dark time for me

[whom1372]

I'm certain its an STI. After a week of just burning urination I notice a few spots of blood on toilet paper after wiping. Now I actually experience this before (the blod) and was cleared by a doc. This was years ago. I've also experience the burning but never for this long. All from receiving oral sex just over a month ago. I'm terrified. Not for myself but my family. I have to wait till Monday to get tested for the quickest results. I'm avoiding any sex currently. She knows something is up. I have been quiet and down. I'd tell her now but I want to tell her when I know definetly what's wrong. She's in school and this is the last thing she needs. My son will loose his parents harmony. I'm so devastated. Its my fault not gods, and I did this to myself. I have a perfect family and I'm counting down to its destruction at my hands. Hate doesn't describe the contempt for myself. My wife held my hand tonight and smiled at me, all I could think is "in a few days it will only be hatred in those gorgeous loving eyes for me , I'll deserve it. I have no chance, none. I just hope my boy will always love me but after what he's about to go through I don't know. You should see him, he's so happy.

Someone out there please don't hate me. If one person could not hate me I might make it through this. Time to pull the trigger on the bottle.

[whom1372]

For responding. If I have an infection I have to tell my wife, she may have contracted it. I am so lost and in despair. I want her love but don't deserve it. I could never let her live with something like that. If its vaginal she could become sterile. She deserves better even if its not me. I love my family. God help me I love them and I pray I get the chance this is not an sti so I can learn and make it up as long as I live. Hope for my family not me.

[Fleetwood20]

STIs from oral sex are incredibly rare. Get the pee test for STIs and plain old UTIs.

Increase your water intake significantly. Maybe some cranberry juice.

If you have something, then it is likely that a single tablet will knock it off, a week of antibiotics at most.

Yes, slap on the head, not a smart move. You can make it through the next week without your wife finding out. If this was a stupid one off, think about what you want in life, you have the option to be the father and husband that befits your perfect family.