Aa
Still worried
I am still not having any withdrawals but I am still scared to death about the pharmacy calling the doctor about the fake Rx... I feel like I am sitting on a time bomb just waiting to go to jail. I prayed until I fell asleep last night. but I honestly dont think those prayers will be answered. I did a lot of thinking and I realize I only pray when I need something now when I am thankful for something... Why would god help me now when I was stupid and became an addict and did this horrible thing?
Thank you so much for both of your replys. It really does mean alot. I spent time last night praying to god and telling him what I was thankful for in life, which is something I have not done in a long long time. I am feeling better after my NA meeting knowing that there are people around me who have suffered through all kinds of addiction and they got help and thats what I am doing as well. I was scared when I was there and I only said my name but that was a step. I cant wait until I am not afraid to speak to people again. I miss being out going and looking people in the eye.
And for people saying that the pharmacist won't take the time or care, oh yes they will. I have seen it first hand. Prescription fraud is a felony and since the pharmacist is the final gateway, they can be held accountable. My local pharmacy had a pharmacist fired because he refilled scripts too soon and did not report suspect prescriptions. She may be given a reprieve but she won't be that lucky forever. I understand that many of us suffer from denial but really, telling her not to worry and the pharmacist doesn't have time to deal with it but in reality pharmacists are held accountable and legally obligated to report anything suspicious.
it's me again, the one who writes too many words. I wish to point out how many people are pulling for you. looks like we got yer back girl. now you go on and get your tool box ready so you can get your 'front'.
you are cared about. Collective good vibes going your way, powerful stuff!!!!
yay
yippee skippee
I am happy for you, change is a comin
hajji
you are cared about. Collective good vibes going your way, powerful stuff!!!!
yay
yippee skippee
I am happy for you, change is a comin
hajji
No offense, but I hope you are scared. Not to be mean, but to give you a wake up call. I still wonder if you would have posted and asked for help if you weren't in risk of getting caught. I hope you are ready. If nothing happens as a result of your calling in that script then what? I want you to get better for yourself and your family. I still have my doubts as to whether you would be asking for help had the prescription been approved. I hope this is your wake up call and not just a ploy to stay out of trouble. God does answer prayers. He also helps he who helps himself. I hope that even if they don't catch you that you take this opportunity seriously and get the help you need.
We addicts all have fudged scripts, some more often than u and never were caught. The fact that this ex-boss isnt so nice can work in your favor. 1) he could care less about you as a person. I ppromise u if he has to spend extra time and effort to HELP u he won't. He cares more about self preservation of his practice. He won't do anything that brings attn to him. thats the benefit of a self centered ego money man
2) The dea would contact him in writing at the same time as u. that isnt gonna happen because the pharmacy is naughty. the pharmacy wont tell on someone if they were responsible for not double checking. it would be like them telling on themsleves. if anyone is worried at ALL it is the pharmcist that did nothing. same scenario as the doc, they just want it to go away. So beyond you and your concerns are 2 other entities with much more to lose. like a job and a practice plus face fines and jail time. the end user is not the most severly punished it is the 2 that held the power but neglected to do their jobs. I betcha they dont know or they are praying harder than you! What we know about the universe is like attracts like. Think about the things you drew to you, be them good or bad they were still generated by your thoughts. over time the thoughts manifest. so make a rule, no more thinking about this, I mean ever. at least until the coast is clear and in my gut, which by the way I am an intuitive (which is why I had to drug myself to avoid feeling and knowing things I didnt want to or couldnt explain) I am certain that is a dead subject. Remember the rule, when u start feeling anxious and suspect your going to obsess or think about what worries you stop it! STOP IT IMMEDIATELY! How I do this is I have a toolbox of thoughts in my mind. These thoughts are all good and positive. memories of laying on the beach, making love, or subjects studided. use the tool box from now on in every aspect of your life to keep negativity away. I promise if u do this it will work. Bama and gasten are right. now I'm the 3rd person telling you no problems babe. toolbox, write a list pick the easiest to go to and have 5 at the ready. I do it when i lay down to sleep at night and wake up every day. otherwise i'd be a mess. the world is crazy and i'm a satellite dish. i cried for 2 weeks in dec 1999 turn of the ne millenium, didnt know why. went to doc and demanded prozac. during that 2 week period I could do nothing but cry and did not sleep a minute, and by the way I was on a vaca from work. took the prozac, only one, it made me feel like my soul wasn't in my body. flushed the rest down toilet. then 2 days later turned on the t.v. and what I saw was this; 3 iraqi girls crying. why? Saddam husseins soldiers took over their mudhut skack of a house and raped their mother repeatedly only after killing and dismembering their father. So the mother gets raped, daughters forced to watch. they kill the mother. then raped the 3 girls. then they left. the 3 girls 8, 10, 13yrs old sat outside that shack with their parents bodies inside and cried. they sobbed for 2 weeks. turns out I was sobbing for the same two weeks. I began sleeping and stopped sobbing after that. Began dreaming I was an american soldier be hidden in trunks of cars carried over enemy lines, toting machine gun full on warlike lieflike lucid dreams and I awkened with the taste of curry in my mouth and the texture of sand. Girl I hate curry and sure dont eat sand. My credentials speak for themselves. that is why I shared the horror story to convince you that dead subject is gone like yesterday. feel free to contact me. hajji out
2) The dea would contact him in writing at the same time as u. that isnt gonna happen because the pharmacy is naughty. the pharmacy wont tell on someone if they were responsible for not double checking. it would be like them telling on themsleves. if anyone is worried at ALL it is the pharmcist that did nothing. same scenario as the doc, they just want it to go away. So beyond you and your concerns are 2 other entities with much more to lose. like a job and a practice plus face fines and jail time. the end user is not the most severly punished it is the 2 that held the power but neglected to do their jobs. I betcha they dont know or they are praying harder than you! What we know about the universe is like attracts like. Think about the things you drew to you, be them good or bad they were still generated by your thoughts. over time the thoughts manifest. so make a rule, no more thinking about this, I mean ever. at least until the coast is clear and in my gut, which by the way I am an intuitive (which is why I had to drug myself to avoid feeling and knowing things I didnt want to or couldnt explain) I am certain that is a dead subject. Remember the rule, when u start feeling anxious and suspect your going to obsess or think about what worries you stop it! STOP IT IMMEDIATELY! How I do this is I have a toolbox of thoughts in my mind. These thoughts are all good and positive. memories of laying on the beach, making love, or subjects studided. use the tool box from now on in every aspect of your life to keep negativity away. I promise if u do this it will work. Bama and gasten are right. now I'm the 3rd person telling you no problems babe. toolbox, write a list pick the easiest to go to and have 5 at the ready. I do it when i lay down to sleep at night and wake up every day. otherwise i'd be a mess. the world is crazy and i'm a satellite dish. i cried for 2 weeks in dec 1999 turn of the ne millenium, didnt know why. went to doc and demanded prozac. during that 2 week period I could do nothing but cry and did not sleep a minute, and by the way I was on a vaca from work. took the prozac, only one, it made me feel like my soul wasn't in my body. flushed the rest down toilet. then 2 days later turned on the t.v. and what I saw was this; 3 iraqi girls crying. why? Saddam husseins soldiers took over their mudhut skack of a house and raped their mother repeatedly only after killing and dismembering their father. So the mother gets raped, daughters forced to watch. they kill the mother. then raped the 3 girls. then they left. the 3 girls 8, 10, 13yrs old sat outside that shack with their parents bodies inside and cried. they sobbed for 2 weeks. turns out I was sobbing for the same two weeks. I began sleeping and stopped sobbing after that. Began dreaming I was an american soldier be hidden in trunks of cars carried over enemy lines, toting machine gun full on warlike lieflike lucid dreams and I awkened with the taste of curry in my mouth and the texture of sand. Girl I hate curry and sure dont eat sand. My credentials speak for themselves. that is why I shared the horror story to convince you that dead subject is gone like yesterday. feel free to contact me. hajji out
Thank you so much. I just wish I could get this fear out of my head of going to jail. I know I need to focus on getting better but I cant help but worry. Hopefully as the days go by I will stop worrying as much and be able to focus more on getting better.
I will be sending jingles your way when you go! Hang in there, keep positive...your mind is an enermously powerful thing....s
Why don't you say a prayer that IF it comes to that, God would soften this man's heart enough to allow you to speak with him before turning you in. I believe in prayer. I have had mine answered in the form of a miracle before. I will pray for you, too. Now, prepare in your mind a humble, honest speech of what you would tell him, why you did it, how you stumbled into addiction, how miserable and sorry you are for it, and exactly what your plans are to fix it. Also, be prepared to turn in your license as a medical assistant to prove to him how serious you are about it. I know if I were the doctor, I would give you a fair chance to hear your side before making a rash decision to turn you in.
Yes I did used to work for him. he really isnt a very nice man but I hope he will just talk to me about it if they call him.
Didn't you used to work for this doctor? Maybe he will cut you some slack and talk to you first before calling the police, if he is a decent guy. (This is assuming the worst case scenario that the pharmacist left the message and the doctor calls in on a Sunday and hears it). Seems our minds our always working in "worst case scenario" mode, aren't they!!
It's Sunday. Isn't the doctor's office closed? They wouldn't call today, I wouldn't think.
I feek like I am losing my mind I keep looking out the window for the police.
I am done. it is more then just the thought of going to jail. this all put in perspective that I was hurting my ^ year old as well and he doesnt deserve this. he is so smart and so beautiful and he is all I have he deserves the mommy I was less then a year ago. The good mommy the sober mommy.
i have followed your thread from beginning...i think your ok. just follow the advise you've been given. and never ever go back to that pharmacy for nothing...there's another one if ya need anything later. take this experience to heart. learn from it. remember it every time you think about wanting a pill..and remember the pharmacy flagged you. it happened to me. one time i changed a script from 5 to 7.5 and was caught. the pharmacist gave me an ear full and told me i could have went to jail. but they let it slide. even gave me my fives...i never ever changed a script after that...so know your not alone...just breathe and you'll be ok. and like vikki said..the pharmacist are too busy to check into this..lets keep being positive...
may i ask a hard question? are you done with pills for good? because now you see how dangerous they really are!! how do you feel about walking away for good? i hope you do. if you continue or go back to them more negative things will happen...i did not learn my lesson from my pharmacy experience...it took loosing my car. yes i recovered it back. but now i know if i go back it will just keep getting worst...i am praying for you.
and God hears prayers...i prayed over getting my car back...i know its petty. but i prayed anyways. thy will be done.
count your blessings...and please stay with us...we've been thru or saw so much. now we are focused (or me) on helping others escape or get over the pills.....your friend bama
may i ask a hard question? are you done with pills for good? because now you see how dangerous they really are!! how do you feel about walking away for good? i hope you do. if you continue or go back to them more negative things will happen...i did not learn my lesson from my pharmacy experience...it took loosing my car. yes i recovered it back. but now i know if i go back it will just keep getting worst...i am praying for you.
and God hears prayers...i prayed over getting my car back...i know its petty. but i prayed anyways. thy will be done.
count your blessings...and please stay with us...we've been thru or saw so much. now we are focused (or me) on helping others escape or get over the pills.....your friend bama
If you continue your constant stressing, it can cause severe anxiety symptoms which can be indistinguishable from withdrawal. You might think you're in withdrawal, but in actuality it is panic/anxiety. You have had a LOT of good advice from people here so far. You know what you have to do. You are going to be honest and admit it if confronted, but even if you are off the hook on this one legally, you are still going to get help with your addiction and stick with this forum as well for assistance. That is a definite plan. Noone can argue that that is the best course of action. So try to calm down, know that we all make mistakes, some worse than others, but that you have really learned from this mistake and yes, down the road something positive is going to come of it for you. Keep your chin up and be prepared to do whatever it takes to make things better!
My last pill was on thursday that isnt much clean time. I am going to go to NA tomorrow this will be my first time ever going there and I am not sure what I do.
I am just scared that the pharmacy will call the doctor and they will call the cops. I cant believe I did this. I told my fiance last night what I did and he is not upset and will stand by my side and take care of my son if I do go to jail but it will be hard seeing how he is about 2 hours away from us. I really hope nothing comes of this... I tried to call it in yesterday around 10:30 does anybody know about how long it would take me to hear from the police if the pharmacy did call them?
Exactly what she said....^^^^^ never go there again. Get the help you need and put your effort into recovery, nothing you can do about the call in now.
You will be ok. If contacted , do not lie.,Immeditly fess up and tell the law of your intentions and clean time. Begin meetings and show that your wanting to be in recovery. you have to want this.
Okay. I read your other post. Here's what I think:
You got away with the first one so let's forget that for now. The second one never got filled because there was no DEA number and no fax sent by the doctor.
If they haven'tcalled by now,it seems unlikely they will. They can't prove it was YOU who phoned it in. They can "suspect" but that's not real evidence. In addition, pharmacists are way too busy to track down each curious little problem.
I think, at the most, they're waiting to see if you call about your prescription OR the "new girl" calls with the DEA number to order it again. If you showed up to pick up a suspicious rx, they'd have their evidence. Right now, they've got nothing!
But, stay away from that pharmacy and just don't ever go there again!
You got away with the first one so let's forget that for now. The second one never got filled because there was no DEA number and no fax sent by the doctor.
If they haven'tcalled by now,it seems unlikely they will. They can't prove it was YOU who phoned it in. They can "suspect" but that's not real evidence. In addition, pharmacists are way too busy to track down each curious little problem.
I think, at the most, they're waiting to see if you call about your prescription OR the "new girl" calls with the DEA number to order it again. If you showed up to pick up a suspicious rx, they'd have their evidence. Right now, they've got nothing!
But, stay away from that pharmacy and just don't ever go there again!
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