Needing advice

[ABL4ME]

I've been reading a lot of the posting in this forum on and off all day.  I've started at least 3 questions and was interrupted...I'm hoping to get this one through :)  My situation is very similar to many here.  I started taking prescription pain meds in December 2006.  To date, I take over 15 pills a day because of my tolerance.  Long story short, I had a long talk with my specialist yesterday.  She pulled my pharmacy records, which dated back to 2006.  I was shocked, embarrassed and very defensive.  After sleeping on her advice, I decided she was absolutely right, I need to stop taking the medication NOW...regardless of my pain level.  I've known for quite sometime that I had developed a problem, however, wasn't ready to face it.  The addiction has taken over most of my life.  I can't travel unless I have enough to last for several days, I can't do a lot of things simply because I am worried about running out of my meds.  So, instead of focusing on the real problem, which is my back, I've allowed the vicoden or the vicoprofen or the percocet dictate how I go about my daily life.  I realize I am cheating myself out on so much of my life because the drug has consumed me.  I have never had a problem with alcohol or drugs, therefore, I never believed something like this could happen to me.  My specialist gave me another prescription...to taper me off.  Yea right...someone who takes over 15 pills a day is not going to take 4 a day when there is a bottle in front of them.  My decision is to go cold turkey..starting within the next 24 hrs.  In the past, I've gone 24 hours without the medication in my system...so I have a good idea what the withdrawal is going to feel like...however, I have never made it beyond that time frame.  My husband seems to think it would be a good idea to keep a few pills in the house, in case the "anxiety" from the withdrawal is too much for me to handle.  My opinion, if they are here, I am going to find them, take them and lose my battle.  Does anyone agree?  I'm here because I really appreciated how everyone is so willing to help the other out.  I am hoping someone will be able to hold my hand via Internet (lol) over the next 72+ hrs or so.  I do not "think" it will be a problem for me if I can make it past 72 hrs...simply because I am determined to get my life back...but, I am afraid of caving in because we get soooooooo sick from the withdrawals.

Any advice given is so greatly appreciated!

[ABL4ME]

Thanks so much for your support...if it wasn't for this forum I know I wouldn't have been able to do it on my own!

Take Care
~Amy

[ABL4ME]

Thank you so much!  You have been wonderful with encouragement and praise!!!  I do appreciate the B'day wishes as well!!!!...and yes, I am having a wonderful day!!!!

Keep going strong...I am right behind you as each day goes by...!!!

Love,
Amy

[Enough22]

Amy - I just left you a message, and wanted to leave you a birthday wish on your thread - Congratulations!  You've put in so much hard work these past 11 days, and I think your birthday is a great way to give you a little smile for all this hard work ..

Wishing you a wonderful day -
God Bless~
Jonathan (jms)

[wanttobeclean]

I just read through this whole post. You have done great!  You should be so proud of yourself.  Happy day 11!  I am 63 days off oxycodone and although I wouldn't wish the first 2 weeks on anyone, it was SO worth it.  I don't just have my life back...I have a much better, happier, life and can finally look myself in the mirror and feel pride.  Way to go Amy!

[ABL4ME]

Thank you and Congrats to you too, along with everyone else who working to improve their lives!!

Take care and stay strong,
Amy

HEY...I just realized a huge congrats to you on your Day 10 today!!!!!  Keep going.....

[tryinhard78]

Congrats on day 10!! Alot of people right in the same range on the forum. You have done a great job. Right behind you with day 9

~Susie