Just broke up

[Daisy884]

Me and my boyfriend broke up on Friday on our 1 year anniversary.  He gets mad quite a lot.  And so this day, I was buying dinner for our anniversary, and the first thing he says when he walks in the door is "My car is out of gas, you'll have to drive"....so I tease him and say "Oh, you are making me pay for dinner ANd drive...just kidding!" and I give him a kiss.  So we get in the car and start going downtown, I park in free parking where we would have to walk a little ways to the restaurant, he starts complaining saying he wants to just get out of the car and go into the restaurant, he doesn't want to walk.  so I tell him, stop complaining, I'm trying to do something nice for you and buy you dinner.  So I move and pay for parking so we don't have to walk as far.  Then he starts complaining saying I should've told him to bring a jacket since its so cold (its winter, wouldn't he know himself?)  So i tell him again, please stop complaining, I'm buying you dinner you should be a little more appreciative of me!  So he tells me that I rub it in his face that I'm buying him things and he doesn't want ANYTHING from me anymore.  I tell him I was trying to say that he should just be more appreciative and not be mean.  We are at the resturant and he orders a water  (this is usually a dr pepper) and he ignores me, I try to talk to him, and ask him what's wrong and how I'm feeling...nothing.  So I ask him why he isn't listening to me...he says he doesn't wanna talk to me.  I tell him I can't be treated like this.  The waiter comes out and I order my meal, he says he doesn't want anything....well he loves steak so I tell the waiter to bring him out a steak and my ex says that he rreally doesn't want it and to not bring it out.  I ask my ex whats wrong, and by this time I was really upset....he just started playing with his straw....so i told him he can't treat me like this and if he's even listening to me.....nothing.....so, i know this was wrong, but I pinched his cheek a little harder than i intended to get his attention, that made him really mad!  So he gets up in the middle of the restaurant and says really loud "GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME YOU FU**IN B**CH" and he walks out!  So that is what broke us up.  I'm just making sure that IS a good reason to break up???  He does have very touchy feelings and gets mad over the smallest thing!  I'm just so in love with him...and I don't know if I'm just scared to be alone and that's why i want him back so bad, or if it was a stupid reason to break up with him?

[Daisy884]

I agree, its hard to see just because i'm in love with him.  So the things he does I don't see as a big deal, and that's why i was having second thoughts.  But a couple days before that, i got a coupon for dinner at two meals for $12.50.  So i took him out to that, and he decided after I paid that he didn't like the food they served so he didn't eat.  And then he got mad for no reason and told me that I was being mean because he wanted to go get my money back and I didn't want to make a scene.  so he went straight home.  I just feel like I work hard to make him happy and nothing works!  But now I feel guilty because he is being nice, but i can't give in!

[mami1323]

Of course he's being nice.  He wants you back.  But I guarantee his behavior will be on the up and up for a week or so and then he will pull that bs act on you again soon.  He's very immature and ungrateful.  You are better off without someone like that.

[Daisy884]

That's true...if I get back with him then he will just go back to his mean self after a couple months like before!

[BabyHardiman]

I have an ex husband like this.  No matter what I did he was never happy with me.  I had a car that was in perfect condition, it was paid for, it was my first piece of good credit and I was VERY proud of myself for owning it.  Anyway, his truck's lease ran out and he was unable to finance it because his credit was crappy at the time, so he was left without a vehicle.  I let him use my car to go back and forth to work with, and he griped about it the whole time.. "the car is too small", "your car smells funny", "I can't stand a standard car", "the car is burning oil", blah blah blah blah.. so when it came time to buy a new car for him, he wanted to TRADE my car in!  The dealership only wanted to give $200 for my car!!  I was in tears because he kept insisting that I needed to trade it in because it was old and ugly and was a piece of sh*t.  I said F you, i am NOT trading my car in!  In the time it took him to finally work out a deal on the SUV he was buying he by "accident" left the handbreak down on the car 2 times in three days.. my car rolled into a busy Maryland suburb street... by the grace of God no one hit the car, or was hit by it.  Just because it was mine and because he was in a lousy spot in life, he had to make me feel lousy too.  Like you whatever I did nice he found a way to make me look like an a**.  If I paid for dinner "it s*cked", if I paid for a movie "it s*cked", anything that I paid for he hated. period.  I honestly think it is some kind of chemical imbalance that blocks them from accepting and appreciating the things they are given.  

The most complicated part of my relationship was that he wanted me to throw myself at this feet and lick them if he paid for something for me.  I mean he would throw a hissy fit if I did not whale over how wonderful he was for thinking of me and appreciative for the things he did for me.  It was such an uncomfortable marriage.  Constantly walking on eggshells and constantly having to watch what you do or say... it's just not normal.

You cannot please people like this.

[Daisy884]

I can't believe that!!  Its crazy!!  I'm so scared I won't find someone I love as much as him though!  And I won't have the same feelings...and be excited to see if...and wanna be with him so much...and the same for him.

[mami1323]

You will, you always feel like that but then you move on and eventually meet someone new that you start developing those feelings for.  It takes time but your situation is still fresh.  You need to give it a chance.  It is hard but you will see as time goes by it gets easier.