Helping Husband Detox from Meth

[ronayne1984]

My husband has recently decided to quit meth cold turkey after about 4 months of use. The past four months he moved back to his home town and started hanging out in his old neighborhood where everyone does meth. He grew up around it from a very young and age and started using when he was 12. He just turned 30 this past year. When he first met almost 6 years ago he was clean and had weaned himself off of it but slowly over the years he let the addiction get to him and he started taking pain pills, having a affair and moving 8 hours aways and doing meth. He would call every few days, saying how much he loved me and our boys and wanting to come home, begging me to come and get him. This past weekend I went to visit him and told him it was completely up to him whether he came home or not but if he still wanted to i wanted him home and they only thing i ask of him is to quit the drugs completely. (he had already said before how he wanted to be come home and be clean)
My question is, now he is home, been home for two days...most of it just sleeping, moody at times and eating ALOT. I have read so much on detoxing from meth and know it can take weeks and weeks. What can I do to help him? How should I treat him? Right now I am making sure he has lots to eat and and drink, and just letting him sleep as much as possible. I talk to him when he is awake and I try not to get into to heavy of conversation, i just try to keep it light, make little jokes and make sure to tell him how much i love him. He is kinda cold toward me at times right now and I understand that, should I just keep doing what I am doing and let him come to me for affection (not simply sex but just hugging and cuddling). I don't want him to feel unwanted but at the same time i am trying to let him work through the detox. It has been 4 days since he used last, if that is helpful at all. Any suggestions, tips, advice or personal experiences from either side would be helpful. I told him today how proud I am of him for coming home and choosing to be clean and he seemed to get upset by it. He said I shouldn't be proud of him b/c he didn't stop for me or him and he only stopped for the boys. He also stated that if he can't stay clean this time he will just submit to it and move back away. I know most of what he says is probably just the drugs talking and I really don't know how to respond.

[thumper52]

Quite honestly, your a whole lot kinder to him than I would have been. I'd be getting him blood tested for STD & HIV before letting him near me, as you say he's been on drugs and having an affair. Only one?   Take blessed good care of you and your boys as well...WOMAN first, MOTHER second, WIFE third. Be smart. You cannot make his life bright if he isn't up to facing whatever has turned him back, more than once.
If he is going to be keeping straight...the only way for him to prove it is to get to a clinic/Doc for his blood tests, and to a Psychologist or some certified drug counselor. Go for marriage counselling when ready to re-commit.  But the only way to help him, is to be a strong intelligent woman who LOVES HERSELF.
Best wishes in all your recoveries.  Your the one needing the hugs right now. Good luck my Dear.

[ronayne1984]

thank you so much for the advice. I have given him vitamins, and ensure drinks plus just making sure that we have lots of healthy foods in the house. I read somewhere that you should limit sugars while detoxing and caffeine. He lost about 40lbs in the past four months and yes he is extremely weak. it has only been three days since he has been home and four days since his last use. he has several friends here that do not use drugs at all and the ones he was using with have all moved out the area. he is complaining alot of lower back pain and stomach pain. I assume the stomach pain is primarily due to getting used to having food in his stomach.

[ActingBrandNew]

Yeah....Im like Weaver, its been a long time since I used meth but I do remember the come down. It takes time. Weaver gave great advice...the only thing I will add is to encourage some physical exercise. I know from personal experience that my body would recover faster when I exercised. Im sure he just wants to sleep it all off but the physical part of the recovery process will take a lot longer. A nice walk...some pushups.....something. :)

Good luck

[weaver71]

Give him good nutrition, vitamin, amino acids, and EmergenC. Those will help his body have what it needs to heal. The body makes it's own speed, but stops during addictive use. It is like intense for him due to the fact he has a history with the drug and his brain remembers that. We go back to where we left of when we start again. Give him space. Once he starts to get up and move around, he will still be low energy. That is when he needs to go to NA, Church, counseling, anything he can to deal with why he ended up where he is. Quitting for someone else rarely sticks. He has to realize he is doing it for himself, that he wants a better life. If any of his old using buddies are clean now, it would be helpful to call them. You are in a tough place, give him a little time, but don't let him suck you into that world. Meetings will help him make new friends and see happy people off of drugs. It will take awhile to make new sober memories to get him back on track. I haven't used meth for a long time, but definitely remember the crash. It's kindof a waiting game right now.