Curious

[SoYouSay]

I'm curious to know from those of you who use - What kinds of personality changes did you experience?  Specifically, what did family and friends point out to you and what did you notice?  I'm trying to determine if a loved one is using.
Thank you.

[notgoingdown]

I didnt think my AH was having an affair but I did think that he was pulling away, maybe falling out of love with me. I now know it is like Sara says... his first love is the pills.

[dominosarah]

The only affair we usually have is with our pills....They are our first love.  I hope you will seek some sort of support.  You have not caused this and you arent the enemy.  Take care of yourself and watch the money thing too.  Addiction affects the whole family.  Keep us posted on how you are doing..........sara

[SoYouSay]

"BTW what kind and how many do you think he is taking?" Not really sure… I'm thinking Hydro &/or Oxys. I've not snooped, so really don't have a clue.
I like your idea and have looked in my area for this kind of support. I've just not gone to anything, yet. So true that we need to help ourselves. I thought the change in behavior was caused by me for months… Thought an affair was the only logical exlanation. The sneakiness/suspicious behavior was so out of character.

Turns out it's a drug addiction turning our lives into a roller coaster ride…
I miss the intimacy we used to share, the most. I hate feeling like the enemy all the time.

[SoYouSay]

Thanks.. Keep 'em coming...

[BIKERDAD1963]

For me I went from being a very funny friendly person to a man without a sense of humor and not wanting to do anything anymore. I became very moody and angry. I stopped driving when possible because i was afraid of my road rage. My sex drive was gone after a few years of use. I made up the amount of pain i was in for an excuse to keep taking more meds and stronger meds. I was very active and played with my kids and did a lot of outdoors stuff. after the drugs I became lazy, I ignored my children and pretty much just laid around the house watching tv and sleeping. I would go to bed around 9 and wouldnt get up until 8 the next morning and not until 10 on weekends. And of course i was getting up at nite and taking pills. I became depressed but i didnt even care as long as the drugs were there. the drugs took over for my family and I was ok with that.

[notgoingdown]

I am in the same boat as you. I have been battling AH for almost a year now to admit that there might be a problem but he either doesnt see it or knows it is a problem but still has no intention of stopping. I have found pills hidden in the most ridiculous places but still refuses to see it the way I do.

BTW what kind and how many do you think he is taking?

I have been attending al anon meetings (not many nar anon in my area) to try to learn how to put the focus on me and my mental health. The constant snooping makes me crazy and is not healthy for me. Not to mention, is changes nothing with his addiction. I would suggest looking into nar anon or al anon meetings for you. You will find a web of face to face support that will help you to save your sanity and more.

[RionV]

When I was on Pain pills, I was down right mean, without even noticing until my family pointed out my behavior. I snapped easily, arrogant and not caring about other people like I used to. Of course there is the happy, giddiness that goes with it, followed by plenty of mood swings of course, those were awful. I would snap at someone who didn't deserve it, and felt guilty afterwards.

Now that i'm clean, my family says i'm "like my old self" Nice, caring, helping and more ambitious.

It was like once I got my "fix" I didn't care about anything else, I was content and blew off big responsibilites and oppourtunies.

[Michiganguy328]

I had never taken pain pills before and with my back problems my doctor went from zero to 10/325 vics, and 4 Benzos a day.  It took me a few months to figure out why I was such a wreck (I was a zombie, paranoid, and very moody).  Every time I stopped taking the pills my whole body started to hurt and I would end up in Emergency.  When I finally figured it out that it was the drugs I got into treatment.  The last 40 days have been heII, but I'm getting better every day and almost feel normal today.  Hang in there and be strong.  Seek help if you need to.

G

[Charetti]

Its been really helpful for me to read through these.  I can recognize myself in many of these symptoms.  Scary....and hopeful.

[SoYouSay]

Pain Pills.. Not sure which ones... It started with legit due to injury...

[troubleinohio]

for me it depended what stage of my addiction i was at (i used pain pills btw, what drug are you suspicious of here??). Early in my addiction, i was a cleaning maniac when i had my pills. I thought I was superwoman. I could get the vacuuming done in a whirl, get dishes washed, the house clean top to bottom, 10 loads of laundry etc etc then would crash and sleep all night (unusual for me as Im normally an insomniac). I would also talk a mile a minute, be overly gregarious (am normallly kinda shy and quiet), in a overly happy mood... When i was out of pills, I couldnt sleep AT ALL during the night, craving my drug and panicking, thinking about where I could get more in a hurry. If i couldnt get my drugs, i would get very sick- diarrhea, stomach pains, back and body pain (severe), no energy, VERY FOUL MOOD, crying spells, depression.   Later on i just got plain lazy even when i had my pills. I no longer felt like doing all the housework while high, would just lay around watching TV or use the computer and zone out and then get dopesick once i ran out again.
other signs you could look for- strange or secretive phne calls, unexpected trips (running out to buy drugs after a phone call ). RUnning out of money..

again, what drug are you thinking someone close to you is using? the signs can be different..

[Astray]

I was just evil to be around, paranoid, generally couldnt behave like a decent human being or socialise successfully. Of course this didnt happen overnight, it was a gradual downspiral. No one knew so they just thought thats just how I was.

[dominosarah]

No interest in sex, lack of good body hygiene, I ate a ton of ice cream as i craved sweet things, weight gain or loss, sniffing alot, runny nose, skin the color of an elephant........

[10356]

Yes it does.. I'm sorry you are dealing with this..

[SoYouSay]

"falling asleep at inappropriate times..  secretive, moody vague distant.. no longer enjoys doing things that bought pleasure before" Im guessing this includes no interest in sex?

"arrogant, smarta$$ and when I was pill sick I was hateful, pain butt be around and just plain mean. But when I was high most time always talking, out going, laughing etc... kinda like a happy manic mood and Mood swings are bad when using opiates - one minute great mood next pissed off at nothing"

So far we're batting a 100. :0(
Anyone else?

[10356]

Hello and welcome to the forum.. depending on the drug but most give a euphoric effect followed by a busy time then a down spiral. or falling asleep at inappropriate times..  secretive, moody vague distant.. no longer enjoys doing things that bought pleasure before. I'm sure others will chime in and I sure hope you are wrong.. lesa

[Holliee]

Wow this could be a long list. When I got real bad on pain pills they said that I was kinda arrognant (misspelled) smarta$$ and when I was pill sick I was hateful, pain butt be around and plain mean. But when I was high most time always talking, out going, laughing etc... kinda like a happy manic mood.

Since getting off pills they say I am back to my old self again. Low voice as was my whole life, sweet, caring, letting others talk and voice had a softness to it unlike when I was on pills.

Mood swings bad when using opiates one minute great mood next pissed off at nothing.,