Aa
day 10? 11? something like that!!! WHOOP WHOOP
well i am at day 11 i think:) i lost count since 'days" are not my focus anymore since i have been feeling great!!! if you are struggling please please keep pushing it is a rough couple days but worth it.. i used for a extra 2 months ONLY out of fear of the w d it wasn't even as bad as i worked it up to be... just wanted to write in quick and say i am still CLEAN and HAPPIER than ever... i am back to where i was when i was clean for over 3 years.. i had a procedure scheduled tomorrow and since it isn't life or death and would require taking pain pills i cancelled it!!!! before i was looking for a reason now i could have had one and cancelled it couldn't be prouder!!! all thanks and glory to God of coarse!! on the second note i just wanted to mention i started taking this all natural supplement for weight loss and energy some people don't need to loose and they take it for the energy and just eat more so they don't lose weight... u can private message me about it because i know this is a substanse abuse forum and that is why i am here too but i wanted to share w anyone looking for clean, energy and/or weight loss... i have lost 18 lbs in 6 weeks and i really believe it helped me w my w d i was out mowing my lawn on day 3 and 4!!!! i believe in it so much i started selling them as i have a BUNCH of unhealthy people in my life and people who suffer from energy loss, depression, anxiety, etc.. people have come off their meds and it has even been recommended by dr's.. there r a couple people on here trying them as i have shipped them out to them... didn't i say i wasn't gonna go on and on... lol anyway... if u want to know more or want to have a sample sent to you or even a small trial order message me!!! i really feel great and being clean on top of it AMAZING.. we have damaged our bodies now we have to treat them right!!!!!
mary, kyle, ibkleen THANKS so much for your great words i actually laughed out loud!!!! i really do feel great i feel so proud of myself and i really thank you all on here because i have been reading on this site daily and even if i don't comment it is really a inspiration to me and to many others on here!! i believe this site is really helping people and that is a awsome thing!!! great job everyone and keep pushing forward being clean there is nothing better!!! Catuf thanks for sharing that story it was really good... i totally understand the one day at a time... but i agree until u REALLY get that it can be a relapse waiting to happen for any of us i think!!!! thanks again everyone and many blessings to everyone:)
congrats on hitting double-digits!!
it is my experience that when i quit keeping each day as my focus, i end up back on day-1. i see the same thing with others in recovery -- those who do it one-day-at-a-time, just keep doing it and their days turn into weeks, then months, then years, then decades.
more importantly, once they get past early recovery, they don't struggle one-day-at-a-time, they live a free and abundant life one-day-at-a-time.
in the first month of my last rehab i was talking to a counselor about life-after-rehab. she asked me "why are you so afraid of relapsing?"
that was easy . . . i told her "because i always do . . . sooner or later i always relapse" (and that was the truth, i always relapsed -- i'd quit with the most sincere and heart-felt desire to quit forever, but there i'd be a few days, a few weeks, or a couple of months down the road back to using and stuck in the same rut as before).
she asked me "are you going to use today?"
i remember being unable to stifle an audible sigh, because i was worried about something serious and here she was starting up with this one-day-at-a-time nonsense (a solution for idiots if i had ever heard one). but i told her "no, i'm not going to use today . . ."
she cut me off before i could explain why today wasn't the issue, "how do you know? how do you know you won't use today?"
again i answered her honestly, if impatiently: "i don't know how i know, but i know . . . i'm going to make to bed without using . . . ."
"are you sure? are you sure you're not going to use today, no matter what?"
"yes, i'm sure, but you don't understand . . . today's not the issue -- sooner or later . . ."
"NO," she interrupted, YOU don't understand. all you have is TODAY and if you're not going to use TODAY, then you're doing everything that recovery requires."
i had a history of failed recovery and i had heard "one-day-at-a-time" a thousand time, but this time it hit me like a ton of bricks. suddenly i GOT IT and i saw that it wasn't some meaningless nothing, it was everything. i was just stunned and i said "oh my god, do you mean that when you guys say 'one day at a time,' you really mean one-day-at-a-time?"
she knew i got it, and smiling, she said "yeah, we really mean it."
that moment made all the difference for me. prior to that moment i was a relapse wating to happen. a hope to stay clean, dipped in the fear of failure that never failed to appear. i was failure.
suddenly, i was success . . . i was doing everything that recovery required. with my focus entirely on today, i was a success as long as i didn't use today. it didn't matter what i would or wouldn't do tomorrow, today was the ticket and i was not going to use today.
becoming a success instead of a failure-waiting-to-happen was a game changer. i became dedicated to today. "stay clean today, no matter what," that was the goal . . . make it through the day and get to bed without using at all. if i felt like i might break down tomorrow or next week, so what -- that didn't count and it didn't matter. my only job was to not-use today.
these days, my job is to work on my recovery one-day-at-a-time. i can't work on my recovery tomorrow, or next week, i can only work on my recovery today.
if i keep doing that, i can stay in the light, which is a good place to be.
CATUF
2626
it is my experience that when i quit keeping each day as my focus, i end up back on day-1. i see the same thing with others in recovery -- those who do it one-day-at-a-time, just keep doing it and their days turn into weeks, then months, then years, then decades.
more importantly, once they get past early recovery, they don't struggle one-day-at-a-time, they live a free and abundant life one-day-at-a-time.
in the first month of my last rehab i was talking to a counselor about life-after-rehab. she asked me "why are you so afraid of relapsing?"
that was easy . . . i told her "because i always do . . . sooner or later i always relapse" (and that was the truth, i always relapsed -- i'd quit with the most sincere and heart-felt desire to quit forever, but there i'd be a few days, a few weeks, or a couple of months down the road back to using and stuck in the same rut as before).
she asked me "are you going to use today?"
i remember being unable to stifle an audible sigh, because i was worried about something serious and here she was starting up with this one-day-at-a-time nonsense (a solution for idiots if i had ever heard one). but i told her "no, i'm not going to use today . . ."
she cut me off before i could explain why today wasn't the issue, "how do you know? how do you know you won't use today?"
again i answered her honestly, if impatiently: "i don't know how i know, but i know . . . i'm going to make to bed without using . . . ."
"are you sure? are you sure you're not going to use today, no matter what?"
"yes, i'm sure, but you don't understand . . . today's not the issue -- sooner or later . . ."
"NO," she interrupted, YOU don't understand. all you have is TODAY and if you're not going to use TODAY, then you're doing everything that recovery requires."
i had a history of failed recovery and i had heard "one-day-at-a-time" a thousand time, but this time it hit me like a ton of bricks. suddenly i GOT IT and i saw that it wasn't some meaningless nothing, it was everything. i was just stunned and i said "oh my god, do you mean that when you guys say 'one day at a time,' you really mean one-day-at-a-time?"
she knew i got it, and smiling, she said "yeah, we really mean it."
that moment made all the difference for me. prior to that moment i was a relapse wating to happen. a hope to stay clean, dipped in the fear of failure that never failed to appear. i was failure.
suddenly, i was success . . . i was doing everything that recovery required. with my focus entirely on today, i was a success as long as i didn't use today. it didn't matter what i would or wouldn't do tomorrow, today was the ticket and i was not going to use today.
becoming a success instead of a failure-waiting-to-happen was a game changer. i became dedicated to today. "stay clean today, no matter what," that was the goal . . . make it through the day and get to bed without using at all. if i felt like i might break down tomorrow or next week, so what -- that didn't count and it didn't matter. my only job was to not-use today.
these days, my job is to work on my recovery one-day-at-a-time. i can't work on my recovery tomorrow, or next week, i can only work on my recovery today.
if i keep doing that, i can stay in the light, which is a good place to be.
CATUF
2626
WHOOP WHOOP - heck yeah! I can't express how proud I am of you. Happy for you. Everything. Words escape me (unusual). You are an inspiration. Enjoy your accomplishment. Many, many congratulations.
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