Aa
Seeking encouragement on my journey to FREEDOM - tapering from Suboxone AGAIN
I am in the process of tapering from Suboxone long-term use. I'm down to almost 1 mg. I've done this before but got scared when it came time to jump and made a bad decision to get some short lasting opiates to help thru the bad parts then got back on Suboxone and spent the last four years maintaining. But a lot has happened since then: a divorce from an abusive husband, moving to another state, finishing College, buying a house and getting a good job. I feel beyond ready now. Just tired of this monkey on my back. After reading my previous posts from 4 years ago I was discouraged to see how close I was to being free when I messed up and reading other people's posts about the horrors of Suboxone was also discouraging. No wonder I was so scared to jump! so I'm moving forward! No one in my life knows except my doctor so I thought it was time to join the community again. I felt good yesterday I took about 1.2 mg. today I've only taken 1 mg and I'm feeling pretty rough. I've been taking 1/3 of a 4mg strip, so 1.33 mg for about a month but it seems like the lower my dose gets the harder each taper is. From what I read this is normal I'm starting to try to work out and I've also started taking a nutritional supplement full of vitamins including B vitamins to help with the energy because that seems to be one of the worst things. I also had my doctor write me a prescription for Gabapentin (a low dose) which I know helped me tremendously before with restless legs. For the last few days trying to get down to 1 mg I feel my anxiety increasing. I'm not really hurting bad but I feel like I'm getting the flu. My life is pretty stable right now emotionally and spiritually so I feel like it's a good time to get off - that and I just hate being on this medication that has such a horrible stigma, that I have to keep hidden and that I'm bound by. I guess the one bad thing is I work a professional job and cannot skip work. I have to go (and perform well) even when I don't feel like it. Also this time around I've been on it almost 5 years not just one like last time. So anyway, encouragement is welcome. And if you have any insight into what may help with the flu like symptoms. I've read a lot and been through it once but your input and encouragement are still very welcome to me.
10 months sober now!
2 Comments
It's been another 20 days. How are you feeling?
3 Comments
I am down to 0.5 milligrams per day and planned to go to every other day for two weeks then every third day for two before I take the final step. Did you find that that prolonged the problem by tapering so low or that it was a good thing?
Tapering works best. I tried jumping off at 1mg and didn't succeed. Then I tried again at .8...I know it's not much lower but Im on day 6 and I'm not going back. Time is my emeny and my friend right now. I would have like to taper down to ,12 but I had priorities. Good luck!
Bsaved- I think every one is different! I was working 40-60 hrs a week so I think tapering to .125 was best since I couldn't take off but honestly I had the hardest time getting from .66 to .5 I think. so I believe I could have jumped there but it was nice that once I did jump it was no worse so I knew I could just keep going without day after day - now 3 and a half weeks! Sorry I can't be more specific I think you just have to listen to your own body and your situation. I often questioned if I was prolonging the agony which is why I say I think if I could have taken a few weeks off work I may have just jumped at .5 mg...or .25 but continuing my taper worked for me. Hope this helps. Whatever you do just keep moving forward even if it's slowly - as long as you're not going backwards you're still doing good!
Same for you suzy- keep pushing! If I can do this y'all can! Be patient with yourself.
Same for you suzy- keep pushing! If I can do this y'all can! Be patient with yourself.
72 hrs!
3 Comments
Congratulations! I’ve been sub free for 2 years now. It takes a good bit, but you’re going to feel so much better in the long run. You’ve done this in a much better way than I did. Tapering was not an option for me. I hope to see you having more and more success each day.
Ty ty! 5 days now! Falling asleep has been difficult, fatigue during the day and the stomach issues have started but I'm still moving FORWARD! Hoping symptoms last less time then some at such a low dose jumping - but if not it's ok - I'm realistic and celebrate each day as a little victory!
Ps. And the symptoms haven't been any worse than some of my difficult tapers so I KNOW I CAN DO THIS!
Stable on .125 mg per day. Been at this dose for about a month - been testing the water so to speak lengthening the hours between .06mg doses 12-24hrs - thinking the jump won't be any harder than some of my tapers at this point (based upon severity of symptoms). 2 more weeks and my crazy work schedule will ease up and then I'm jumping! Just wanted to check in.
3 Comments
Completely off April 7!will be a month feeling good
Completely off April 7!will be a month feeling good
This is awesome! You should be very proud of yourself and all your hard work. Just remember...you need some type of program in place once you're completely done i.e., N/A, A/A, Celebrate Recovery, counseling, something. This helps to ensure we don't end up here again!
try kicking with CBD oil it is non-addicting and relaxes you no high.. Google: Kicking methadone and CBD oil. You can buy it on-line without prescription. Also cures cancer and are using it for Children seizures and autoimmune diseases,etc.
I’ve been on suboxin for four years ,taking 1/4 of a piece a day the smallest piece the eye can see why is it so hard for me to get off ?
9 Comments
Any pointers
Just keep moving forward! Every taper is one step closer! When you're ready you can do it. One more month and I'm jumping! I think you have to want freedom bad enough to go through the pain. if we can go through the pain of tapering this far we can jump. Are you on 1/4 of an 8mg or 4 or 2?
Ps. And it's hard for you to get off because suboxone is strong! It's hard for most people to get off after being on it this long. But it is possible! I posted a good article on this thread from a dr. Who successfully tapers people off. It has a LOT of good info. Scroll up some and if you can't find it I'll repost after work. It talks about the chemical aspect of getting off Suboxone and what to expect.
www.pbod.org/detoxing-suboxone-fear-caused-lack-knowledge/
I have took my self off completely, but I’m going through it how long will thi last
I don't think there an easy answer - everyone is different. From my research the physical pain isn't but a week or so. The longest lasting symptom is lethargy. I've read the average is 30 days from a low dose. How many mg. Did you jump from? What symptoms are you having?
I used a corner of a strip a day , the smallest piece u can see with your eye
I can’t smell, heart racing headache , how long does this last?
I jumped completely off on the 7th of March, am I almost there yet
I scanned in like 100 pages of documents and sent them off to my accountant this weekend. I always wait until late in the season, so that means tax time is almost done! One piece of advice I wanted to share is something I got from an addiction specialist when I quit back in 2012: There is a big piece of your life that is involved in the finding, storing, measuring, administering, and tracking of pills (or strips or bags or whatever your DOC is). I can tell by the way you’re so specific about dosage amounts that you’re very organized about this stuff (as I was as well). Finding a healthy hobby or pastime or activity to fill that void might serve you well. I was really proactive and tried several things at once, but what worked for me was carefully tracking, planning, and analyzing swim workouts. Art, music, crafting...there are any number of things that will give your mind something to seize on as a substitute.
One other thing: My observation based solely on years of reading this site is that you’ve tapered far and away more than most people do before jumping. I respect your methods and understand your constraints around work. But there will come a time when you’ll be simply prolonging your suffering by continuing to taper without jumping. Once you’re out of crunch time, make the jump! It is scary, but you can do it!
One other thing: My observation based solely on years of reading this site is that you’ve tapered far and away more than most people do before jumping. I respect your methods and understand your constraints around work. But there will come a time when you’ll be simply prolonging your suffering by continuing to taper without jumping. Once you’re out of crunch time, make the jump! It is scary, but you can do it!
1 Comments
I'm back down to .125 mg and I don't think there's another taper left (not much lower I can really go) - as soon as crunch time is over I'm definitely jumping! I'm ready. If I've made it this far I can jump - less than four weeks left which seems like eternity but it will be here before we know it.
Took .125mg the last two days. Woke up this morning feeling like I was going through full-blown opiate withdrawals and thought what the heck why did I ever get on this stuff?!?!?!
3 Comments
Because we thought it would help us, that's why!!! Lol How are you doing so far...you've come such a long where i KNOW your nit going to turn back now. Are you taking good multivitamin and eating uber heathy? Water, water and water!!! At this point i am going to suggest music...good, happy, up beat music (it helped me tremendously) also watching comics (things that will make you laugh really hard), that will help as well. You see the light, at the end of that tunnel....i know you see it....keep moving forwards...like a knight!
I am taking a multi vitamin and drinking water and listening to good up beat music! It helps but this still sucks. I'm just dragging myself thru the days. probably tmi but I'm an accountant and it's tax season which is why work is so brutal and impossible to miss so I went back up to .18 mg every 24 hrs - nothing crazy just trying to manage (and this amount is) - think maybe I got too zealous about being off this and thought maybe i was ready to jump... (waited 20 hours between .0625mg doses! but not quiet ready yet I guess- It was diarrhea aches nausea and all that mess) if i have to wait another month until tax season is over to "jump" when I can miss work its not the end of the world - trying to give myself a break and stop stressing so much. I'm going to just keep stretching out the hours between doses to make the jump as easy as possible (though not anticipating painless). I'm so close I'd rather take it slow than fail. I'm not trying to prolong the misery - just waiting for the right timing. My timing on this sucks. It's just so crazy - I could have felt this bad for less time 5 years ago jumping off hydrocodone - but we live and learn (sometimes the hard way) and never go back! I don't have cravings or want to "use" I just want to be done with this and feel like a normal human again! I really hope jumping at this low a dose won't take as long withdrawing from as some stories I've heard. We'll see. Thank you Melissa for your advice and encouragement. It means more than I can express.
that's POINT 18 btw not 18mg. I know it sounds crazy but slowly seems to be working for me.
Finally stabilized on .25 mg Day 2 on .18 mg... really don't think I can jump yet working so many hours but I'm not going backwards. Just taking one day at a time doing the best I can and seeking strength and peace from God. He's bigger than my giants. I pray he'll take this burden away if it's His will but understand too if it's something I just have to endure to come out stronger and never go back.
It's a roller coaster ride with ups and downs with in the same day- sometimes the same hour. I CAN'T WAIT TO BE FREE AGAIN! But I do wait because I can't miss weeks of work so I just keep struggling through the days knowing it won't be like this forever (slowly but surely). I'm so close. I REFUSE to go backward. I'm 33. Too much of my life and energy have been spent on this. I'm ready to move FORWARD. I'm struggling physically but I have hope and I have not lost faith. I'm at .25mg per day. Very soon I will jump. One hour at a time...
2 Comments
I wanted to give you a piece of advice I was given around 6 months into recovery.
"ANYTHING, you put in front of your recovery......you will eventually loose"
I was at a time when I felt like well, things are getting back on track, bills are being paid (on time I might add, lol) but husband wasn't. He was starting to feel a bit neglected b/c I jumped into recovery head first. So to appease him I started slacking off on meetings and step work. It wasn't long before I found myself in a situation where I wanted to use....REALLY FREAKIN BAD! I called my sponsor and she was like well...been going to meetings (nope), been working your step work (nope), been in touch with other addicts (nope)....what did you expect. I have to remember that I have all of these things, husband, children, work, yoga, friends, family, etc....a good freaking life....because of N/A. Your recovery must come first....If you take care of yourself, it makes you a better partner, lover and friend! Just a tidbit....
Much Love,
Melissa
"ANYTHING, you put in front of your recovery......you will eventually loose"
I was at a time when I felt like well, things are getting back on track, bills are being paid (on time I might add, lol) but husband wasn't. He was starting to feel a bit neglected b/c I jumped into recovery head first. So to appease him I started slacking off on meetings and step work. It wasn't long before I found myself in a situation where I wanted to use....REALLY FREAKIN BAD! I called my sponsor and she was like well...been going to meetings (nope), been working your step work (nope), been in touch with other addicts (nope)....what did you expect. I have to remember that I have all of these things, husband, children, work, yoga, friends, family, etc....a good freaking life....because of N/A. Your recovery must come first....If you take care of yourself, it makes you a better partner, lover and friend! Just a tidbit....
Much Love,
Melissa
Oh Melissa, I know you're right. This was probably one of the reasons I failed last time - I was juggling school work and a demanding husband. At least this time it's only work. And my bf knows and luckily understands my recovery needs to come first. He reminds me sometimes too. even though he's never been through this. It's just tough - juggling things. Its tough even when you aren't an addict! I can't say work is all bad though- it keeps me busy and I can't imagine sitting at home all day just thinking and hurting. Just wish the hours weren't so long right now. Still, I wouldn't get so stressed if I didn't put work right up there in priorities with recovery - i think part of its a mind thing. I'm too hard on myself when I can't do everything 100 percent - it's like you've said, gotta be ok with not being ok for a little bit.
*Disclosure- don't read this if you need encouragement. I'm venting and having a tough time.*
I spoke tooooo soon!!! :-( So I was having a good day - emotions and senses heightened but still OK - decided to wait longer to take my .125 mg dose - I usually take it at 2 to make it thru the rest of my work day (I'm working 11 hour days) but I wanted to see how long I could go and maybe not take it at all. I only made it until 5 pm. By 4:30 my anxiety was MAXED out. I have the one and only cubicle in the MIDDLE of the office and I can hear smell and see everything! It's the worst scenario for over-active senses. I also stare at small numbers on a computer screen all day. Just some info...anyway...so by 4:30 pm I think everyone in the office had their glade pug ins turned up on full blast (PLEASE tell me if there is something that will take away my sense of smell for a while!!) - I was shaking my leg wanting to scream until they took me out in a straight jacket (I didn't though. I bit my lip until 6:30 and left almost running!) On my way home (in the dark) I got behind two fire trucks with lights on. (My head was already pounding at this point from the small numbers and strong glade.) It seems by the time I get off work I have a headache EVERYDAY and the car lights are already extra bright right now. I'm finally home - body hurts and I feel nauseous and my dog is whining wanting to play because I've been gone all day.....UGH! Can I really do this while working 11 hour days 6 days a week? I really don't want to wait any longer. I want to be DONE with this!!!!!!!!!!! I don't know what to do. My boyfriend tries to talk me through it but he's never been through it so sometimes I just want to scoff at him and tell him he doesn't understand - but I don't because I know how lucky I am to have him sticking by my irritable side. I want to go to a meeting to talk to people who actually do understand but HOW do I find the time when I'm so tired after work I want to die? Yes my sobriety is very important to me but so is work - I have bills and I live by myself and support myself. I realize this post is extremely pessimistic but I needed to vent - really just want to cry. This rollercoaster is tough - the downs can't be anticipated enough. I'm just overwhelmed and exasperated right now. PRAYING tomorrow will be better.
I spoke tooooo soon!!! :-( So I was having a good day - emotions and senses heightened but still OK - decided to wait longer to take my .125 mg dose - I usually take it at 2 to make it thru the rest of my work day (I'm working 11 hour days) but I wanted to see how long I could go and maybe not take it at all. I only made it until 5 pm. By 4:30 my anxiety was MAXED out. I have the one and only cubicle in the MIDDLE of the office and I can hear smell and see everything! It's the worst scenario for over-active senses. I also stare at small numbers on a computer screen all day. Just some info...anyway...so by 4:30 pm I think everyone in the office had their glade pug ins turned up on full blast (PLEASE tell me if there is something that will take away my sense of smell for a while!!) - I was shaking my leg wanting to scream until they took me out in a straight jacket (I didn't though. I bit my lip until 6:30 and left almost running!) On my way home (in the dark) I got behind two fire trucks with lights on. (My head was already pounding at this point from the small numbers and strong glade.) It seems by the time I get off work I have a headache EVERYDAY and the car lights are already extra bright right now. I'm finally home - body hurts and I feel nauseous and my dog is whining wanting to play because I've been gone all day.....UGH! Can I really do this while working 11 hour days 6 days a week? I really don't want to wait any longer. I want to be DONE with this!!!!!!!!!!! I don't know what to do. My boyfriend tries to talk me through it but he's never been through it so sometimes I just want to scoff at him and tell him he doesn't understand - but I don't because I know how lucky I am to have him sticking by my irritable side. I want to go to a meeting to talk to people who actually do understand but HOW do I find the time when I'm so tired after work I want to die? Yes my sobriety is very important to me but so is work - I have bills and I live by myself and support myself. I realize this post is extremely pessimistic but I needed to vent - really just want to cry. This rollercoaster is tough - the downs can't be anticipated enough. I'm just overwhelmed and exasperated right now. PRAYING tomorrow will be better.
One day at a time... every day is hard now it seems but it's tolerable. I haven't lost my mind just yet.
It's really cool to have your pharmacist say "did you go down again?!" And give you a high five when you go pick up your meds. I said yep - hopefully this is the last one :-) feeling excited and proud.
Well...day 2 on point 33 mg - it sucks. Every muscle in my body hurts and my limbs feel like they weigh 500 lbs but this too shall pass just gotta keep moving fwd... one day at a time. Glad it's the weekend and I'm not working 6 days a week just yet.
Symptoms come a lot faster at this low dose. Usually takes 3-4 days to feel real bad but not now - just one. I do feel cruddy most of the time now so I'm going to make my next few tapers quick (or at least that's the plan) because I do think maybe at this point I'm prolonging it - this is just my personal experience and everyone is different. My doctor isn't telling me what to do; he's letting me make the decisions but is on board. I honestly think he thinks I could stop at any moment but I'm not so sure so he's going to let me jump when I'm ready which is better I think - to feel empowered vs. Forced. It gives me a reason to be proud of doing it.
Going down to .33 mg tomorrow. Yes, POINT 33 - 1/6 of a 2 mg strip. Wish me luck. It won't be long now before I make the jump.
Dang that should have said a 1/2 (a half) of a milligram instead of 1/5 LOL but I'm still very happy about it. In fact this taper was not as bad. I don't know if it's because I stayed on .66 mg longer or maybe the worst is over? Not saying I expect to feel good but I'm still relieved it was better then the last one. I'm thankful for the little victories and hurdles surpassed.
I finally told my boyfriend and I'm so glad I did! He was understanding, supportive and now I don't feel I have to do this completely alone.
Finally stable on .66 mg.
2 Comments
I don’t know anything about suboxene witheard it’sy all the same. Opioids, heroin, and suboxene . I’m back on opioids been for years now, I went cold turkey back in 2014, and after the 7 day no more withdrawel, I felt like hell though, no energy and my job is very demanding. And after 3 months my brain told me, a half won’t hurt. **** **** shoot me now! I’m doing worse at 50-80 mg of hydrocodone. I hate it. Before I went cold turkey I was only at 30-40 mg. For 8 months and for 10 year on one 7.5 mg a day. And from 1995-2002 did maybe 5 a month total and 5 mg at that. My tolerance is high now. I know it’s a mind thing. I am in a lot of pain as well. I have degenerative disk disease, both arms fractured, and ligaments torn, right one acl and mcl tear, arthritis in hip back knee , fibromyalgia , nerve pain, nerve damage ,now knots are forming in my fingers the docs don’t know anything about, it’s freaking sad cause I’m hurting but I also hate I’m a addict! I feel I can’t go thru the withdrawals again they were horrible for me no tapering, and I had the sneezing sick feeling coughing yawning, so it could be the withdrawal . I really wish I could afford the weismann treatment. One is $20000 in Beverly Hills and another is $8000, but heck I can’t afford neither. They don’t take insurance either. But all you have to deal with is the mind issue. If I could just stop I wouldn’t go back a second time. Sorry for rambling, it feels good talking to someone about this. It’s just so hard cause withdrawel of any kind needs at least a month of no work, and that’s not a option for me. Trump made it a national emergency but what are they doing about it, how about give us treatments that are affordable. Good Luck! Prayers and strength for you!
I'm so sorry you're going through this I do understand! Especially about the work thing. I'm just toughing it out still and that's a lot of why I'm tapering because I can't take a month off work. Even tapering is hard but I'm managing. I too thought I could take just one when I relapsed after 6 years of being clean. And I believe I was on a similar amount of hydrocodone when I began taking the Suboxone but I'm not recommending that. if I could do it again I probably would have taken a long weekend and went through the withdrawals versus years of struggling with the Suboxone. But it's not been all bad - it's just taking me a lot longerto be free. Prayers for you too and remember you're not alone. the sooner you can come up with a game plan to tackle this demon the sooner you'll be free and it will be behind you. I also never want to have to go through this again.
Today is worse than last night. Am i getting a cold or experiencing withdrawals? Legs feel better but Body feels like I'm fighting an infection. I'm sweaty then cold, head hurts and soooo tired. Lord give me strength!
4 Comments
Hey KLB84. . Day 26 for me off buprenorphine (sub w/o naloxone). . I have been on bup for 5 years 16 mg daily for pain. I've seen your hellacious taper posts. I've been dealing with bup and in the field I work for bup docs. Once your down that low of dose and youre that sick, you are actually perpetuating the acute withdraw. I tapered myself from 16 mg to 4mg in 5 days. Then i jumped. First 8 days are gonna be brutal. But the insidious part of the withdrawal is the dysphoria and malaise. Those last 6 after your acute. Your sick but you don't have many symptoms but your endorphins are shot and there's no reuptake of inhibitors. Im not gonna lie im so exhausted from being exhausted. I took Tramadol at the beginning which helped a lot but its a taper. Not meant for long term. Basically just to get me to the dysphoria and malaise. Lucky f'ing me. But I do know you'll wake up one of those days and you'll know u beat. I got off subs in jail 12 years ago but was on 2 mg for only 6 months. I just had the 7 days and it was over. This is different. 5 years.. I'm legit consumed by feeling bad. If you really want off and your down to .5 mg or under 1mg, jump. Cuz all these acute symptoms will be gone after 8 days instead of going thru weeks of tapers that leave you feeling like this anyways. Just know I'm going thru this bs too. I have great support but support don't take away bup withdraw fr.
6 weeks. . Sorry spell check deleted weeks. It's 6 weeks of malaise and dysphoria. That's the same answer from 50 other people like me that I know that beat it.
Sheesh I jyst don't know - I'm working about 55 hrs a wk and will lose my job if I don't - don't think I could handle feeling any worse. I do hear what you're Saying about prolonging the wds though... i know that's potentially what I'm doing but I did get stable on .83 mg so I thought I could do the same on .66 or .5 etc. I think I may actually be sick not just withdrawing. I now have a cough and a lot of muss in my chest (tis the season) - or could this be caused from the taper??? Not sure. It's only been a wk at .66 keep thinking I'll feel better soon :-/
Mucus* not muss lol stupid auto correct.
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
