I'm so sorry for your experience. Yes, you definitely traded a minimal habit for a much bigger one!
Are you still on the sub?
I agree that it is primarily about making money. Maybe there are some good, caring doctors out there but... I don't think that is primarily the case. My sub doc seemed compassionate, even set up a payment plan for me, but then dropped me when I couldn't pay for my follow-up visit on the spot. (My first visit was REDUCED to $288, not including Rx, even though I am on Medicaid.)
I was taking less than 50mg of Vicodin (or an equivalent) and this doctor thought Subutex was a good choice for me, starting at 4mg up to 24mg a day prescribed.
I'm not sure how much is this particular doctor or just the system. I honestly feel that a doctor prescribing me a handful of Vics a day (50mg was a MAX dose) would have been safer, especially as I was dealing with pain issues as well. My primary doc cut me off opiates and I couldn't handle the pain and cravings while my husband was keeping his own painkillers in the house (but wasn't comfortable sharing with me). Talk about trading a habit for a worse habit, not to mention seemingly endless side effects with Subox.
I have had the exact same experience. I was on about 4mg/day and had a major break up and moved, and sort of blamed all my problems on suboxone when in reality it was helping me immensely...so i went off, relapsed mightily (long story) then back to nothing for a few months, no subs nothing. And I was depressed as hell. I had been totally 100% clean for a little over 9 weeks, and there was just this fog over me. I then made the active decision to go back on them. For me, they help my life, I feel better, and they keep me away from worse ****. And, I feel pretty much NO side effects. I take a strip in the morning and thats it, done. No different than the next person who takes X other pill or whatever. My main point is that people unfortunately demonize suboxone, which is a miracle drug FOR OPIATE ADDICTS. There is also some pending research, which I personally believe will be expanded on in the coming years, regarding its potential with alcohol and depression, but thats beside the point...Suboxone is known to cause SIGNIFICANTLY less side effects compared to full agonists and especially the (shudder) M-DONE. I urge anybody considering it to bite the bullet, its harder to stabilize on suboxone but infinitely worth it and any habit can eventually be controlled by it, it just might take a little while, even a week or so, but go the sub route, if only for the sake of the ridiculous daily trek to the clinic :(, I always feel bad about that, that would be annoying as HELL
Thanks weaver71 for your comment ive been on subs for 8-9 years awhile ago my doctor and I have decided to go long term im really scared to detox and after reading this im terrified of effects and what they can do to my body and had my doubts that side effects were minimal I know your not a doctor but some advice and a little info on what you know about this drug would be great cause I love suboxone they make my depressing days go by so much better and I was an addict from opiates for some years and subs saved me if not for them id be dead don't know what to do. any help would be so helpful Thank you, Sincerely kiddcyr
Great Post Nursegirl, as always you are a great advocate on the board, I Myself have not used Subs but It did save my friends life and she was on it under a great doctor and she is off now and it helped her get her life together and get into a good program to stay clean, I think used properly under a good doctor it can be successful but long term use from what I have read is not good over a year it gets harder and harder to get away from long term side effects.
Like nursegirl said do your homework find a good doctor and I Know Weaver used it to help him and it worked great.
i also definitely agree this medication Subs should never be taken just for a quick fix it needs to be given by a Doctor and a program be set up and a plan. Good Luck and God Bless :)
Thank you very much for posting that. That is the way I felt the first time I took an opiate. not buzzed out but very clear headed and sped up and totally unencumbered by negative emotion. I could have said the exact same thing as is said about sub. I do value my sobriety but sometimes I think that there is a pleasure and focus that is just missing . I wind myself up every day and drive myself though. I am so happy to not have to wake up and take something or have to worry about a distant or not so distant future where I have to jump off of the cliff and come off of another vicious addiction.
Thank you weaver ! ;)