Triggers and Family and Pills - Oh my

[IwillDoThis]

Yesterday was my 60 day mark, I was flying high on life, feeling so good, so positive. I'm a person who says pills are no longer an option for me - I say this because I'd rather project the outcome I want, it works for me.

So last night late my very dysfunction family situation erupted with phone calls and stressful situations from mom and siblings - thank god I don't live near them.  I was so upset last night based on the three ring circus that was going on for the first time I REALLY wanted to reach for a pill to sleep, to relax, TO ESCAPE.  I resorted to ice cream and french fries rather than pills.

It can be so easy to want that release when you are under intense pressure and stress, I had to really keep things in perspective through an upsetting situation and remember that what happened last night is a temporary situation that I cannot control.  I can listen, be empathetic but in the end they are in a situation of their own creating and I can only control MY actions.  We can be our own worst enemy or best friend.  Last night I chose to love myself, guard myself and keep moving forward on the path I have chosen.

When situations pop up that make you want to use - step back, wait just one more moment and really think it through completely.  For those who also live in a three ring circus - HANG TOUGH!

[notme42long]

You Will Do this! My wife is so strong in the spirit of her faith. She is always telling me " The words that come out of your mouth " say it and it will be done. I have 6 brothers and sisters and I know dis fun. I love them all but I stay away from them all except for my 1 sister. You have given me so many kind words and support in the short time that I have been around here. I just want to say excellent job on being strong. Personalities like us usually want to fix everything sometimes that's half the reason we trying to sedate ourselves with drugs in alcohol. I wasnt  around all day yesterday. saw this a little late. Just wanted you to know we have prayed for you.

[IwillDoThis]

Lu, Sean, All and Gnarly - THANK YOU.   The clown shoes are off, I stepped out of the ring, had a LONG discussion with my mother today about boundaries, not projecting negatively on what might, could happen with our family and that I need to focus on ME right now.  

Boundaries are healthy and good - I must remember to put them up, keep them up and not hesitate to remind my every loving family when they try to bum  rush those boundaries.

I read all of our struggles every single day and I do take something from each of you.  Thank you family!

[lulu747]

IWILL...

Girl you're doing amazing.  You are thinking clearly and putting up strong boundaries for yourself and your recovery... Oh the growth and evolution has me cheering!  .  Keep showering yourself with that love and self respect and say NO to the crazy making. The world can go mad and you just keep right on breathing and being your beautiful self.   I know it's hard when it's your family, but self-preservation is a MUST.  You are a role model for many darlin' and I'm so proud of you.  
Wishing you some peace tonight...
xo
Lu

[Allscrewdup]

Thanks for that post cuz that's how I feel everyday of my life.

[NorthEast213]

IWILL....   This was a homerun for me.... I too was flying high... I have the same outlook as you.  Yesterday was a cluster truck for me as well...   It humbled me and reminded me to never get to high or to low.  First thing I saw this morning was a Wendys commercial and I was done.... Haven't stopped eating since.

Mama said there would be days like this..... She was right..

Good job on keeping your cool!

Sean

[sandstone27]

I Read your comments about the night time crazies yesterday...
It sounds like you handled it all and then some!  Good for you.

Here's to a better rest of the weekend...

S.

[n8tiv_ndn]

Thanks brother Gnarly ....I agree that aftercare is definitely a crtical component to full recovery....I can still hear your ever-present drum beat...thanks again man.......peace and prayers

M

[gnarly_1]

HI YOU did well but the successful in this 3 ring circus we call life get aftercare it is the building blocks to clean livinig it will teach you how to manage stressful situations both A/A AND N/A are free there are others also but those are the most common as addicts it is important we learn to change the very way we think and reason otherwise we can reason our selfs into anything take control of your life you cant change what goes on around you only how you respond good luck to both of you I wish you both successful recovery's good luck and God bless......Gnarly      

[IwillDoThis]

Brother this lil sister is hanging up her big red nose and floppy clown shoes FOR GOOD!