Slipped Up...

[hockeyguy83]

So I'm at around day 3ish from a 10 a day habit of Norco. Surpsigingly enough, I haven't had that bad of WD's - been using the Thomas guide, and some xanax to sleep. Not near as bad as prepared myself for, but the mental cravins are the hardest part. Nothing is as much fun as it would be with a few little yellow friends...

Some of you have been aware of my progress, however I slipped up last night. I put on some pants I haven't worn in a while, and go figure there was a little present from Satan in the pocket. It took about 2 seconds for me to make sure it found a home... right down my throat. It was a 5mg so it was such a waste as I didn't even feel anything, except guilt. I've been timing my clean time on my phone, and I reset it back to zero. It made me sick to do so. This isnt the first time this go around that I have slipped up by finding a random pill and taking it over the last week or so. I've done everything I can to make sure my house is clean of them, hopefully that is it. For you who have a lot of clean time under your belt, and I am sure that time came with some hiccups or re-starts such as mine has...

My question is, what does taking 1 pill do to the detox process? Does it start all over? I know 5mg isnt anything like the 80mg a day I was taking, but does it put me back to square one? I know that this is a mental battle at this point, and now it is just about letting my brain recover the normal chemistry. I'm just scared that I set myself back. It was stupid. It did nothing, except make me go through the rest of my laundry making sure I didn't have any left. I don't know if i did that so that I could get rid of them, or if I could find another one to take... I'm sure it was the latter...

Maybe a rant, but I'm really interested to know what triggers people to relapse, or what kind of setbacks affected your detox. I'm looking forward to the NA meeting I found next week; however I am really uncomfortable talking about it except on here. I don't know how I am going to feel looking face to face with people. A lot easier from a computer...

Disappointed, yet moving forward...

[onmyown561]

Thank you guys for the support will keep you updated!!

[VICourageous]

Time & Patience. I have to agree with DS. We need Support in any way we can get it. It will take time for your Body and Brain to adjust back. Meanwhile try to hit some of those meetings. You will be so happy you did. This will take your mind of the detox for a short time and also talking with others, who walked these shoes, is such a mind relief.

We have receptors all over and the Stomach is one place too. As these clear up you will start to feel better. Make sure you eat very healthy to get those vit/min back in you. Drink your life away with H2O right now. Pick up some of those vit/min that you can add to water. Exercise, Sun and Music will help stimulate those "Happy Chems" back up.
Be Safe!
Bless
Vickie

[dominosarah]

Relapse happens when recovery doesnt~

[gnarly_1]

He Dude your doing the deal  in a few days thing will start  to get better  keep forcing the fluids and eat light meals  even if your not hungry it will help.....................Gnarly...........................

[Punkprincess777]

You got this .. Your almost there .. It gets better! Tomorrow is a new day with less withdrawl symptoms.. You should really see improvements about the 10 day mark. Try a hot shower or bath those helped me so much.

[hockeyguy83]

Still here. Today has been the worst so far. Stomach feels like it turned inside out, and haven't been able to get off the couch all day. Still trying to stay strong, its been a week tomorrow since I started this process... looking forward to getting better soon.

[Punkprincess777]

How ya doing today ? Keep posting. Keep us updated.

[Cricketk92]

Hi Hockey!  You got some great answers above!  And I have to agree that it has been 12 step meetings that have helped me for the last 364 days!  I muddled around the first month I was clean so I understand when you say online is easier!  I even went to online AA meetings so I didnt have to do face to face!  I still go to the online meetings almost everyday but there is something about going  in person that makes it more real!  And relapse happens!  Taking a pill shouldn't have a effect on your detox!  At least not physically!  Try not to stay disappointed in yourself....  that can lead to another relapse f you stay focused there!  Be proud of you!  You have made the decision to stop and are doing something about it!!!  That alone is awesome!!!  Every day we have clean is a miracle!!!  Hang in there and let us know how the NA meeting goes!!!  ♡

[meegWpaw]

hg, its ok, it happens a lot.  i relapsed time and time again as long as i had access to pills.  for a while after i first tried to get clean there were a LOT around the house for various reasons.  while that was going on, forget it.  i even found pills that someone hid from me and took them.  12 step has been really good for me, though I went to a lot of meetings before i found some i liked, and i mean a lot.  good luck, don't give up!

[jifmoc]

Hockey- you got the absolute spot on advice from my 2 pals above. I want to echo what Madman wrote because that jumped out at me, too. Go to a meeting now not next week. As addicts, we procrastinate everything except drug taking. And like was said above, your brain won't change or improve if you don't change or improve. That means, getting out of your comfort zone.

All you need to do is walk in there and sit down. That's it. You don't have to run a marathon or look for your next wife. Just sit down and raise your hand when they ask if there are any newcomers. I know there are meetings near you tomorrow and/or next day. Pick one and go, my friend.

[gnarly_1]

Hey Dude  ...well it s ucks to slip up  just be glad you dident find a bottle full....as I have said b/4 this is 1/3 phyical and 2/3 mental  it is not to take away how hard this is to to physically  but only to try to prepare you for the ''mental mindscrew'' witch is worst for most addicts....most people are afraid of N/A  your disease will tell you you dont need it it is only for addicts living in the allie slamming dope.....there are far more people just like you and I there lawyers nurces salesman like myself.... architects and tradesmen  addiction no know boundrys it takes everybody down that plays with fire  just know most people get there and breath a sigh of relief   it is truly a sanctuary for addicts  you can share somewhere where the people finely understand and about anything  life on lifes terms if your willing to do any thing to make it this is a critical step  ive been clean a wile now and still hit 4 meeting a week  I also speak at the local rehab 2 times a month  it may seam like a lot  but I have developed some great friends in N/A it is just like getting together with the boys  less the drinking and drugging....go to a meeting stick around and introduce yourself to some people  tell them where your at  you will be suprized at the comaradery we all share  this is the single best thing you can do for your recovery  and with time you will loose the very desire to use....something I thought was impossible  if it works for a old dope fiend like me it will work for anyone...''you dont loose the war as long as your willing to fight''
..........................................Gnarly.........................................

[Madmax88]

It happens, and unless you get into NA this week and not next it's possible to happen again. Beating addiction in my book is being able to see that pill and flush it!! I found one in my truck and tossed that boy in the grass without hesitation and you should be doing the same. It's being able to control yourself and urges, then eventually urges let up. I'm like 3 1/2 months clean which isn't much but I'm starting to see the big picture, it's a complete lifestyle change and being able to control yourself and what to do and to never give in to those lesser desires!! Though releaspe is common and a half won't set you back to far physically mentally it's a step back but you were only 3 days clean right? Imagine the person relasping at month 6, that guilt feeling would be unbarable that's why NA helps. Il give you this you slipped up and took one and went back on the wagon instantly a lot of people including myself would go binging until ready to get clean again. no one wanted to go to NA at first, but when nothing else worked and we all tried it our way time after time failing each time, you come here.