Need support

[Sharon0255]

I am going to try on go cold turkey again tomorrow using a variation of the Thomas recipe and I'm scared and alone   I am on 50 to 60 mg of oxycodone and can't take one more minute of this hell I did this a month ago and made it 8 days and went back please I really need support. I have taken Monday off and my husband is home and not working right now so I'm going to say it's the flu. I am so disappointed in myself. I was sober for a long time and was diagnosed with breast cancer in 09 had a total mastectomy and chemotherapy and here I am I have come off these at least ten times in 2 hrs and everyone in my family is in recovery and I've been able to hide this. The worst part is my youngest son just came clean with his habit and here I am lying this is killing me. My son has 28 days. I'm crying as I write this praying someone responds I'm in rough shape. I have enough pills and see the Dr on Tuesday. If I don't do it now I have 2 weeks off from work in December and I could do it then but I'm afraid something really bad is right around the corner I've been reading these boards for a month the last time I detoxed all these posts helped so much but because I have not joined the community I had no encouragement last time I detoxed. My question is can someone please support me through this I don't feel strong like I did last time. I took high doses of Valium and it wasn't that bad but my habit was less and I stabilized for awhile at 40 mg. Sorry I'm going on and on it's thanksgiving and I'm cooking for my family and feel like a piece of crap.

[Sharon0255]

I am o. Day 3 and need to cut back my Valium and Ambien. I kicked benzos back in May and don't want to get hooked again everyone says iy takes more than a week. I started the Ambien a few months ago for the side effects from the chemotherapy drugs. Is it a bad withdrawal off Ambien? Sorry I have so many questions I'm just scared. I'm taking 50 to 60 mg of Valium. So depressed can I take the 5 http yet?

[Sharon0255]

Day three and I'm not sure if I can do this. I was awake all night and finally txt my friend who has my stuff. I scammed last night for hours how this was the wrong time do it after next script. I hate myself please help me. I talked to my son and pretty much told him the truth he doesn't know I'm detoxing now he has 28 days first try ever and he's 29 told me to stop judging I was an awesome sober mother his whole life.
Sorry I'm rambling I've been taking to much Valium and Ambien haven't take. Any yet today need to ween off today and not get the pills. Got on my knees and asked God please one minute at a time I want my life back. I have so much to do and can't really move from wd and Valium.

Should I start taking the supplements tryosine 5 http? Anyone here heard of Arnica or Melissa? So hard to post but I'm trying to save my life with your help oh yea what time zone is this board?

[avisg]

yes plz do not mix Valium and a ambien.Not to mention they are both really addicting I know sleep is one of the worst parts but the best thing is try to just push threw .Exercise even if its just walking will help get the receptors working again on there own.Hang in there it will get better.

[ImDONENoMore]

oops - meant oxy's not vics - course that's kind of like potato potaHto right?  lol

[ImDONENoMore]

gnarly's right - don't let the "all or nothing" thing screw you up - we put a lot of pressure on ourselves when we first quit and that's not always a good thing.

Giving up the vics is a great start - now focus on slowly weaning off the sleep meds and the valium (which you're supposed to taper anyway) - sharon, this isn't a race - you'll get there if you stop to think about what your ultimate goal is.  To get off all the drugs for good.

You can get there just give yourself a fighting chance.  You are NOT losing this battle - you just need to get there slowly and safely.  And gnarly is absolutely right about NOT mixing the ambien and valium.  If you find you absolutely have to take something for sleep choose only ONE of those and slowly step back from each as time progresses.

[gnarly_1]

Sharon how you holding up???? just a quick check .....cant sleep yet so I thought I would see how things are going for you again please be safe with that valum it not a good idea mixing that with the z /sleep meds might not wake up at least have somone check in on you I cant make you do any thing but   you should choose one or the other its a safety thing........Gnarly