so suboxone now

[flyforfish]

My wife has decided that I need to be on suboxone now. I'm concerned that I'll never be able to get relief for my back pain would methadone be a better option I don't want to have to the clinic every morning though, should I just ask my pain management dr. Tell him that I have a problem with my pain medication and I would like to be switched to methadone?

[msdelight]

Good morning fly, happy day 9 I hope. Just wondering how things are going and if the wife backed down about the sub program. I hope so. At this point it would be a great idea to hit a meeting or get some private therapy (no sub, no wife) .Also, wanted you to know that your pain will get better on its own soon. It is normal for it to get worse the first week or so. Partly due to your natural endorphins trying to reset, and partly our addiction trying to take hold again.  Things will even out soon. A chiropractor may help, and motrin or advil will get you through the worst of it. Keep going friend and don't look back. I hope mrs fly is as proud of you as I am right now!

[flyforfish]

No back surgeries just injections I've been avoiding surgery like the plague I have had an appendectomy and my gallbladder removed

[Merri123]

Have you ever tried the Lidacaine patches?

[Merri123]

Fly. You have had 2 back surgeries now? Or just one?  Is there anything you can do or is this it and you have to deal with the pain?  

Your job is going to make that difficult. And I'm not suggesting you get a different job. That is what you do.

[nursegirl6572]

Wow, congrats on the 8 days!  So, is that 8 days totally clean?  Did you decide to go the sub route, or no?

If you haven't started them, I also would be in the camp of the people who would advise against it, and I'm a pretty big supporter of a sub program done right, in certain circumstances.  

There IS no magic pill, unfortunately...and if people approached a Sub program as a comprehensive program to start down a road to recovery in all ways, NOT just to avoid withdrawals from their DOC, more people would be successful on it.  As it stands though, the vast majority of people turn to subs because they fear the w/ds.  That should be only a VERY small factor in the decision to go the Sub route...and at 8 days clean, IMO, it would be going backward.

I agree that an inpatient, or intensive OP program would help you immensely.  Like MSD said, you have to figure out what is driving your addiction, that is unique to YOU, as everyone is different.  The answer to that question is the best place to start as far as a recovery program...those issues need addressed if you want to have a fighting chance of staying clean.  

I understand that the dynamic right now with your wife is that she's giving you a last chance basically, an ultimatum, which you cannot really fault her for....it's NOT easy being the loved one of an addict, and NOT a lot of people truly get it.  Despite that, you've got to make decisions based on what YOU want, and based on what YOU think is best for you moving forward.  If that involves a path not recommended by your wife, then hopefully bringing her along with you, and getting her in front of an addiction specialist would help.  Everyone involved with addiction needs educated.

Hang in there...be proud for this first milestone, and keep us updated!

[flyforfish]

Thanks everybody I'm 8 days from my little slip up feel alot better in most ways but I'm definitely definitely reminded why I started using I'm at work today and my back is very unhappy about it.

[Readytoquitthis]

Fly, I was on Meth for 10 years. It was a great pain killer, But you must be careful when you start to come down. It may be a long progress. but you will feel alot better. After that all happened to me, and stood clean for another 10 years. I got into an accident which I had to get surgery and then the doctor prescribe percucet. Which brought me back here for abusing them. After that I got on suboxones. That is also good, but the withdraws are a real pain. Everybody is different. for me the Meth was the best option. Take your wife and consult with the doctors. either way it's going to be ruff if you dont do it right. The reason I'm suffering now is because I've been on a Suboxone clinic for over 8 months, and not once did they tell me that I had to pay. Yes, I did have insurance and still do. Well, all of a sudden I'm told that I need to pay over $2,000.00. all before my next visit. I told them to kiss my ***. Why couldn't they tell me something any sooner. Well, thats why I'm here trying to get the best advice I can. If you do decide to go with the Meth, 35mg. should be able to help you. after a month or two from feeling comtable start to come down atleast 1 mg a month. Good luck, and I hope everything works out for you.

[msdelight]

Fly, I think a better solution for you would be to go to an inpatient detox for at least 30 days, somewhere as far away as you can get from your current situation, and re-evaluate your life and what you want for the future. If you're living in a toxic situation, its will be very hard to get clean. Take a step back from it all. People on programs abuse their subs and methadone too. It doesn't come with a guarantee.  You need to fix the things that are making you want to use.

[Ndetox]

One thing I know for sure is that we will ALWAYS find a reason to get high! It's raining..let's get high..I had a bad day.. Let's get high..the sun is shining.. Well you get the picture. Lol. Anywho, I agree that you need to do what works for you in terms of treatment but I do hope that you see that more than not regret getting on subs and especially methadone. I played around with subs when I couldn't score Roxies. I will tell you that they are VERY strong! Above I saw that you should not take anymore that .25mg considering your habit. Good advice!!! Many doctors will want to start you at 8mg. Insane! By the way.. If you are on either of these drugs no more Xanax. At least your not suppose to. Very dangerous! Wishing you the best! -Jess

[flyforfish]

Yeah while I was kicked out I felt entitled to run wild I know that's dumb though but I sure justified it.

[Merri123]

Actually he started he fell off on Friday. So he is 2 days in again.

[dominosarah]

I agree with MsD on this one.  This is about YOU.  You are having a hard enough time with the hydros and sub or meth is even worse.  Get to the bottom of why you are using.  Aftercare for you and your wife will break those chains.

[msdelight]

Your already clean a week now, right? Why on earth would you start taking sub or methadone now? Its just another drug you'll get hooked on and have to detox off of, keeping you an addict. Both drugs are WAY stronger than hydros. This makes no sense to me. Another week and you'll be feeling a lot better. Be your own advocate and make your own decision. Mrs Fly is wrong about this. Go to therapy instead.

[flyforfish]

Thanks everybody after I sleepless night at work I think I'm going to go take a nap thanks for all the suggestions and advice

[jugglin]

You have been given a lot of great advice and information on this thread.  I think a rehab program would be amazing for you.  It will give you face to face support from professionals and other addicts and I think this is crucial in your recovery.  I wish you could take time for an inpatient program, but outpatient is certainly a great step forward.  
Just wanted to stop by and show support.
Don't stop fighting for you.

[Merri123]

The outpatient rehab will help you with this. They offer all options. Not sure about methadone but Suboxone should be offered there. You have to decide what is right for you not what is right for anyone else. We are all different and need different things. You have issues for sure. You have had surgery and are still in pain.

Between and rehab and your Doctor, you should be able to decide what your next step is. And step after. Even if only temporary, if you need one of the two to get clean, then you can work your way off of that with s taper and guidance. I think the outpatient is going to do wonders for you. Group and individual counseling is key here.

You can do this. Ian happy everything is out in the open now and you have support from her. It is hard on both sides. Patience is needed. And complete openness and honesty too.

[Merri123]

The outpatient rehab will help you with this. They offer all options. Not sure about methadone but Suboxone should be offered there. You have to decide what is right for you not what is right for anyone else. We are all different and need different things. You have issues for sure. You have had surgery and are still in pain.

Between and rehab and your Doctor, you should be able to decide what your next step is. And step after. Even if only temporary, if you need one of the two to get clean, then you can work your way off of that with s taper and guidance. I think the outpatient is going to do wonders for you. Group and individual counseling is key here.

You can do this. Ian happy everything is out in the open now and you have support from her. It is hard on both sides. Patience is needed. And complete openness and honesty too.

[weaver71]

We have a saying, "Don't give up, just before a miracle." Had you made it to 5 days, I think you would have started to feel better. I CT 200mgs of hydro, many years ago. It is rough, not anywhere near as bad as methadone, but it goes by pretty fast. Hang in there, i am one of those who has less pain off all meds.

And by the way, subs or buprenorphine, was originally developed as a pain killer with less euphoria, in Europe. Human trials started on that drug in 1971, yet we still have no long term test for addiction recovery, most of the original research is for it's use as an analgesic. Anyway, I have a friend who uses sub for pain and addiction recovery. He will take it all his life, but he is very functional and able to work. No, sub doesn't work for him like Oxy's did, but that is good, he has to slow down some, if he wants to function into old age.

Just trying to give you more info, to help you make an educated decision. I want to say this again, I have less pain now, on nothing, than I did on 250mgs of methadone. Opiates only work short term, then tolerance and opiate induced hyper algesia sets in. It becomes an endless cycle for many of us. Is your addict mind persuading you that you need to be on SOMETHING, you don't need to answer, just want you to really think about that. I have three cracked vertebrae right now, they will probably never heal, but even withe my pain, life is a million times better than taking any kind of drug.

[flyforfish]

I absolutely want to stay married, my wife is an unholy b*tch sometimes, but we do love each other though. The only reason I could consider methadone would be for my back injury. I would rather do subs if anything at all. I've been doing 175mg of hydro daily divided into a couple doses. I did have 4 days clean but I messed up Friday, so 2 days down again. I just have such a hard time staying clean.

[NeverAgain127]

You're getting all kinds of advice here...but I agree with whomever said "What do YOU want to do? "  

This can't be your wife's recovery...it has to be yours.   Are you still taking the pills?  Have you been taking more to cope with all this new stress?

Do you WANT to stay married?   And, more importantly (or just as importantly) do you want to be sober?  It isn't as simple as just getting off the pills...you gotta be willing to live life on life's terms...that may mean some daily pain tolerance.

But...as others have said, you have no idea what you true pain level is.   When you're on opiates for a while, the pain increases ten-fold.  And for the first month OFF them, in addition to the lovely w/d's, you will feel a lot of pain, but it really does die down eventually.

Lots of big questions for you...its kind of a fork in the road.  The ball, however is in YOUR court.

Let us know how you're doing...

Hugs,
-Robin

[weaver71]

You are prescribed 7.5 Mgs a day of hydro, but I don't remember how much you actually take. I just want to point out that dose would make .25mgs of sub plenty. If you took 30-40mgs hydro a day, 1mg sub is considered an equivalent. Being that it took me a year to feel like I healed from methadone, I would never suggest using it for hydro, which is about a month to feel as good as I did in a year. Personally, I think methadone would get you high, being you are addicted to hydro. It doesn't surprise me, but it saddens me that your wife works in the recovery field and seems to know little about these different drugs. Maybe she doesn't care, I don't know, but you will have a higher tolerance and withdrawal with sub and even worse on methadone, unless used at very low doses for a very short time. I'd divorce before going back on methadone, leave the kids and all, that is how bad that drug was for me. Keep us posted.

[ScarrieAnne]

Please think long and hard before you get on Suboxone or heaven forbid, Methadone. That's like trying to help your pk addiction with heroin, in my opinion. I don't want to steer you in any one direction, only you can decide, but if you go read all of my posts about suboxone withdrawal, you will hear what the docs don't tell you, you live where I do and they are going to tell you its safe! no withdrawal! its a miracle! You need this and you need to pay me a crapload of cash! You have it within you to quit without these drugs. Hindsight is 20/20, but I could've detoxed myself so much easier, had I never got on suboxone. Its way shorter and not that bad. You have to be ready, otherwise you are just trading one addiction for another and will be spending a lot of money every month. I wish you well, just do your research before you make a rash decision. Its hard to face withdrawal, but its a lot easier to face a week of it, rather than months. Take Care and keep us posted, Carrie.

[kellygirll]

oh and also i could never string together more than a month tops off the pills i would always relapse till i added after care meetings 12 step program sponsor i now have 105 days clean so all the after care everyone preaches really does help if what you want is to stay clean

[kellygirll]

heres my opion suboxone is the lesser of the two evils if used correctly it works wonders (i used it) are you having a hard time staying clean? relapse after relapse? subs help with that but you MUST and i repeat MUST have some sort of aftercare my first round with subs i thought it was a miracle i was not doing pills for a whole year and i was not doing aftercare either so of course when i stopped the subs i relapsed shortly after imo methadone shouldn't be used to get off pills it really shouldn't be used at all the withdrawl is horrid i hear and they are very resistant to let people go i.e. taper you off when you want so think long and hard but after care is KEY my friend and dont do something just cuz your wife says so your your own person and this is YOUR addiction do your research