Aa
19 free from Oxcodone, but.....
My anxiety is off the charts the last two days. Have been trying to taper down on the clonazapam. Only started using it 3 days into detox. Was taking 2....2-1/2. Tapered to 1-1/2 over the last week. Now down to I can't even leave the house. Went to the Dollar Store with my daughter to get some things for her and the my grandaughter. I couldn't hack it. Had to get out....I was almost yelling at her to get the DAMN STUFF so we could leave. Just wanted to get back here to my house. Is this post detox or from tapering the Klonapin...?
.I mean what the @#$%?! Days 7 thru 15 I was really feeling good. Now I'm a wreck. Smoking like a chimney....and REALLY wanting something to take the edge off. almost panic attack level. a drink would be nice but I quit that crap 2 years ago. No desire to go back. I swear it's good I got no access to opiates right now because I would use. Not even gonna lie. I might be an a$$hole but I'm an honest one.....SMH...Discouraged, and that's putting it kindly.
Peace
.I mean what the @#$%?! Days 7 thru 15 I was really feeling good. Now I'm a wreck. Smoking like a chimney....and REALLY wanting something to take the edge off. almost panic attack level. a drink would be nice but I quit that crap 2 years ago. No desire to go back. I swear it's good I got no access to opiates right now because I would use. Not even gonna lie. I might be an a$$hole but I'm an honest one.....SMH...Discouraged, and that's putting it kindly.
Peace
Best Answer
Thanks to all for the support and suggestions. I am going to try the Clondadine and taper off the Klonalin. I have only been using it daily for 2 1/2 weeks. Wish I would have never touched the crap.
nursegirl - I only use the breathing technique during panic episodes and to learn to breath properly. I need to retrain my breathing....to breathe thru my nose and use my diaphragm. Somewhere along the line I became a chest and mouth breather (I do have allergies) Let me explain my breathing problem. It's a cyclical thing and maladaptive behavior. Sleep resets my breathing so in the a.m. I am fine. I can get that deep sigh. But then I start thinking about it and I need another.....and another....and I'll continue this till suddenly I can't. Then I'll try to yawn...if that doesn't work I begin to feel breathless and panic, which of course exacerbates it. I try harder....my chest feel like there is a belt strapped around it.
It's like I am ADDICTED to that full, satisfying breath. I get one and I MUST have another! I sigh and yawn all day long. And it all stated one morning on the way to work when I couldn't yawn. Before that I was an avg stressed out, but otherwise normal, happy guy with a great family and an awesome job. I rarely even thought about my breathing. Now I'm a wreck. Trying to sell of stuff like my horse and my firebird (my prized possession btw) to keep paying the bills.
My greatest hope was that this was all related to the pain pills....and would disappear after I got clean. I was dead wrong. A good workout on the treadmill will make me feel better but it comes and goes. One moment it is effortless....the next it is impossible. So frustrating. I am almost at the end of that proverbial rope. I see no end and no way of fixing it. And I dwell on it almost every waking minute.. Does any of this make sense? Anyway, thanks as always for the help.
Getting a full breath....my new addiction....god I'm hopeless.
Jimi
nursegirl - I only use the breathing technique during panic episodes and to learn to breath properly. I need to retrain my breathing....to breathe thru my nose and use my diaphragm. Somewhere along the line I became a chest and mouth breather (I do have allergies) Let me explain my breathing problem. It's a cyclical thing and maladaptive behavior. Sleep resets my breathing so in the a.m. I am fine. I can get that deep sigh. But then I start thinking about it and I need another.....and another....and I'll continue this till suddenly I can't. Then I'll try to yawn...if that doesn't work I begin to feel breathless and panic, which of course exacerbates it. I try harder....my chest feel like there is a belt strapped around it.
It's like I am ADDICTED to that full, satisfying breath. I get one and I MUST have another! I sigh and yawn all day long. And it all stated one morning on the way to work when I couldn't yawn. Before that I was an avg stressed out, but otherwise normal, happy guy with a great family and an awesome job. I rarely even thought about my breathing. Now I'm a wreck. Trying to sell of stuff like my horse and my firebird (my prized possession btw) to keep paying the bills.
My greatest hope was that this was all related to the pain pills....and would disappear after I got clean. I was dead wrong. A good workout on the treadmill will make me feel better but it comes and goes. One moment it is effortless....the next it is impossible. So frustrating. I am almost at the end of that proverbial rope. I see no end and no way of fixing it. And I dwell on it almost every waking minute.. Does any of this make sense? Anyway, thanks as always for the help.
Getting a full breath....my new addiction....god I'm hopeless.
Jimi
I wanted to post a clarification, so there's no confusion.
Jimi, I would never suggest you stop your pursed lip breathing all together...I'm not sure how frequently you do that, if it's only when the panic has climixed, or if you immediately employ that technique when you start feeling anxiety elevate.
My suggestion was more for the cases when you're starting to feel that anxiety getting worse. If you are doing to pursed lip breathing right away, my suggestion is to perhaps try some distraction instead for a while, versus jumping into that right away.
Understand that there are lots of different theories behind techniques for anxiety treatment. There is validity to all of them, and a lot of times it ends up being what works best for that person. I just know that indeed, something like controlled breathing causes a person to concentrate and focus on the breathing itself, which for some people, can exacerbate anxiety.
I know that many times on the anxiety forum, we've made similar suggestions (in similar circumstances)...and a lot of the people who tried some changes in their technique, relying a little less on the breathing techniques, noticed some improvements in their anxiety. The biggest report was that the anxiety didn't continue to worsen as much as it had been...and also, people reported that their breathing symptoms were less troublesome after a few weeks of making some adjustments to their coping mechanisms.
Anyway...just wanted to clarify. I didn't want anyone thinking I meant for Jimi to completely change what he's been doing! It was just a recommendation. :0)
Jimi, I would never suggest you stop your pursed lip breathing all together...I'm not sure how frequently you do that, if it's only when the panic has climixed, or if you immediately employ that technique when you start feeling anxiety elevate.
My suggestion was more for the cases when you're starting to feel that anxiety getting worse. If you are doing to pursed lip breathing right away, my suggestion is to perhaps try some distraction instead for a while, versus jumping into that right away.
Understand that there are lots of different theories behind techniques for anxiety treatment. There is validity to all of them, and a lot of times it ends up being what works best for that person. I just know that indeed, something like controlled breathing causes a person to concentrate and focus on the breathing itself, which for some people, can exacerbate anxiety.
I know that many times on the anxiety forum, we've made similar suggestions (in similar circumstances)...and a lot of the people who tried some changes in their technique, relying a little less on the breathing techniques, noticed some improvements in their anxiety. The biggest report was that the anxiety didn't continue to worsen as much as it had been...and also, people reported that their breathing symptoms were less troublesome after a few weeks of making some adjustments to their coping mechanisms.
Anyway...just wanted to clarify. I didn't want anyone thinking I meant for Jimi to completely change what he's been doing! It was just a recommendation. :0)
YES nursegirl. WE do put our bodys threw alot of STRESS when we go threw our detox Don,t we??. I like what is said. I always remember all the years I used is only short time to get better. Someone once told me in the beginning take the pain, anxiety, ect ect. and remember it before you pick up that substance to use again. They say the second time around for w/d are even worse??? Everyone always told me too BREATH...
God be with us all!!!!
vickie
God be with us all!!!!
vickie
I hear you for sure! I'm only 5 days but my anxiety is pretty out of control. I'm not sure what to do about it, but am glad I am not using. I called my dr and let him know but havent heard back. keep posting, and let me know if you find anything that works!
Anxiety wise, you've got a bit of a double whammy going on. Both the detox off the opiates, and the weaning down off the Klonopin will cause an increase in anxiety. Like sarah said, this is only temporary, it WILL get better, it will just take some time. I think trying the Clonodine is a good idea, I think it would at least take the edge off a bit.
ANYTHING you can do to get your mind off the way you're feeling would be a huge help. The more we sit and think about how our anxiety feels, the worse the sensation is.
I know you said that your anxiety/panic comes in the form of the breathing difficulties (which is actually a very common symptom). While the breathing excercises are commonly recommended (ie the pursed lip breathing)...I'm a firm believer that those kinds of exercises can actually intensify the symptoms, because it makes you focus more on your breathing. I think the LESS you focus on it, the better. That's just my opinion, everyone is different, and certainly, if you feel that works for you, then that's good...just some food for thought. It wouldn't hurt to TRY to skip the exercises for a day and see if you notice any difference.
Just keep reassuring yourself that FEAR is NOT FACT. The FACT is, your breathing is okay, you are not in danger, or anything of the sort...it is your perception thanks to that bast**d anxiety. Fear can cause us to feel such intense physical sensations, to the point where we would think we're having a heart attack. Those are JUST sensations, as awful and as scary as they are, they will not harm you.
Best to you...sure hope you get to feeling better soon. Feel free to post on the anxiety forum as well, if you need some extra support. Sometimes, even just reading the threads, realizing how many people feel the same way, can be so reassuring and comforting.
ANYTHING you can do to get your mind off the way you're feeling would be a huge help. The more we sit and think about how our anxiety feels, the worse the sensation is.
I know you said that your anxiety/panic comes in the form of the breathing difficulties (which is actually a very common symptom). While the breathing excercises are commonly recommended (ie the pursed lip breathing)...I'm a firm believer that those kinds of exercises can actually intensify the symptoms, because it makes you focus more on your breathing. I think the LESS you focus on it, the better. That's just my opinion, everyone is different, and certainly, if you feel that works for you, then that's good...just some food for thought. It wouldn't hurt to TRY to skip the exercises for a day and see if you notice any difference.
Just keep reassuring yourself that FEAR is NOT FACT. The FACT is, your breathing is okay, you are not in danger, or anything of the sort...it is your perception thanks to that bast**d anxiety. Fear can cause us to feel such intense physical sensations, to the point where we would think we're having a heart attack. Those are JUST sensations, as awful and as scary as they are, they will not harm you.
Best to you...sure hope you get to feeling better soon. Feel free to post on the anxiety forum as well, if you need some extra support. Sometimes, even just reading the threads, realizing how many people feel the same way, can be so reassuring and comforting.
Jim, this is a s***storm roller coaster isn't it? Day 27 for me, and ups and downs this week...a few really bad days followed by a great one yesterday. I hate it, never knowing what you'll wake up to, but you've done so great this far. Have been reading your posts, and you've helped all of us with your honesty...hang in there and know that tomorrow can be a better day....you are soooo worth having the feel-good days! I am rooting for you...you have a ton of support here...just vent to us when you need to!
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Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
people get that confused out here.It is non-addictive does not get to the pleasure brain or mess with the chem/transmitter I call them. OH yes I live 50 miles from the canada border and I have LOTS of MOOSE in my yard every winter. They are so differnt looking. I have had alot of experience getting out of there way or when driving down my dirt road you have to wait until they move. If you beep they will charge. We have lots of other animals dear, elk, bear, ect it is Gods land up here if you can survie the snow. One yr we had 6-7 feet The satalite was under the snow. I might put a picture in my profile. Anyway keep posting you will get over it all as you know.
God Bless
vickie