First of all--a great big hug of comfort to you! You need it. My Dad passed away unexpectedly and suddenly when I was young, and I went through the gamut of emotions you are going through. Didn't think I would make it through. Time, my friend, will carry you through to the other side of this nightmare. Be patient with yourself, and remind yourself of that. It is something you can count on. In the meantime, your ideas of making all the positive changes in your life that your father would have been proud of are the best things you can be doing for yourself right now. They are healing both in the mind and body. Keep reminding yourself daily of how proud your dad would be of you. Do not expect the pain of his loss to go away soon. It will remain for some time yet. Just accept that. But your positive course of actions give you something proactive to do and will give you a boost of self esteem as well. Also, others may disagree, but I believe your father will see the changes you are making and be proud of you, too. I will say a prayer for your strength and courage, and for that of your family right now. God bless you! Please keep us posted with your progress--we CARE!!!!
Gasten
Those were some powerful posts and worth reading over and over. Life can stink, like with work situations, family issues, financial issues. The list goes on. Yet, life can be great, too, like the birth of a child or finding out your son got a 30 on his ACT (both events of which gave me a high better than any pill could).
It is a hard lesson to learn. Life is so darned unpredictable. We want to be in control. It is hard to accept that we aren't.
The thing is, there are some things you can control. I already know you can stop those pills. Oh, the withdrawal stinks, I will never forget that. I am not saying life will be roses after you quit. However, you will be able to truly experience it.
You are so young to have all this responsibly, yet I believe you have the determination and courage to take this on.
I am proud of what you have accomplished before. I know you are capable of making it because you did it before.
Hugs to you, Sweetie. You've got this.
Minn
Glad to read this....Hope it all goes well for you!
I have walked in your shoes. for some time. your nor alone.
Please detox and move forward. we can't continue this life. its slowly killing us. from being super high to super low. its hard on your body.
i can't do anymore detoxing. my body is tired. very very tired. each new detox takes alot of energy. Im not as young as i once was.
Time will march on. and the next time you look up. where do you wAnt to be?? here. or there??
Im not trying to bring you down. i am trying to show you the future if you keep using.
I will support you.
I've wasted 8 years. feel like Im in quick sand today. but its all part of the process. for 8 years i didn't feel anything. do anything. except exist.
Now Im picking up the pieces. and they are scattered everywhere.
this won't kill you. getting off this crazy ride. what it will do is be very very hard. i know your going tthru alot. I've kept you in my prayers.
I promise it will be worth it. give yourself a month. a month to even out again. feel what you feel. talk to us.....were all here for you.
Hugs...support....hugs some more.....more support. bama
you guys are right... its time to turn things around for myself. no more using to get through things... today will be day one again! lol $hit! already feeling a little crappy but i gotta do this... time to man up and do what needs to be done... wrote my exam now theres no reasons to continue down the road and hurt myself even more... thanks for the help guys... the battle has begun. just wish i never started to do this all over again but.. thats the past. living in the moment for a couple more days should get me through this... i just really hope it wont be like the first time.... even a little easier would be a godsend! haha well either way i gotta do it so im about to find out! im just so exhausted of putting myself through all this. gotta dig deep and fight it with all i got. ill keeo in touch on how im doing! thanks again to everyone for your continuing support!
To add to that sometimes the reasoning for using is the exact reason NOT to use. I mean that to be as supportive and kind as possible. It took me a long time to figure that out. Hope things turnaround for you soon.