust yourself off and be happy you only took 1 pill. You could have taken all 10 so today was not as bad of a day as you originally thought.

ProdigalGirl

[corey411]

Great job flushing. I know how hard that was...I was only able to do that once. The rest of the times I just finished off what I had then started over so congratulations. Don't beat yourself up over this. Learn from it and move on. You can't keep pills around. This happens enen after months. I finally am almost 5 months clean and if I had pills in the house I could probably only handle it for a few hours. It would grip me by the back of the neck and dig in till I caved. Not sure if it will always be like that but don't ever want to put myself in a situation were I have to find out. Congrats on day 1 again.....Nothing can take away those 10 days clean. Eventually the number of days you have won't seem so important...That your clean today is the most important thing. God bless....go do something nice for Valentines Day. Corey