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Do i have Depression

So umm.. for about a year now i have been feeling like death is the only way out of this dark hole i have seemed to fallen into i literally overthink everything i do for example about nine months ago I fingered myself after holding some coins and i now think I have HIV and Hepatitis then i backwashed into a glass and my friend drank it now i think i have given hepatitis to her what makes it worse is that she has a child and if the child has  hepatitis i will never be able to forgive myself , I also played a harmonica then gave it to another one of my friends children and she played it which meant my saliva could of given her hepatitis which makes me hate myself so much I literally am the worst person alive ! and i feel that if i tell my friends about this cause I'm know they will hate me i want to die and feel if i were not here life would be a lot better for everyone else I'm a horrible person and shouldn't be allowed to have a nice life. When I'm alone with my thought they don't go away they just keep eating away at me is there anything i can do to help stop my thoughts getting out of hand Thank you.
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Avatar universal
get checked. if anything is positive join a support group.  get medication for your depression.
12975971 tn?1428009678
Honey...You can't contract HIV or hepatitis that way.Your depressed and it's leading to paranoid psychosis its ok,you'll be ok. You need to go see a therapist who can help you figure out why your feeling this way. They can also get you into see a psychiatrist to maybe try some medication. I don't know how old you are but you sound young. Do you have a trusted friend or adult/parent you can talk to? Please stop obsessing about HIV and hepatitis...my 19 yr old son was very depressed and thought the police were coming to arrest him and that he gave his ex herpes because she was in the hospital. He woulde wake me up every night at 3 am wanting me to pack and leave with him. He has been seeing a therapist and on meds and is so much better. There is help and hope...
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