Aa
Help please. Day 6 of opiate withdrawal.
Hello all. I would just like to say I'm on day 6 of opiate withdrawal. A little back ground I'm 26 female who needs to use daily. Ive been addicted to any kind of opiate for the last 4 years. I Bang (IV) anything from oxy, methadone, morphine, and heroine anything that I can get my hands on for the day. I've tried to quit numerous times over the last year but fail every time. I'm sick of pawning my precious items being broke everyday waking up feeling like **** and only caring about my next fix. I never thought I would grow up and be a drug addict. I don't really have a support system which is why I am here. My friends and family have no idea so rehab is not an option also I have a really good job that would let me go if they knew I had a drug problem. So quitting on my own is the only way. Every time
I try to quit I make it to day 6 and cave :( ... I guess I'm just really looking for someone to talk to and give hope. I'm sorry if I am rambling and my post is hard to follow my head is all over the place and I have gotten very little sleep these last 6 days. I appreciate anyone's comments. Thank you. AA
I try to quit I make it to day 6 and cave :( ... I guess I'm just really looking for someone to talk to and give hope. I'm sorry if I am rambling and my post is hard to follow my head is all over the place and I have gotten very little sleep these last 6 days. I appreciate anyone's comments. Thank you. AA
Keep trying and you will get there. Ive just finished day one and only beginning to feel wd symptoms but I'm determined I'm going to stick to it this time as my life is ruined the way i'm going. Don't feel great tonight but i've nothing in the house and that in itself makes me feel good mentally as I really want to do it this time. Come on you can do it too.
Hi & WElcome,
First step...breathe. So you lost precious things in your life and it is getting worse. It seems you have very little left..like your job for one but that will go too if you continue to use. My drug of choice is Heroin and I used it IV for more years then I can count. It came to the point for me that I got sick and tired of being sick and tired and I finally gave up..surrendered, got humble and asked for help. I did jail time and 3 treatments centers. It was time to do something or die. That is where you are at right now lady and if you don't ask for help you may be a statistic. Coming here was a big step now you have to take the next one. Are you REALLY ready for this? Are you ready to get clean?
First step...breathe. So you lost precious things in your life and it is getting worse. It seems you have very little left..like your job for one but that will go too if you continue to use. My drug of choice is Heroin and I used it IV for more years then I can count. It came to the point for me that I got sick and tired of being sick and tired and I finally gave up..surrendered, got humble and asked for help. I did jail time and 3 treatments centers. It was time to do something or die. That is where you are at right now lady and if you don't ask for help you may be a statistic. Coming here was a big step now you have to take the next one. Are you REALLY ready for this? Are you ready to get clean?
Hi, Ashleigh. You know what's weird? You signed your post "AA"...a strong sign I think!
You always cave around now you've said. You've tried and tried but ended up going back. Same w/ so so many (if not all) of us. That means you have to do something different. I didn't want to believe I needed aftercare, but I do. So far, it's the only thing keeping me SANE and clean (I have been clean and insane!) I go to meetings every day. Gonna pick up my 60 day chip. Since my active addiction, this is the longest consistently clean I have been. So aftercare is a must, sweetie.
A great first step by posting here, and spilling your "secret." Everyone thinks their situation is so unique and horrible...it's the same as everyone elses! Take comfort in that. You are in very very good company.
Keep posting. And just get thru today. That's all you need to do right now.
You always cave around now you've said. You've tried and tried but ended up going back. Same w/ so so many (if not all) of us. That means you have to do something different. I didn't want to believe I needed aftercare, but I do. So far, it's the only thing keeping me SANE and clean (I have been clean and insane!) I go to meetings every day. Gonna pick up my 60 day chip. Since my active addiction, this is the longest consistently clean I have been. So aftercare is a must, sweetie.
A great first step by posting here, and spilling your "secret." Everyone thinks their situation is so unique and horrible...it's the same as everyone elses! Take comfort in that. You are in very very good company.
Keep posting. And just get thru today. That's all you need to do right now.
Lazyann, thank you so much for replying. I honestly didn't think anyone would reply. I can't even begin to tell you how good it is to finally be able to talk to someone, anyone and not keep it all to myself. I feel the same way as you it's now or never I need to get my life together before it's completely ruined. I have horrible withdrawals shaky... hot and cold flashes like crazy... goosebumps.. very moody.. achy.. headache... brain fog... runny/stuffy nose at the same time.. sweating .. everything hurts.. RLS... my mind is racing ...I can't sit I'm so uncomfortable so I've been pacing my house... I'm so exhausted everything is exhausting... And horrible insomnia I'm lucky If I get a hour or 2 a night and that's a good night .. I'm so I'm hoping we both make it through to the other side.
IBK ... I'm trying to breathe lol it's very overwhelming. Yes I'm ready to quit. If I wasn't ready I wouldn't of bothered wasting time making a post. I'm ready to have my life back and be a happy person again
Jifmoc it might be a strong sign but I'm not ready for that yet. I'm starting slow and this post was a huge milestone for me. Eventually I will worry about aftercare but for the moment I'm working on making it through these next 7hrs and 55mins to make it to day 7. Even though I told my dealer I was done he just called and I ignored it .. I think I'm finally gonna do it this time :)
Oh no please dont quit. Keep going. Go out tomorrow as i did today and buy very strong multivitamins, immodium, and antihistimins with a drowzy effect. Ive been told all these will help and eat bananas for their potassium effect. these will help with restless legs. Keep thinking what is at the end of the tunnel. If you quit so might I because I'm behind you by about 5 days and I dont want to quit - not this time. I've tried this before and it never worked but i'm hopeing with the help of this forum I'll stick it this time. Keep me posted and keep going.
Hi Ashleigh,
It sounds like you are ready...I agree that for right now you just need to take a day at a time. Come here as often as you feel you need to chat....no matter the time. This forum helped me and has kept me sane throughout my CT...being able to talk to others, read people's stories, share mine and, eventually, start to try to help others...kept me from taking a pill.
The biggest problem you face right now is getting rid of all the people who will tempt you to use. The dealers will surely work on you the most...but you need to keep in mind..they do NOT care about you..they only care about your money. Here, in this forum, we do not care about your money we care about you and your well-being.
Get through today...tomorrow will be another day to work through...and yes, you will need to think about aftercare...you will need all the support you can get especially while trying to get rid of those who don't have your best interests in mind.
For most people Day 3 seems to be the hump day....Day 6 is your hump day....read a book, watch lots of movies, take good hot baths, do anything and everything you can to keep your mind occupied. Your brain is going to be your worst enemy right now...going to do everything it can to convince you that you HAVE to have that drug...but you don't. I used for over 10 years...and I can honestly say I was scared to death to quit...but I just had to keep telling myself...I don't need the drug...I am NOT in that much pain and my brain is f'ed up right now so I'm not going to listen to that inner voice until I can trust it again!
Take care of yourself...and keep talking...let us know how you are doing okay?
It sounds like you are ready...I agree that for right now you just need to take a day at a time. Come here as often as you feel you need to chat....no matter the time. This forum helped me and has kept me sane throughout my CT...being able to talk to others, read people's stories, share mine and, eventually, start to try to help others...kept me from taking a pill.
The biggest problem you face right now is getting rid of all the people who will tempt you to use. The dealers will surely work on you the most...but you need to keep in mind..they do NOT care about you..they only care about your money. Here, in this forum, we do not care about your money we care about you and your well-being.
Get through today...tomorrow will be another day to work through...and yes, you will need to think about aftercare...you will need all the support you can get especially while trying to get rid of those who don't have your best interests in mind.
For most people Day 3 seems to be the hump day....Day 6 is your hump day....read a book, watch lots of movies, take good hot baths, do anything and everything you can to keep your mind occupied. Your brain is going to be your worst enemy right now...going to do everything it can to convince you that you HAVE to have that drug...but you don't. I used for over 10 years...and I can honestly say I was scared to death to quit...but I just had to keep telling myself...I don't need the drug...I am NOT in that much pain and my brain is f'ed up right now so I'm not going to listen to that inner voice until I can trust it again!
Take care of yourself...and keep talking...let us know how you are doing okay?
I just wanted to remind you...be sure to hydrate a lot, try to eat a little something..banana's would be perfect. Take the hot baths (with epsom salts if you have them) to help with the RLS, good Vitamin B complex, melatonin or benadryl to help with sleep. If you have a doctor you can call...ask for Clonidine...it helps with w/d symptoms and cravings. There is a recipe on here also called Thomas' Recipe. I'm not sure where it is at.....can someone help out Ashleigh with that?
The recipe will give you other suggestions. I think if you can tone down the withdrawal symptoms you will do a whole lot better. I know I did.
The recipe will give you other suggestions. I think if you can tone down the withdrawal symptoms you will do a whole lot better. I know I did.
Hi Ashleigh,
U r so young and have so much life in front of you. And that life will b much more fulfilling when it's not owned by drugs. Lots of support n encouragement coming your way from lots of great people who have been thru what u r going thru right now. They did it, I did it, and so can u. It's a challenge, to say the least, but u r stronger than u know.
Yes, aftercare is critical. But IMO...they call it aftercare cause it's there for AFTER u get thru detox n start feeling human again. Stay the course n get thru. Then u can find what aftercare works best for you. U can do this Ashleigh. You ARE doing this! Great job. Keep posting.
U r so young and have so much life in front of you. And that life will b much more fulfilling when it's not owned by drugs. Lots of support n encouragement coming your way from lots of great people who have been thru what u r going thru right now. They did it, I did it, and so can u. It's a challenge, to say the least, but u r stronger than u know.
Yes, aftercare is critical. But IMO...they call it aftercare cause it's there for AFTER u get thru detox n start feeling human again. Stay the course n get thru. Then u can find what aftercare works best for you. U can do this Ashleigh. You ARE doing this! Great job. Keep posting.
Hi there & Welcome, AA :)
Thanks so much for your honesty & on reaching out!
I too was an IV heroin addict for many, many years. I know where you're @ right now. It sent shivers down my spine just reading your post. I feel your desperation, 'lostness' & lack of clarity on your situation. Your higher nature -- the part of you crying -- no make that screaming -- out for self-control & self-preservation is what brought you here & I congratulate you on that!
There IS a way out of your chronic misery. You're young, you've only been using for 4 yrs. but the way you describe your use tells me that it's especially important for you to do everything in your power to put the brakes on this, NOW. We're never guaranteed another go round. I lost so many, many friends @ your age (& almost died a couple of times myself) that it started to make me feel unreal & wonder why I was still alive.
Of special concern to me was your mention of shooting 'done & Oxys. Any drug that is meant to be used orally is made to go into the churning acid environment of your stomach which will filter out most of the things that would otherwise harm us. Not so when you IV these same medications. Shooting these drugs can lead to all kinds of serious problems, permanent nerve & vascular damage, gangrene (I've seen it), pneumonia, blockages, cellulitis, liver damage, pneumonia, endocarditis & death to name just a few.
You say that your family & friends have no idea. Well, I'm not so sure & I'm offering the following in the most caring & honest way I can:
In the beginning I used to believe that too but soon realized that people were a lot hipper than I was giving them credit for & that moreover, my As$ was showing. (Meaning, I couldn't see myself clearly & it was patently obvious to many what was going on). People see when your behavior changes, when your moods go up & down, when you lose interest in people, things & activities that you used to care about, when you're broke all the time, when you continuously wear long sleeves, when you've lost weight, when you have to leave places or can't show @ places 'cause you've got to get a fix, when you nod out, when your eyes are pinned or you scratch, when your to ill to function, when you spend too long in the bathroom & come out changed, when you lie or evade....the list goes on. My point is, is that this might not be as big a secret as you currently believe to those close to you. Four years is quite a while. :)
The reason that I'm mentioning this is because as long as you're unwilling to do certain things (& I know it's really scary & that the fear, shame & guilt are huge!) to face this thing head on & put together a smart plan for detox & beyond, It won't work. Why? Because the problem isn't physical. As addicts, out real challenge lies after we kick -- in sitting in our skins -- facing restlessness, grief, boredom & anger or whatever -- without reaching for something to change our chemistries. Think about it, if this weren't the case, then no one would relapse. You will not be able to do this on your own, my friend. Coming here is a GREAT first step but it's key that you block all your sources & come out to a non-judgmental family member, friend, Dr. whatever. It's a huge relief & it levels the playing field for us a bit as when we keep our 'secret', we only have to answer to ourselves & we invariably fall. Our habit controls us. We have to change our very way of thinking, seeing & acting. Doing this the way you've been doing it has never worked before, right? So, why should it work this time? There's a famous quote:
'Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.'
Albert Einstein
That's why you always cave on day 6. (Mine was Day 3;). So, the question is what is it that you're willing to change..to do differently this time?
I know that you want encouragement & I want very badly to give it to you but I can't without telling you what it will Truly take for this to work for you, my friend. :)
Hokay: (Here's the encouragement part ;):
You CAN do this! You're stronger than you know & can beat this thing but it's going to take some real soul-searching & changes in how you're approaching this. You're NOT alone in this. We all (every single last one of us) had to come to this place in order to get & remain clean.
I want you to know that this is YOUR place. Use it for all it's worth! Don't cave today! You're almost over the hump. Stay with us & HOLD FAST! You're worth it. Start believing this. Please, keep posting, vent, ask questions, read, read, read on forum, check out journals & journal if you like. This is a place of miracles. I know I couldn't have gotten this far w/o the love & support of this community. There are plenty of folks here who'll be honored to share their experiences & support you through this & beyond. (I'm one of 'em) Let us know what you're thinking & feeling.
We're here & we're pulling for you!! :)
Thanks so much for your honesty & on reaching out!
I too was an IV heroin addict for many, many years. I know where you're @ right now. It sent shivers down my spine just reading your post. I feel your desperation, 'lostness' & lack of clarity on your situation. Your higher nature -- the part of you crying -- no make that screaming -- out for self-control & self-preservation is what brought you here & I congratulate you on that!
There IS a way out of your chronic misery. You're young, you've only been using for 4 yrs. but the way you describe your use tells me that it's especially important for you to do everything in your power to put the brakes on this, NOW. We're never guaranteed another go round. I lost so many, many friends @ your age (& almost died a couple of times myself) that it started to make me feel unreal & wonder why I was still alive.
Of special concern to me was your mention of shooting 'done & Oxys. Any drug that is meant to be used orally is made to go into the churning acid environment of your stomach which will filter out most of the things that would otherwise harm us. Not so when you IV these same medications. Shooting these drugs can lead to all kinds of serious problems, permanent nerve & vascular damage, gangrene (I've seen it), pneumonia, blockages, cellulitis, liver damage, pneumonia, endocarditis & death to name just a few.
You say that your family & friends have no idea. Well, I'm not so sure & I'm offering the following in the most caring & honest way I can:
In the beginning I used to believe that too but soon realized that people were a lot hipper than I was giving them credit for & that moreover, my As$ was showing. (Meaning, I couldn't see myself clearly & it was patently obvious to many what was going on). People see when your behavior changes, when your moods go up & down, when you lose interest in people, things & activities that you used to care about, when you're broke all the time, when you continuously wear long sleeves, when you've lost weight, when you have to leave places or can't show @ places 'cause you've got to get a fix, when you nod out, when your eyes are pinned or you scratch, when your to ill to function, when you spend too long in the bathroom & come out changed, when you lie or evade....the list goes on. My point is, is that this might not be as big a secret as you currently believe to those close to you. Four years is quite a while. :)
The reason that I'm mentioning this is because as long as you're unwilling to do certain things (& I know it's really scary & that the fear, shame & guilt are huge!) to face this thing head on & put together a smart plan for detox & beyond, It won't work. Why? Because the problem isn't physical. As addicts, out real challenge lies after we kick -- in sitting in our skins -- facing restlessness, grief, boredom & anger or whatever -- without reaching for something to change our chemistries. Think about it, if this weren't the case, then no one would relapse. You will not be able to do this on your own, my friend. Coming here is a GREAT first step but it's key that you block all your sources & come out to a non-judgmental family member, friend, Dr. whatever. It's a huge relief & it levels the playing field for us a bit as when we keep our 'secret', we only have to answer to ourselves & we invariably fall. Our habit controls us. We have to change our very way of thinking, seeing & acting. Doing this the way you've been doing it has never worked before, right? So, why should it work this time? There's a famous quote:
'Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.'
Albert Einstein
That's why you always cave on day 6. (Mine was Day 3;). So, the question is what is it that you're willing to change..to do differently this time?
I know that you want encouragement & I want very badly to give it to you but I can't without telling you what it will Truly take for this to work for you, my friend. :)
Hokay: (Here's the encouragement part ;):
You CAN do this! You're stronger than you know & can beat this thing but it's going to take some real soul-searching & changes in how you're approaching this. You're NOT alone in this. We all (every single last one of us) had to come to this place in order to get & remain clean.
I want you to know that this is YOUR place. Use it for all it's worth! Don't cave today! You're almost over the hump. Stay with us & HOLD FAST! You're worth it. Start believing this. Please, keep posting, vent, ask questions, read, read, read on forum, check out journals & journal if you like. This is a place of miracles. I know I couldn't have gotten this far w/o the love & support of this community. There are plenty of folks here who'll be honored to share their experiences & support you through this & beyond. (I'm one of 'em) Let us know what you're thinking & feeling.
We're here & we're pulling for you!! :)
Hi all just got out of a long hot shower .. It made me feel a little better until I got out .. Go figure ... I really wish my hump day was at day 3 not 6 it gets me down a little bit to know people feel better at day 5 and 6. When here I am at 6 and I feel just as miserable as day 1. I just want to say thank you to everybody that commented on my post. It's a relief to know there are other people out there who have beat this death grip that opiates have over a person. I've looked up the Thomas recipe and I'm already using a few things on it .. I've been reading posts and stories for months trying to have some kind of plan so I can be prepared to beat this. You asked what's different this time ... This time I'm ready .. I made a plan.. I've researched .. I've bought things to help vitamins.. Protein shakes .. Healthy food .. Melatonin .. Benadryl .. Imodium .. And I have a few klonopins I've been saving ... Along with making my first post and actually get some support.. Most the times when I tried to quit I really didn't want so I half did it and that's how i failed ... This time I'm ready there is no looking back ... 5 1/2 hours left till day 7. Still clean.
You will succeed Ashleigh....you read up and made a plan (so did I). I'm not sure why it is taking you longer...perhaps the type of drug and your choice of how to use. I never used a needle...I mean I'm the girl that fainted when my mother had the doctor pierce my ears with a needle lol.
As far as that shower...hey, take as many as you can handle, as hot as you can handle it. For a couple of days I was in a hot bath constantly. It was the only time I felt halfway okay.
I've got you in my prayers ... you will make it through today...tomorrow won't be quite as bad...I'm not saying you will feel great...but you should start feeling an easing of the W/D's. Once you start feeling it ease up you will get some mental relief which, believe it or not, will make the rest of it much easier.
As far as that shower...hey, take as many as you can handle, as hot as you can handle it. For a couple of days I was in a hot bath constantly. It was the only time I felt halfway okay.
I've got you in my prayers ... you will make it through today...tomorrow won't be quite as bad...I'm not saying you will feel great...but you should start feeling an easing of the W/D's. Once you start feeling it ease up you will get some mental relief which, believe it or not, will make the rest of it much easier.
Ashleigh-
I don't know much about where you're at- but I did have a pretty hefty opiate dependence that led to addiction when I found myself in an abusive marriage and very sick.
I want to encourage you and to tell you that no matter how dark it seems right now...there will be light. Nothing is permanent except death and that is where you are headed if you don't stop this thing now.
I cannot stress strongly enough how important it is for you to continue to reach out and to LISTEN especially to IBK and Annie (EvolverU)
These two forces of nature have been where you are and then some, and being taken under their collective wings and being led down YOUR road to recovery would be the VERY BEST THING FOR YOU.
You need to trust them okay?
I know you're scared, I know. And if I could reach through my computer screen and give you a hug and tell you it's gonna be alright, I would.
But I'm gonna send you lot's of white light and energy and pray that you do what you are meant to-
And stop this vicious cycle before it ends with you losing your beautiful life.
xo
Lu
I don't know much about where you're at- but I did have a pretty hefty opiate dependence that led to addiction when I found myself in an abusive marriage and very sick.
I want to encourage you and to tell you that no matter how dark it seems right now...there will be light. Nothing is permanent except death and that is where you are headed if you don't stop this thing now.
I cannot stress strongly enough how important it is for you to continue to reach out and to LISTEN especially to IBK and Annie (EvolverU)
These two forces of nature have been where you are and then some, and being taken under their collective wings and being led down YOUR road to recovery would be the VERY BEST THING FOR YOU.
You need to trust them okay?
I know you're scared, I know. And if I could reach through my computer screen and give you a hug and tell you it's gonna be alright, I would.
But I'm gonna send you lot's of white light and energy and pray that you do what you are meant to-
And stop this vicious cycle before it ends with you losing your beautiful life.
xo
Lu
Purrfectly be glad that you don't like needles ... That's one big mess nobody ever needs to get into. The hot showers help so much I wish I could just say in them all day .. Talking on here and those showers is what has helped me a ton these last few hours .. I hope your right about tomorrow being better :)
Lulu thank you for those words of encouragement I'm pretty terrified that I wont make if out of this dark hole ever. Idk If it's because my day 6 is almost over but I have crazy racing thoughts about just one more fix and all this pain will be over .... The no sleeping is driving me literally crazy .. I think I'm hearing things and stuff.. I know it's the withdrawal but it's very hard to deal with.. It's been amazing to talk with those two and everybody else who has given advice .. Shared their story.. Given ideas to help relieve some of the withdrawal... Encouragement .. And even just listening to me. Thank you. 3 1/2 hours till day 7. Still clean.
Lazyann I've been so caught up in my own misery I forgot to ask how your day 1 is going ?
I just wanted to add my support to the mix. First off, a huge congrats on 6, almost 7 days clean! I know that this is incredibly hard right now. You are in the midst of the fight of your life. The withdrawals are temporary, even if they don't feel like it. You can make it though this! Please stick around and keep posting. We are all here for you, cheering you along, and hoping that you succeed in your journey towards a clean, happy life. Please take care and try to keep your head up.
Hang in there Ashleigh, you should start feeling better soon. You have been given some great advice and support. Consider everything that has been said. I just want to offer my support as well. A couple of things that really helped me, especially with the Restlessness at night is Epsom Salt baths. They feel wonderful and really helped me relax and eventually sleep. Also, some mild exercise and most importantly fresh air. I would try to spend at least 30 minutes outside every day. Even if it is just sitting outside breathing the fresh air. This really helped with fatigue. Try it.
You can do this, and your life will be so much better! Take care, I wish you all the best. Keep posting and let us know how you are doing.
You can do this, and your life will be so much better! Take care, I wish you all the best. Keep posting and let us know how you are doing.
Thanks for all the positive vibes guys :) .. These last few hours have horrible .. I'm filled with anxiety about never feeling good or even normal ever again ... I know it's just the withdrawals talking.. Thank you for the Epsom salt idea .. When I'm done with this post I'm gonna try it out and hopefully feel a little better and get some relief .. 50 minutes till day 7. Still clean.
I guess this question is for everybody ... How long were you in acute withdrawal? Like the aches the pain .. Hot and cold shivers .. Goosebumps .. Sweating .. RLS ...All of those kind of things
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