Withdrawals continue-please help.

[lulu747]

Ok.  So it's day 12 for me and for some reason I feel as though I'm back at day 5.  I am thinking it may be because I decreased my clonidine by half because I just took my BP which is usually super low even pre detox, pre opiates (never higher than 110/75) and it was 137/98 and my pulse was 124!  I am shaking like a leaf, sweating like crazy, and just feel plain miserable.  Does anyone have any suggestions about tapering the clonidine?  I was taking .3 mg at night while I tapered and upped it to .6mg split up during the day while going through the worst of days.  I just want to feel semi normal so I can get something accomplished other than being stuck huddled under a quilt and wondering when this is going to end.  Thoughts?

[lulu747]

Yep.  Fell asleep at 1 and up at 5.  I guess 4 hours is better than nothing.  I suppose our bodies adjust to less sleep but yeah-feeling a little punchy.  So sleepy yet no love.  I don't have to be anywhere until 10 so am going to give it one more go...wish me luck....Lu

[gnarly_1]

Hey Lulu......sleep will come back but its usually the last thing to return hang in there we got your Instamatic meddle waiting lol but I know its not funny I dident sleep right for 2 mo but thats methadone for you I will keep you in my prayers good luck and God bless........Gnarly  

[lulu747]

You're right Vicki-it went well...I underestimated myself.  I ended up committing to a heck of a lot more work for next year but minus the opiates I think I'll be able to handle it.  I am actually really excited about work right now...weird to say that because for years I've lived in fear of being sick and disappointing.  I have new hope.  And that's priceless.  Much gratitude for all support and kind words and if I could just ask one more thing?  Please pray for me to sleep tonight(:  Hugs...Lu

[vicki595]

Oh!!  I sure know how that feels!   Good luck!  Sometimes we get surprised and end up doing just fine with everything coming together perfectly!

Hang on!!

[lulu747]

Thanks guys-Vicki I have about a million things to do today and feel like even dressing myself is an ordeal.  I've been staying away from the coffee because of the anxiety (I've never been good with stimulants)  Maybe I'll try some hot chocolate this morning for the buzz.  It's a beautiful day outside-sunny and 8 degrees-pretty much miraculous for this time of year(:  I'll go for a walk with my dogs and hopefully that will give me some energy to prepare all that needs to be prepared.  I feel pressure about this meeting as it's a charitable function I am chairing and I missed the last two meetings due to this detox.  I don't want to let anyone down....So tired of letting people down.  Wish me luck..love to all...Lu

[vicki595]

Listen, try to just concentrate on today and tonight. Do you have much to do before the meeting? At work?

Get prepared for tonight and just rest yourself prior. A cup of tea or coffee before the meeting will perk you up temporarily.  You'll be fine!  I know you feel awful but you sound really good!!    This is such a hectic time of year that everyone else at that meeting will be exhausted,as well!

[Wanttobebetter2011]

I've been keeping up with your posts and u are inspiring me, please keep it up! I'll be praying for you!

[lulu747]

Argh.  Awake again.  Fell asleep at midnight and awoke at 3:30.  It's 6 am and no hope of sleep insight.  I don't understand this.  Two weeks clean today(:  I was feeling so much improvement and now another backslide.  I know it's how it is but I'm just so exhausted. Couldn't be more weary and with my board meeting tonight I need to be on my game.  Frustrated.

[lulu747]

I finally had a good sleep-7 consecutive hours and I feel much better.  Thank you to all for your kind words and support....I don't know what I would have done without it....Lu

[lulu747]

Thanks guys...crying a little bit now.  I am trying to be strong but the fact is I'm angry that I've lost five years of my life to illness and pain and misery.  I go out in the world and I look normal but I feel so weary.  I was only 28 when I got sick.  It's hard not to think about all I have lost.  But I am so grateful to be alive.  And so grateful for all of your loving support.  This forum has been nothing short of a God send for me.  It's the first time I haven't felt alone in this illness in 5 years.  I have a wonderful family and friends but they just hate watching me suffer and I feel so much pressure to be well.  I WANT to be well.  I don't feel depressed but I definitely feel sad and so much older than I should....Thank you, thank you, thank you to all....Lu.

[bama88]

Hi I detoxed from oxies. It took me two weeks to stop feeling sick. I was a mess. The runs throwing up watery eyes. I looked like I was constantly crying yawning and shaking. Your almost out of the woods. Don't turn back now. Your doing super duper. Your a trooper. By Christmas youll feel 100% better. Just watch out for depression. That's where I am at. I get crazy mood swings still. Some of us take longer to heal. I thought five days was all. Not for me. Your not alone. I am with ya with ten days ahead of you. I am over the physical sickness now on to mental. I am sending you a hug. Try to find something to occupy your time and mind. That helps me. Bless you. And be proud of yourself. You deserve to feel good. It will happen.

[lulu747]

It appears I followed your advice before you gave it(:  Just went out into the world and did some shopping and even ended up getting interviewed for the local news...Thank god I was in full hair and make up.  I have a really good doctor now who is respecting my choice for no medication.  Obviously if I have a flare I'll have to take steroids or whatever if it gets out of control...But I've been managing my autoimmune illnesses pretty well naturally by doing yoga, vitamins, massage, saunas, and healthy eating.  My big problem was the intensive surgery I had in Sept 2010- I was on a high high dose of opiates after that and it's taken me a year to taper to the point of jumping off. I truly think the opiates have been more harmful than helpful and I am hopeful that once this detox runs it's course I will feel better than ever before.  I am going to continue to force myself out into the world but I am extremely run down and fear getting really sick.

[justme1119]

I am just a few days ahead of you and sorry to say, still struggling.  When I get up and get out of the house, it is sooo much better.  Laying around, for me, just produces more laying around.  I go from bad to worse when I'm not out of my house and have my mind occupied.  The nights are hard because I'm home at night.  I hate housework and it depresses me to see the mess I've accumulated.  Hang in there.  You inspire me to go on.  Even though I was on methadone and Norco, it seems as if you are having a harder time than I am.  I've been to two football games and it has been the best possible time because I get my mind off of what I'm going through.  I have been able to fake it by putting on lots and lots of make up, fixing my hair, and looking half way normal.  Forcing myself up and to work during the first two weeks was the hardest thing I've ever done, but I may have lost my mind if I had stayed home in the bed.  I suggest that you plan an outing and just go for it!  My own opinion is, if you really have such issues that require medication, you should find a doctor that specializes in treating patients like you, who have had issues with meds in the past.  Surely there is some doctor out there that could help you get what you need for your auto-immune disease, without prescribing debilitating medication?  

[lulu747]

thank you....

[ricart70]

Hi lulu,  some people just take longer to get better.I know I wasn't getting any more sleep than you are at 12 days.You are still in the normal range.
I just wanted to encourage you and tell you that I also went through this protracted withdrawal.Mine didn't go away and come back it just didn't want to go away.You are doing good and this will not last.hang in there.

[lulu747]

Mucho gracias to all-again only 3 hours sleep and I feel a weariness that I never thought possible.  At the same time my anxiety is high and I seem to still be flushing this poison out of me.  I'm wondering if it's taking so long because of the nalexone that was in my medication.  None of the doctors or pharmacists I know really understand how that drug works.  It was developed in Australia to combat both the oxy addiction problem and to help ease bowel symptoms of people needing to take opiates for chronic pain.  I can't hardly find any information about it and am trying not to beat myself up for putting a drug in my body without understanding the ramifications.  I feel terrible and discouraged and worn out.

[dominosarah]

Yep, turn on some music.  keep your chin up, you really are doing great~~

[gnarly_1]

hey get a blanket and roll up on the couch put on some soft music you like and just lay there with your eyes closed and get lost in the music this will help
if you get a chance over the next few days run down some YOGI kava relaxing tea.....the walmart out here carrys it  it realy works good for me one of the best teas I have found but try the music thing for tonight it will help.......Gnarly

[lulu747]

Thanks for the encouragement I need all I can get,  Am wide awake despite the hot bath, meletonin and sleep meds.  It feels like every nerve ending in my body is on fire and screaming and I know this is just the adjustment from being off the opiates but I am suffering big time.  Don't know what to do-can't read, can't watch a movie my brain just can't handle the stimulus.  At the same time I can't stand laying in bed not sleeping.  Sorry for the whining-I know there are others out there suffering much more than I am....I pray for them and for the light at the end of the tunnel which seems dim right now.

[gnarly_1]

HI Lulu hope your feeling better and sound asleep but if this thing is still meeing with you let me write this to encourage you to keep pushing on sometimes withdrawals come back ....I dont know why some get it and some people dont but its the way it is so you just got to get threw it hang in there tomorrow is another day and just may be fine you should be good to go by wensday usually these things only last a day or 2 if they come back after going away keep us posted good luck and God bless.......Gnarly

[lulu747]

Thanks Vicki I'm hanging in...still not sleeping and crazy w/d today for some reason but I'm eating, drinking, and trying to exercise.  My brain feels like total mush.  I am still sneezing and yawning and running to the bathroom every 20 minutes.  Ridiculous.  But I know the only way out is through and there is no way I'm going back so I'll take the suffering.  I have an important board meeting on Wednesday night and I just pray I am over the hump by then.  It will be two weeks on Tuesday...the longest freaking two weeks of my life.  But worth it.  I know it.  Praying for sleep....

[vicki595]

Clonidine, like anything else, should be tapered in small amounts over time. Maybe you dropped too much at once? Check with the doctor tomorrow.

Are you still drinking enough?  Getting in all those electrolytes (potassium,sodium,etc...)? You still need to do that...

Sorry this has been so protracted for you. We're all so different in how/what we feel! It amazes me...

Don't lose your good attitude now! A detox will wax and wane so hang in there!

[lulu747]

Am detoxing off 100 mg of Targin (oxycontin and nalexone) Horrible freaking drug.  I took a dose of clonadine and my BP stabilized and I went for a walk in the freezing cold (though sunny) Am feeling slightly better but my body feels as though it has regressed about a week.  I know a lot of you say this can happen-I guess I am just so worn out because I was tapering for 3 months before going cold turkey and I just want the withdrawals to end....I have been super positive up until this point and I will persevere because I will make no other choice-but yeah-12 days is a long time to suffer this.  Thanks for the kind words as always.

[Ballgame]

What are you detoxing from? How much?  Just curious since its day 12.
Clonadine really helped me