Still have a smile and wow has a weight been lifted...

[bucksfan]

Well if you have followed my postings then you know I stopped taking codone the 23rd with a accidental slip up last night. I have also posted about the stress I have because of my financial situation and the job offers I must decide from. I today after waking up and feeling awesome still do. I made my decision and have been going 100 miles hour since I did. I feel so much better mentaly from making the decision and knowing that I am going to make my adddiction work. My biggest fear was that I would find out I am a lazy bum and not very friendly unless I am on pills. That does not appear to be true and today is a testament to that. I have always been apeople person. When I was on pills I was even more so. Today I realized that I just like talking to people in general. I mean I almost feel high just by talking on the phone. Strange huh....anyways keep it up guys life is good!

[jt808]

hey bud good to read ur post like usual it make sme feel beter and bad at the same time cuz i kno i gota just get my act together again. anyway i really am glad that u are havn ur energy and that ur stress is over about the job situation hope all works out with you. keep us posted cuz i kno i wana kno how ur doing as well as others and when i get back on the sober train ill keep u all updated but after the christing ive been still  getn hgh which usually happans cuz once i slp up its usually a bad one than i come crawling bac here with my tail tucked between my legs. so keep it up!

[bucksfan]

INTOTHEDARK, that is awesome! I am really smiling thining of when we first spoke and how far we have come. Hold on a little while longer cause the grass really is greener. I am so honored to have met all of you!

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

i am glad that you gave us an update......people come and go at various stages here - - and you cant help but wonder if they made it, or if they relapsed again. They are welcome here regardless. Not sure if I can even think of someone that hasnt relapsed!  You just gotta keep quiting .........

[intothedarkagain]

How are you doing brother?
Sorry I have been gone for a while. I had to finish finals.
I lost so much time getting clean, but like you say, I am making it all back right now by going a 100 mph.
I AM STILL CLEAN.
Last night I slept great.
I wish I could say my attitude was bright, but I think that takes a while.
I am so proud of you brother.
Remember a week ago when things were going bad for me, you told me I could do it and I didn't really believe you.
Here i am.
Doing it.
Thanks.
Joshua From Oregon

[illadelphia984]

I couldn't agree with BQ more about you finding out that you're an even better person without something synthetic controlling you. YOU'RE controlling you now. I couldn't be happier for you. :) I really am glad that you decided to stay around this time. I found great solace in your posts when I first joined and I've seen you progress throughout my knowing you. Each day, it just keeps getting better for you. As Sara said, welcome to life man. I'm on day two and, even though it's only the start of my recovery, I know I can do it this time. Last night I was getting cravings and after reading cathy's journal entry about how to handle them, I found that I'm above this ****. I immediately talked to my spouse instead of holding on to the feeling and I found so much release in that, it's incredible really. I look forward to reading about your progress. God bless you and stay strong!

~Christine

[bucksfan]

Hey BQ,
Thank you so much for the honesty and kind words and yes my friend it is mind over matter for the ones who are on smaller dosages. 40mgs huh smaller dosages, its still to much regardless. I believed the same as you and I believed I had to start over but I do think it helped. Being upset with myself, not enjoying the buzz and then feeling great yesteday gave me the belief that I am stronger than this. I am up and at it 6:30 this morning. Worked until 8Pm last night speaking with clients. I will post my progress and continue to post each day for anyone that enjoys my posts. This was my downfall in the past. I would get clean and leave after 5 or so days. As you can see my friend its been over 2x as long and the first thing I do in the morning and before bed is check on yall. I really wish intothedarkagain would post. I read your posts BQ and you helped as well. I am glad you took the time to post that first day you did. Although it was extremely long it was real.

[BQ77]

Hey.  I have followed your posts the last week or so.  Actually you were one of the three or so people I have made sure to read daily and I believe you're the only original one I was following that's still here, so that's good because I can only assume those others have relapsed.  When you had your slip up I was very upset with you actually.  I honestly felt you should have started counting your days over, but I didn't want to post that at the time because I didn't feel it would be helpful towards your battle at the time.  I feel comfortable telling you this now as you are in a better place than that day.  In fact, I almost believe that although it was a bad slip up, that who knows?  Maybe it actually helped overall?  Without that maybe you would have slipped up even later and maybe totally relapsed?  

Now I think you can help a lot of those others out.  There have been several posts about people who are about a week clean and say they have no energy.  I think you can speak for them now like I can.  The energy thing is mind over matter.  Yes, you FEEL like you have no energy, so you chill out.  BUT....if you just get out there and move a bunch, you'll be surprised how much energy you actually have.  I know that's how it worked for me and it sounds like it's the same for you.  You didn't let the fact that you felt like you had no energy slow you down, you went out there and did your thing and now your energy is great.  Spread the word my friend!  Good job too!  No more slip ups!  Good luck and God Bless!

BQ

[Holliee]

glad to hear that go you :)

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

You may even find out that you are an even better person and even more of an asset to the human race without the pills. Who woulda ever thought, huh? When on the pills it didnt seem like there could be anything better..........what a joke, ehhh?

Stay strong - it isnt over yet - although you have won the first big battle. You will come out of this a winner ......

[dominosarah]

Welcome to life!!!  Nice to hear you being positive!!!!         sara