How to tell if my chiropractor (a guy) is into me?

[mikesdream]

I have been seeing a new chiro for a month or so. I believe he is early 40s and single. He is very nice and never inappropriate, he always trying to get me on the right track health wise with exercise and eating better. I am 33 and married. But I have a slight crush on him and not sure why. (I could never cheat on my husband whether we having issues or n)
He is not a super attractive man, but he is to me.. I just feel this connection, I kind of get giddy when around him. I just want to know if this is me being weird or if he could possibly have interest in me that makes me feel that way. He seems like he jokes and smiles w/ me and talks with me like we are friends. He high fives me when I leave appointments. He rambles about health stuff and I have caught myself not even listening to him as I watch him…Also I have caught him once for a millisecond glance at my chest while we talked and has complimented me once that I look nice. He seemed to look nice yesterday when I saw him but could totally be dressing up for other reasons lol.... Not sure if that means anything.

[specialmom]

In all honesty, find another chiropractor.  He is probably just being nice to a client and you are being inappropriate with these thoughts as a married woman.  It's okay, we all can have wandering thoughts. But to continue to go back to seek out the attention of another man?  Dangerous.  Don't do that to yourself or your family.  good luck

[specialmom]

Oh, and agree.  Crushes like this when in your situation may be a band aid for other things going on in your life.  Explore that and try to fix it before it's too late.

[mikesdream]

It is about my crumbling marriage. I have come to realize this. I need to work on my marriage Like I said Id never act on it whilst being together with my husband. But I was wondering why cant I stop thinking about him. And I think I have that answer seeing my home life.

[specialmom]

That's what crushes are like.  They are usually not based on reality at all.  It's fantasy and a distraction for real life.  Don't go back to him.  I'm not sure if medical doctors and chiropractors are held to the same standards, but doctor jeopardize their practice by stepping over the line with a patient.  Get busy in other areas of your life.  What about therapy?

[mikesdream]

and thank you

[mikesdream]

I have thought about therapy today. I think I would be fine to go back to him for the res of my prepaid treatment in 2 weeks... I have self control Its kinda slapping me in the face today, the reality of it and my home life.

[mikesdream]

I am not sure about jeapordizing practice for him I would assume its diff for chiro.. I do not see me and him hooking up though, I have fantasized about being his significant other but just in my head. Not really a lusty thing. Kinda weird.

[Nighthawk61]

Do you want to find out? if he is, then it becomes a contentious issue for him , one that would effect wanting you to continue as a client, in other words if a married women showed personal interest in him, he would probably do the professional thing and cut you loose. You have no intention of dating him if he was interest, all it would be is a complication and an ego booster for you. If that's important to you - it would only be a drain on this professional man. He obviously , if single, needs a women who is available to court. Do i think that this man would throw caution to the wind, after working so hard for a professional designation that relies so heavily upon their motto to not become intimate with patients? Not. I think that it's wrong on so many levels to fabricate relationships with people outside of your husband. and your marriage. I think you have to focus on a pastime that allows for your creative nature to flourish, that doesn't include picturing the help as possible partners. Your married, your married. right? why not spend the time and work on your marriage with your excess romantic energy? Add new ways for you and your husband to become closer, like date night, or bowling, or going to exhibitions or concerts. Travel more?

[Nighthawk61]

I'm really glad to hear that you're thinking about therapy for yourself - it's important that you have a marriage that doesn't leave you fantasizing about someone else. You do deserve the kind of mate you're happy to be with and a therapist can get you to see if your marriage can be that for you, or not. I'm glad you're now seeing that you could use that kind of support. Please keep your thread alive, and let us know how you're faring. All the best.

[Nighthawk61]

You can also talk here about your marriage if you think you would be served by advice on that front. If not, i hope you do so with a therapist. Keep your head up. You sound like a really good person, and it didn't take you long to see through what the fantasy was about. I'm sorry things are bad for you in your marriage, I'll keep you in my prayers. There's always solutions to any problem.

[Mzsmith77]

My advice to you would be to be careful with your actions and behavior, from experience once you’ve crossed  that line there is no coming back. You can tell yourself all day I would never cheat on my husband but you’re behavior and thoughts aren’t really saying that. The way I take what you’re saying is if the opportunity presented itself it’s a possibility that you might take it. Take some time away from this guy and seriously think about what it is that you are really enjoying from this flirtatious relationship. Could it be something that you are missing from your relationship with your husband, most of us seek out that type of attention from our spouse and don’t even realize it until we are getting it from someone els. Have you ever  thought about how you would feel if you found out that your husband was seeking out or behaving in the same manner as you? I feel you would get mad if he was doing the same thing. If it would make you mad then you’re probably not ready to risk messing up your relationship for something that could only turn out to be a fling. I love attention and have entertained a couple of flings myself and they were not worth it. My husband found out about them and it just ruined the trusting relationship that we had, what’s even worse is that the guys i was seeking the attention from they weren’t worth remembering. I regret not talking to my husband and telling him what I needed from our relationship before seeking elsewhere .

[Nighthawk61]

I regret not talking to my husband and telling him what I needed from our relationship before seeking elsewhere .

These are powerful words and great advice.

[AnnieBrooke]

What do you expect will happen in the best of circumstances? And would that even be good?