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Red Marks on Penis Shaft After Quasi-Sexual Incident with Female Friend
Hello,
I have three rather large reddish spots on the shaft of my penis and am trying to rule out an STI as the cause, and in particular rule out an STI resulting from an indiscretion with a female friend involving quasi-sexual activity outside my committed relationship with my long-term girlfriend (wrong, I know).
The reddish spots are on the bottom of my penis; one near my body and two near the head. They are not painful and I don't think they're open wounds (it's a little hard to see). I discovered them a few days ago, although they might have been there longer. I discovered them exactly four weeks after the incident with my female friend.
1. Am I right that MedHelp, the community moderators, and the doctors still believe that it's only a theoretically risk of getting an STI through fingering and in reality is a non-risk? I mean here putting my fingers in a woman's vagina then touching my penis.
2. If that IS what MedHelp says, what does MedHelp say about other credible organizations who claim it is possible? Are those other organizations (like CDC, etc.) just being super-conversative? I am not criticizing anyone, I'm just trying to make sense of the differing advice on different websites.
3. Here's what happened in my incident:
a. No oral sex
b. No intercourse
c. No intentional genital touching
d. If any accidental genital touching, it was brief (and probably not where I have the sores)
e. I fingered her clit and inside her vagina and made her come
f. Without washing my hand, I pulled my genitals out of my pants and later put them back in. My fingers definitely had been in her vagina when I put myself back in my pants, and they MAY have been in her vagina when I pulled myself out of my pants (not sure about that).
g. I'm not certain if she ever touched my penis with her hands or not. If so, it was brief and not vigorous. And I'm not sure if she ever touched her own vagina that night at all (maybe, I don't know).
h. It was too dark for me to know if she had a sore/etc.
i. She is mid-50s, has good health insurance (and probably regular medical checkups). I don't know the specifics of her sexual activity but have no reason to assume she has an STI. She would not knowingly expose someone to an STI.
j. Other than this, we kissed and I sucked her nipples. That's it.
Again, I noticed the red marks a month after the incident (later than the typical 4-7 days for herpes, maybe expected time for syphillis, and i don't know much about monkey pox).
After this event, I had sex with my normal partner three times (although we had not had sex for 2-3 years). She was tight the first time and bled, so maybe that also damaged my penis a bit? On the second and third times, we used a lubricant that was sticky and I fell asleep without washing it off, so maybe I clogged pores? And more recently, I had to take a long multi-day car trip with plenty of sweating and accidently wearing too many/too warm clothes and not getting enough showers. So maybe these are all alternative explanations (and more reasonable ones)?
I think I'm a little early for testing but, if I'm right, this was essentially a zero-risk or very-low risk or only theoretical-risk encounter, am I right?
Thanks for any insight, assistance, suggestions, information, etc. Thanks to all here doing good work to help people at bad times.
I have three rather large reddish spots on the shaft of my penis and am trying to rule out an STI as the cause, and in particular rule out an STI resulting from an indiscretion with a female friend involving quasi-sexual activity outside my committed relationship with my long-term girlfriend (wrong, I know).
The reddish spots are on the bottom of my penis; one near my body and two near the head. They are not painful and I don't think they're open wounds (it's a little hard to see). I discovered them a few days ago, although they might have been there longer. I discovered them exactly four weeks after the incident with my female friend.
1. Am I right that MedHelp, the community moderators, and the doctors still believe that it's only a theoretically risk of getting an STI through fingering and in reality is a non-risk? I mean here putting my fingers in a woman's vagina then touching my penis.
2. If that IS what MedHelp says, what does MedHelp say about other credible organizations who claim it is possible? Are those other organizations (like CDC, etc.) just being super-conversative? I am not criticizing anyone, I'm just trying to make sense of the differing advice on different websites.
3. Here's what happened in my incident:
a. No oral sex
b. No intercourse
c. No intentional genital touching
d. If any accidental genital touching, it was brief (and probably not where I have the sores)
e. I fingered her clit and inside her vagina and made her come
f. Without washing my hand, I pulled my genitals out of my pants and later put them back in. My fingers definitely had been in her vagina when I put myself back in my pants, and they MAY have been in her vagina when I pulled myself out of my pants (not sure about that).
g. I'm not certain if she ever touched my penis with her hands or not. If so, it was brief and not vigorous. And I'm not sure if she ever touched her own vagina that night at all (maybe, I don't know).
h. It was too dark for me to know if she had a sore/etc.
i. She is mid-50s, has good health insurance (and probably regular medical checkups). I don't know the specifics of her sexual activity but have no reason to assume she has an STI. She would not knowingly expose someone to an STI.
j. Other than this, we kissed and I sucked her nipples. That's it.
Again, I noticed the red marks a month after the incident (later than the typical 4-7 days for herpes, maybe expected time for syphillis, and i don't know much about monkey pox).
After this event, I had sex with my normal partner three times (although we had not had sex for 2-3 years). She was tight the first time and bled, so maybe that also damaged my penis a bit? On the second and third times, we used a lubricant that was sticky and I fell asleep without washing it off, so maybe I clogged pores? And more recently, I had to take a long multi-day car trip with plenty of sweating and accidently wearing too many/too warm clothes and not getting enough showers. So maybe these are all alternative explanations (and more reasonable ones)?
I think I'm a little early for testing but, if I'm right, this was essentially a zero-risk or very-low risk or only theoretical-risk encounter, am I right?
Thanks for any insight, assistance, suggestions, information, etc. Thanks to all here doing good work to help people at bad times.
COMMUNITY LEADER
You had no risk for anything.
Fingering is no risk. The CDC is super cautious on everything, and they assume that all your partners have the infection they are talking about. Most people won't.
They have to cover their butts, so to speak, so they deal in theoretical risk.
Touching yourself after touching her is also no risk.
I don't know what the red marks are. You aren't at risk for syphilis, and syphilis requires direct contact with a sore, which you didn't have.
Let a doctor look at the spots if you are concerned, especially if they linger.
Fingering is no risk. The CDC is super cautious on everything, and they assume that all your partners have the infection they are talking about. Most people won't.
They have to cover their butts, so to speak, so they deal in theoretical risk.
Touching yourself after touching her is also no risk.
I don't know what the red marks are. You aren't at risk for syphilis, and syphilis requires direct contact with a sore, which you didn't have.
Let a doctor look at the spots if you are concerned, especially if they linger.
2 Comments
Thanks, AuntJessie. What you said above makes sense to me and helped ease my anxiety, at least a bit. I wasn't nervous about the incident at all after it happened, based on the minimal activity and risk, but got caught off guard when I saw the (not at all subtle, though not painful or itchy) red marks on my penis.
I appreciate your help. Thanks for what you do and have a good one.
I appreciate your help. Thanks for what you do and have a good one.
You're welcome. :)
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You are reading content posted in the STDs / STIs Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
