Aa
Not sure if I'm supposed to be here????
well it's been a little over a month since I took my last pill. I say pill cause I would take anything I got my hands on called an out paitent program they put me on suboxone I see them 2 times a week and have cell # to call if need be I just feel so alone !!!!! very scattered today I just hope I'm at the right place I know many think I'm not even in recovery but I feel as though I am and really just need some feed back and a place were I can find some exceptance I hope that there r people here that can help me with the many ???? I have thanks
You aren't alone......we're here. And I'm with you on the minute to minute days lately. I'm a huge emotional mess lately.....I read the health pages on PAWS and understand myself better. The over-reactions to what seems miniscule....... after the fact......the stress that builds up in my chest and my brain when I hit one wall and slam into another....my heart rate freaks, the elephant in my chest won't move for awhile! I feel like I'm really CRAZY when that's going on! I AM comforted by what the article says about PAWS which I didn't understand before....and my clean time is in that 3-6 mos stage where it can hit hard. I just couldn't understand what was going on inside of me?? I had my hubby read it (the PAWS article(s), but it doesn't help at that moment (or many moments, ha) when I'm freakin out and hurtin his feelings! He knows WHY.....I know WHY......but you still have to LIVE THRU IT and come out on the other side WITHOUT USING!!!!
GEESH!!! I can do this....I can do this.....and YOU can TOO, ANN!!
We're gonna have some better days comin up......we will.
So what if you get an F on your outpatient assignment......LOL! It takes two to complete the assignment.......and your therapist knows you can't force your hubby to participate (at least I hope he/she does ha!)
Thanks for the job update......you sound like you are keepin on keepin on!
The hard thing for me about that "keepin on" crap.....is when the blockers tackle me time and time again. I can't seem to find that "endurance" I used to have. I just keep saying....this too shall pass....and it better LOL!
Hugs to you, girl~~
GEESH!!! I can do this....I can do this.....and YOU can TOO, ANN!!
We're gonna have some better days comin up......we will.
So what if you get an F on your outpatient assignment......LOL! It takes two to complete the assignment.......and your therapist knows you can't force your hubby to participate (at least I hope he/she does ha!)
Thanks for the job update......you sound like you are keepin on keepin on!
The hard thing for me about that "keepin on" crap.....is when the blockers tackle me time and time again. I can't seem to find that "endurance" I used to have. I just keep saying....this too shall pass....and it better LOL!
Hugs to you, girl~~
I swear I should never post on here early in the morning my day goes right in the pooper. my therapist gave me homework to do which included my husband. well lets just say I'm going to be getting an F we're suposed to be talking for a half an hour a day no fight issues just to try to reconect..... well he is not involved in this at all I'm full of all sorts of emotions non that are good right now talk about taking it minute by minute this isn't one day at a time not living with this klan. I start out with the best intentions and all the sudden I feel like I'm on one of those shooting ranges and I'm the clay pigone being shot at today if it wasn't for this site and thank God for it I'd be alone well thanks for reading
well job interview was a bust it was funny though I,m in a good and busy place the holidays r right around the coner which I can't belive and I have been calling my therapist But most important I'm doing I't CLEAN !!!!! what a great feeling and I do have another interview on Monday I'll get something when God say's it's time I'm doing my work on my end and that all I can do right walk walk walk he'll let we know when it's time I have 100 percent faith in that thanks for the prays they always help I pray for everyone on this site. I just find it hard to belive that for today this minute I'm doing it guys and gals I never would have thought this possable thanks for the support !!!!
Hey, Ann!! What time is the interview tomorrow morning? You'll do just
wunnerful......you afterall were asked to come back and talk to the big boss!
All the way there......play positive music or talk to yourself (ha!)
Many, many yrs back when I was interviewing for an outside sales position in a field I had previously been a purchasing agent in.....I was just scared to death....I had never been in outside sales. I talked to myself and repeated positive, good, things over and over. Don't turn on that negative tape in your head and focus on how nervous you are, Ann. You'll do just fabulous! (oh yeah, I got the job, worked in a 5 state area for 13 yrs and absolutely LOVED that end of the business.....face to face.....not on the phone)
Hope you are going to meetings when you get blue like last week. AND will get on here like you finally did.....and please...."bother" your therapist, Ann OK? LOL!
I'll be anxious to hear the outcome of your interview.
("I CAN DO THIS.....I'M GONNA LAND THIS JOB......I AM QUALIFIED AND ABLE AND CLEAN!!!!!!"
Look forward to hearing from you tomorrow.....I'll be prayin for you!!
Go get 'em girl~~
wunnerful......you afterall were asked to come back and talk to the big boss!
All the way there......play positive music or talk to yourself (ha!)
Many, many yrs back when I was interviewing for an outside sales position in a field I had previously been a purchasing agent in.....I was just scared to death....I had never been in outside sales. I talked to myself and repeated positive, good, things over and over. Don't turn on that negative tape in your head and focus on how nervous you are, Ann. You'll do just fabulous! (oh yeah, I got the job, worked in a 5 state area for 13 yrs and absolutely LOVED that end of the business.....face to face.....not on the phone)
Hope you are going to meetings when you get blue like last week. AND will get on here like you finally did.....and please...."bother" your therapist, Ann OK? LOL!
I'll be anxious to hear the outcome of your interview.
("I CAN DO THIS.....I'M GONNA LAND THIS JOB......I AM QUALIFIED AND ABLE AND CLEAN!!!!!!"
Look forward to hearing from you tomorrow.....I'll be prayin for you!!
Go get 'em girl~~
Well I hope you get the job! Ive learned in the past two months that its a great thing to keep yourself busy. Hope your day is going good so far! And dont freak out about the Holidays...Think of it as a new beginning!
feeling better today getting nevous about the interview tomorrow I hope it goes well would be great to get out and make some much needed money before the holidays I can't belive they are right around the conner that's scary well now that I freaked myself out going to see how the rest of the people are doind on here today
well it's sunday uhg that being said I'm alive and here this time change has me all messed up I've been so down the last couple of days and I couldn't put my finger on it . then it came to me, I haven't checked in with this wounderful site got so trapped in pleasing everyone else I forgot about my self ..... I hope everyone had a safe and happy halloween and madeit through sandy all is fine here from that thank God but got to give the storm it's due it gave us quite a show . and your right ImDoneNoMore I'm itching to get to this interview I hope again all is well with everyone.
Definitely get busy!! It will help distract you from your thoughts and then you'll have the added benefit of accomplishing something. And it always feels really good to look around at a clean home and see the benefits of your hard work.
You can do this - it's just a week - a short time in the grand scheme of things. And look at it this way, you'll be another week stronger by the time you get to that interview!
You can do this - it's just a week - a short time in the grand scheme of things. And look at it this way, you'll be another week stronger by the time you get to that interview!
well it looks like I made it through the storm however the changed my job interview for next week on tuesday. I really wish I could Just get in there today I'd drive through anything to start working. I guess I'll be working on patients for the next week and try to stay busy around my house maybe this time it will stay clean. I can feel the anxitey kick in so I best get moving other wise it just get worst I hope everyone on the east coast in doing ok praying for ya.
u always come up with the best ideas ur right we would have a good time see to every negitive theres a positive hope u and your's r safe you'll be in my thoughts and prays
hi I don't know about sub wd. I can tell u from my experiance that if you don't get into some kind of treatment then u r at risk for abusing suboxone and from what I understand the withdraws r bad, that being said if u get into a treatment out or inpaitient suboxone can be helpful first with withdrawls and second getting you to start getting involved in ur treatment. it is not the end all save all again from my experiance with the suboxone it has saved my life it has gotten me to therapy and learning the tools i need to stay alive I have never abused sub I take as I'm told to and the doc and therapst have a plane of cars inplace for me and that is what I'm doing and it's working for me when it comes time I will be very slowly tapper off as a dr.orders I abused druges before I want to work on my addiction and this is what is working for me today please let me know what u decide.and I hope I was helpful and if u have tried the cold turkey and it hasn't worked this might be something you want to try best of luck you are in my prays.
Hope we don't lose you during the worst of the storm......but you know what I just thought of?
TWO teenagers without their cell phones and computers LOL!!! It might just be a God ordained opportunity...ha! Playing cards or board games "like the ole days" would really bond you in a new way with your kiddos and them with each other.....and them with you! How great would that be? And just think.....it wouldn't be "mom" suggesting it?
You might even belly laugh with them:)
Books are so good for our imaginations, too, and sometimes we don't give ourselves permission to "just be" once in awhile. I'll keep you and yours lifted up.......be safe.
You are doing so good, Ann!!!
TWO teenagers without their cell phones and computers LOL!!! It might just be a God ordained opportunity...ha! Playing cards or board games "like the ole days" would really bond you in a new way with your kiddos and them with each other.....and them with you! How great would that be? And just think.....it wouldn't be "mom" suggesting it?
You might even belly laugh with them:)
Books are so good for our imaginations, too, and sometimes we don't give ourselves permission to "just be" once in awhile. I'll keep you and yours lifted up.......be safe.
You are doing so good, Ann!!!
my doc was pain meds in pill form and I would take fistfuls evey hour I was awake. I have alot of work to do on myself there r many resons that I self medicated. I chose the path I am on It right now today is the one I need to be on I'm comfortable with the team I am working with and all the tools that entails everyone is different and has a different story to tell . One day hopefully my friend on this site I will tell my story . I understand the many issues and feeling that people have about suboxone but for me right at this moment all I can say is it saved my life !!!! and got me in to the therapy I so truly need. dr. and the therapy team have came up with my plane of care and will be going about my treatment the best we can I hope I answered ur questions and I hope I gave you insite in to my treatment did u have an experiance with suboxone?
I seem to be in one of the many areas that r going to be hit so if u guys don't hear from me that means no power uhg and with 2 teen that don't know what to do without cells or computers I'm so scared thanks for the the post always good to hear from a friend I'll hopefully be able to be on through the whole storm this place is my life line when feeling stressed
I'm close to quitting my pain meds forever, I'm tryin to find the best route to take. I think suboxine sounds like a good choice. The reason I havnt started is I DON'T know anything about suboxine. Are the withdrawls from them as dificult as oxysh
I did not read all of the posts,nor do I lknow ur dose of pills when u quit..I am guessing it was 150 milligrams or more since ur r on sub as u dont c that often for someone at 60- 100 milligrams....not if it waas hydro or percs...if it was heroin, then yes...that would fit. Just get off sub as soon as u can..do not get addicted to that in an effort to avoid WDs from a lesser narcotic. Sub is a powerhouse....2mg of sub would satisfy most 100 mg hydro users..Be sure u know what is involved if u plan to stay on that sticky stuff for more than a month...or u will have to deal with sub WD which makes hydro WD look like a slight cold in comparison. Be safe..,Read the health pages....know all u can about what u have chosen as an alternative...and do know sub is a narcoticx and it is much stronger than most.....keep posting
So glad you checked back in......and glad the scare w/your daughter is behind both of you. Sounds like you did really good at the interview if you are MOVIN ON UP to talk to the boss!! LOL (and most important, you did this all WITHOUT using!!!)
Yes we are all in God's hands......and I shall be praying for all my MedHelp friends that live where this megastorm is headed Been reading about all the precautions taking place. Lots of factors are diff about this storm: the high winds from Sandy, cold artic air coming south from Canada, and a cold front from the West coast, and a full moon which affect tide levels in typically low lying areas. Wow!! Reminds me of the concoction of pills I used to put in my body LOL! I'm not making fun here......just trying to keep it light.....while my heart lifts you all in "storm" target areas up to God.
Blessings all~
Yes we are all in God's hands......and I shall be praying for all my MedHelp friends that live where this megastorm is headed Been reading about all the precautions taking place. Lots of factors are diff about this storm: the high winds from Sandy, cold artic air coming south from Canada, and a cold front from the West coast, and a full moon which affect tide levels in typically low lying areas. Wow!! Reminds me of the concoction of pills I used to put in my body LOL! I'm not making fun here......just trying to keep it light.....while my heart lifts you all in "storm" target areas up to God.
Blessings all~
haven't been hear in a couple days everything is going good for me and daughter scare is over thank GOD and I have to go back on tuesday to meet and do an interview with the boss so I hope I get it any money now would be helpful. today just keeping busy with hobbies : ) and so vincent price movies lol I'll be paying tomorrow laundry all day yuck and making rice crispy treats for the school party and carve the pumpkin that this Frankenstorm their talking about will probablly blow away in 2 seconds flat.oh well it's in Gods hands Hope everyone liven on the east coast stays safe.
ann - I absolutely LOVE your attitude. Love it. :) (you're going to be great at your interview)
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