HI there!
Yes, unfortunately you didn't handle this properly, as you know. Most sub docs do not permit the use of benzos at ALL with sub, due to a contraindication, but even if they did, yours was obviously not prescribed. They were totally justified discharging you unfortunately.
You could try to find a new clinic who would be willing to take you on as a patient, and yes, you should be honest with them. A sub taper should be done slowly and gradually, and there can be some w/d symptoms, being that your dose is on the higher side, and you were still on a pretty reasonable dose, you shouldn't have had but a few days of some mild symptoms. And you're right, everyone is different. Your doc should have listened to your input and slowed the taper down.
It's really not a good idea to try to come off at your current dose, w/ds will likely be pretty awful. The Suboxone clinic I worked at recommended people taper down to AT LEAST 0.5mg before stopping completely, and even at that dose, there usually is some level of w/d.
Using isn't an option, try to get yourself back on track, and if you can find a new doc, you need to be compliant with the clinic's rules, which includes not using any other substances they don't know about and are okay with (and can verify through a valid script). Consider that a lesson learned!
You can find another doc in your area by going to:
www.suboxone.com
Good luck, let us know how you're doing!
I'd find someone else, and be up front. Subs are a bear to kick, despite the literature. I'm on 4 mg. and maybe undermedicated. But an 8 mg at once drop is huge. Even 6 mg. is like dropping from over 200 mg. morphine. It's a very strong drug.
Others may have different opinions, and I'm not a good judge. I'm struggling with subs myself.
I just don't think I'd try to come off that amount on my own.