ok, i am here. someone asked why waiting for hubby yesterday? well, since i am in a wheel chair i can't drive and with the weather so bad my hubby is the only one to drive me places, he is the only one i trust. i know sounds weird why i can't trust my mom or brother but, i have issues since my accident and i have anxiety about getting in moving things and my hubby is helping me overcome that. anyway, went to the pain doc 2 hours away and they gave me 5 15 mg morphine to take 1 a day until friday because the clinic is going to close on the 1st of April and they are trying to figure out what to do with all their patients. ****, i told them that i was gonna die between now and friday on only a 15 mg morphine to get me through but, since my doc wasn't available i had to see a pa-c in the clinic and my appt was at 3 i didnt get to see anyone until 415 by then my doc was gone, left at 400. gee i am upset dont know what to do, i am waiting for a call from my spine surgeon at harborview and ask if he can help me, i hope he can, he did give me a script when i left harborview and the rehab facility went by what he had written and that is what they gave me in rehab, which was a morphine drip and a standing order for injections inbetween as needed. so anyway, i am not quite back to square 1 but by tomorrow or thursday i might be, see i took 2 of the 15's this morning about 430 and slept until 10am i have 3 left and i wont touch them until tomorrow and maybe just try 1, i dont know i will see what happens but hopefully i can find some help, i am not crying just yet but, give me a few hours and i will be drowning in my tears................. what to do...........my hubby has a few shady cousins on his side and he was gonna put them on the hunt for some meds, cause our reservation is just like a mini-walgreens everbody and their dog sells pills, so i told him hold off for a bit, and he hasn't asked them, but, they look up to him and would do anything for him so i might send them out snooping for 2 of them to get me by until friday. i know it is wrong but, i wont go through what i went through yesterday............... :-)