any cure???!!!

[b_rad29]

hi everyone. when i was 19 i broke my back in a car wreck and have been heavily addicted to booze and any kind of opiate i can get my hands on.  first they were perscribed.... oxy 80"s, the down to 40"s , then percs and swlowly down the painkiller ladder till they cut me off.  then there came the lying and stealing and everything elese that goes along with pill addiction.  All the while drinking as much liquor as i could get my hands on. I have a severely addictive personality and am miserable sober.  well it's been 10 years since my back injury and my love affair with pills.  the booze had been going on ever since i was a young kid though and both my parents and their families are alcoholics. im now almost 30 and have lost everything i ever had.  a 40.000 a year job with GM, a brand new truck, a house, but most of all the love of my life too. she was very supportive for a long time and even went through alota s*it to get me pills when i was sick.  but a person can only take so much before they know there on a sinking ship, and so she's gone.  well this is like my 20th time detoxing cold turkey, this time from a 15 norco 10-325 habit, and about a quart of black velvet a day.  like always im in the worst hell imagineable.  i know the physical bulls==t will pass,  but like i said i cannot handle sobriety, and i know ill be back on the bottle and the pills and whatever else comes my way.  ill be thirty in a few months and have a badly swollen liver, hepatitus and nothing left in my life but my addictions.  can anyone help???

[b_rad29]

you guys are awsome...thanks for the advice.....im really tryin here but its hard

[Htownnofrown]

Welcome,

Like Sara said, you should look into a medical detox. Opiates we can kick on our own fairly safely, but alcohol is a dangerous detox. Seizures and other severe reactions occur frequently when people attempt to cold-turkey alcohol. I know you probably have a lot going on and feel like you cant go into treatment or you'll miss something, but like you said, you've lost everything over 10 years in your addiction, whats another 30 days to start recovery?

Your liver will recover, there are new, progressive treatments for alcoholic hepatitus out now. You have to believe it is worth it to get sober. I saw people who were 50 and in your situation who have gotten sober, got fixed up health-wise, and now are living amazing lives. You can do it. Please get some help and don't try this the hard way again.

[IBKleen]

Hi,

I totally agree with Sarah. You need professional help and in-patient treatment is the way to go. You need help to learn how to STAY clean and get your self-esteem back and learn that sober is good, etc., etc.

You sound very down on yourself right now getting help will show you that you can be happy and you can keep a job and a relationship and you can have all those things in your life. You can have it sober.

I really hope you make the decision to go into treatment. Get the help you need. I wish you the best.

[dominosarah]

Yes you can handle sobriety but you are so beat down right now.  Have you ever checked into any type of recovery care?  You need this so bad.  You are worth it.  Come out fighting this time, dont set yourself up for failure by saying you know you cant stay clean.  We all have it in us to get and stay clean and sober.......sara

[dominosarah]

Please contact an inpatient treatment center asap.  You need to get this figured out before you dont see your 31st birthday.  You can get off the pills and booze and live a happy life.  There is always hope.......sara