Thank you so much for your reply. That’s correct I am on suppression and haven’t had an outbreak in months. He is making me feel quite bad about it and I’m worried that when he goes to the doctor they will just tell him it’s HSV and send him on his way.
Obviously I know in my head there was no chance this could happen but I wanted to have some other advice.
There are all kinds of reasons why this didn't happen.
STDs are not transmitted by fingers. There is too much movement and air involved, and in addition, herpes isn't spread by fluids. It's spread by direct skin to skin contact.
While it is possible for someone to touch an outbreak and then touch their mouths or eyes and infect that area, it is usually during a new infection. That's called auto-inoculation. You don't mention having an outbreak.
Also, oral hsv2 is very rare. It would be highly unlikely that he'd get oral hsv2 even if he performed oral sex on you, much less from fingers.
Also (again), you are on suppression, which reduces your chances of shedding, so even if it were possible to transmit STDs by fingers, it would make it less likely.
In any case, he's fine and just panicking needlessly.
The only way you can transmit hsv2 is by genital to genital contact, usually penetrative sex, maybe grinding or rubbing.
The transmission rates may be lower than you (and he) think:
Ghsv2 transmission, female to male, over the course of a year, assuming sex 2-3 times a week:
Only avoiding sex during an outbreak - 4-5%
Adding condoms OR daily suppression - 2-3%
Adding condoms AND daily suppression - 1-2%
Please don't let him make you feel like a walking bio-hazard. You aren't.