Aa
Need support
I am going to try on go cold turkey again tomorrow using a variation of the Thomas recipe and I'm scared and alone I am on 50 to 60 mg of oxycodone and can't take one more minute of this hell I did this a month ago and made it 8 days and went back please I really need support. I have taken Monday off and my husband is home and not working right now so I'm going to say it's the flu. I am so disappointed in myself. I was sober for a long time and was diagnosed with breast cancer in 09 had a total mastectomy and chemotherapy and here I am I have come off these at least ten times in 2 hrs and everyone in my family is in recovery and I've been able to hide this. The worst part is my youngest son just came clean with his habit and here I am lying this is killing me. My son has 28 days. I'm crying as I write this praying someone responds I'm in rough shape. I have enough pills and see the Dr on Tuesday. If I don't do it now I have 2 weeks off from work in December and I could do it then but I'm afraid something really bad is right around the corner I've been reading these boards for a month the last time I detoxed all these posts helped so much but because I have not joined the community I had no encouragement last time I detoxed. My question is can someone please support me through this I don't feel strong like I did last time. I took high doses of Valium and it wasn't that bad but my habit was less and I stabilized for awhile at 40 mg. Sorry I'm going on and on it's thanksgiving and I'm cooking for my family and feel like a piece of crap.
HI :) .... we will be here for you, sure !! Now, don't beat you, what is done is done... you have been through a lot and sometimes we may feel that life is a never ending fight and it is not fair but it is the way it is and we keep fighting and living....you can do it, Sharon. I didn't trust myself too much when i quitted last time but i did it... just take a step forward, then another step forward .... each time, each hour at a time....
OMG you have no idea how much it means to me that you responded. I am so afraid of this detox and I have done it before. I'm praying for help and here you are it's amazing that little flicker of hope grew when I saw someone respond. I want so much for today to be it but this evil addiction is trying tobconvince me if I wait until I have more time off it would be better. Last month when I went cold turkey after the 3rd day and tapering down off the Valium so I realty shouldn't be saying cold turkey should be Thomas recipe I needed to stay busy. My son is my inspiration right now and he's coming home for xmass sober.
Hi Sharon, I agree with Laurel!
Our addiction wants us to beat ourselves up so we will keep using. It's designed that way. Our addiction thrives on lies, secrets and self loathing. I wish you could tell everyone so you can see that the people who love you won't judge you, they just want you to be clean and love yourself. But I know it's hard to reveal the truth.
I really hope you put down the drugs now and not wait until Dec. I can't tell you how many times I told myself, just one more refill and then I will ween. But that is a lie my addictive brain told me everytime.
There will never be the perfect time. The time is now. Most everyone here knows how scary it is. I was terrified. But I took it one hour at a time.
I now have 67 days!
You can do this. Just keep posting and try your best to stay in the moment!
Our addiction wants us to beat ourselves up so we will keep using. It's designed that way. Our addiction thrives on lies, secrets and self loathing. I wish you could tell everyone so you can see that the people who love you won't judge you, they just want you to be clean and love yourself. But I know it's hard to reveal the truth.
I really hope you put down the drugs now and not wait until Dec. I can't tell you how many times I told myself, just one more refill and then I will ween. But that is a lie my addictive brain told me everytime.
There will never be the perfect time. The time is now. Most everyone here knows how scary it is. I was terrified. But I took it one hour at a time.
I now have 67 days!
You can do this. Just keep posting and try your best to stay in the moment!
right, Innerstrength, if we follow ourselves, it would never be the right time when in fact, we know that "not taking the next dose" is the perfect " day "..
we will be here, Sharon... what do you have from the thomas recipe ?
we will be here, Sharon... what do you have from the thomas recipe ?
~Were all here to support you sweetie!! Stay close to the forum and I know you can do this. The day before I C/T off of percocets I DVR'd all my shows and ordered some books online to read. I laid in bed with my laptop and between periods when I felt like it i came to this site. Keep that goal in mind,,xmas and remind yourself when you feel weak that you want to be sober for xmas not only for yourself but your son as well. I read the whole NA book online as well. I also journal a lot my feelings and symptoms because these folks here are the only ones that truly understood and in my weakest moments they responded. They felt my pain and cared about me. I feel your pain now, Im not too far ahead of you today is 15days for me and I feel 90% better, we are all here for you!~Bkitty
valium, immodium vitamins ,minerals ,potassium,. I also got some hylands restless leg pills with quinine, L- tryosine and B6 caps. I loaded up with everything from every recipe dextromethorpan pedialite detox tea.Valerian. You name it I have it, Actually I'm not sure what to take. I do have one close friend in recovery who knows and is supporting me but I can't tell my family right now. When I detoxed last month all I really needed was the Valium and the Ambien,and stayed in bed and was up on day 3 and started weaning the Valium. I have detoxed off benzos and dont want to pick up that habit againI need to be very careful with the Valium and have my friend come get my oxycodone tonight. I'm afraid that 60mg is too high a dose but I was on 80 last week I have cut down. I have read here about people being on a lot more. I'm afraid it will be worse because I did it last month. Am I crazy I having terrible nightmares and work is getting impossible and I have a great job. Anyone know that feeling when you know that something really horrible (as if watching my life pass me by not being present for everyone I love isn't bad enough) is about to happen because I'm praying and asking for help. Sorry I'm ranting trying to figure out where to start last time I took the Valium when I woke up instaed of an oxy and watched TV in bed for days. But I've been reading horror stories and I'm really scared.
~Everyone is different! I know the "impending doom" feeling as well. I felt like the whole world could see inside my head and all my thoughts and feelings. That is the depression that the pills cause. Our dopamine is all messed up from the pills and the abuse of them. I too have a great job. You also need to look closely at why you are using the pills,,did they give you that energy you needed to get thru the day and you felt like you could do more. Depression often times is an issues coming off the pills and for me was far worse than the physical w/d. You are definately prepared! You have all the stuff you need!. There will be other members that will be on later to recommend the supplements that help the best-I did not use any. I take a vitamin and anti depressants. You will do this! ~Bkitty
Wow 15 days awesome if you don't mind my asking how many mg og percs and how did you detox. and yes I have books, movies and shows DVR'd.
The best advice that will increase anyone success of detox is to eliminate your options to get the drug or anything like it. As addicts we choose a drug or substance that helped us feel better. So when we were depressed we found that the drug was an easy way out. When we felt withdrawal, the drug was the easy way to feel better. By eliminating your ability to get your hands on the drug before your withdrawl. Deleting all your contacts on your cell, talking openly to your doctor about your addiction and withdrawls will help.
Don't try to control your urges or addiction when it happens but rather take control of your addiction before it happens and try to make grabbing the drug or replase the hard way out. Take control before it takes control over you again!
Don't try to control your urges or addiction when it happens but rather take control of your addiction before it happens and try to make grabbing the drug or replase the hard way out. Take control before it takes control over you again!
I agree completely with Lucky above,,I went cold turkey off taking 10-15 pills a day of 10/325mg perks.So 100-150mg of oxycodone. I just quit. I was done. I felt that shift in me and was at a point in my life that if I didnt get some help I was going to loose everything I worked so hard for. I chose me. I addressed the depression early on around day 4-5 and was put on medication and it helped sooo much.
I know you're right I need to not refill my script this month. My appt is on Tues. And I'm hoping to be 4 days sober by then and not get a refill last month when I detoxed I had 300 pills gave them to someone but obviously I got them back and here I am again. I know you're right just can't go there right now to scary and too much pressure hopefully I can get there in the next 3 days. Can anyone tell me if they have used the Thomas recipe and what they were taking is 60 mg of oxycodone a really high dose. I did it off of 40 and it was tough but doable but I wanted it so much and now I can't seem to muster the determination no idea why.
Hi Sharon, I know how you feel.. I am trying to get off Pf oxys too but I am at much lower dosage. I wanted to tell you that I am here for you.. I will be checking in of you need help. You are not alone!!! Hang in there, think about all the nasty lies and s...t and just do it. Thinking about the bad stuff helps me not to relapse.. You need to be there for your son.. You made it through cancer, you will make it through this!!!
Try not to be affraid of the detox instead except the fact that its coming regardless of how long you wait or hold it off. Get informed with as much information as possible about what is going to happen and how to best deal with it. Some things you read will work and some won't. When you feel your worse then reach out to us for support. The more cheer leaders you have on your side the better you will feel and the harder you'll try to win.
Your scared because you know its going to be hard and you've failed in the past. Take your past experience and change where you went wrong. Eliminate or try to adjust the factors that caused you to relaspe. Eliminate all of your options for getting the drug before withdrawl cause belive me when I say, if given the option to get rid of or subside the withdrawl, you will most likely relapse.
Your scared because you know its going to be hard and you've failed in the past. Take your past experience and change where you went wrong. Eliminate or try to adjust the factors that caused you to relaspe. Eliminate all of your options for getting the drug before withdrawl cause belive me when I say, if given the option to get rid of or subside the withdrawl, you will most likely relapse.
Sharon, the addict part of you wants you to keep using. Some people get cancer and some have the disease of addiction. It just is.
There is no time but the present!
1 is too many and 1000 never enough. There will never be enough pills.
I'm 67 days clean. You can do this girl!
There is no time but the present!
1 is too many and 1000 never enough. There will never be enough pills.
I'm 67 days clean. You can do this girl!
COMMUNITY LEADER
Dont fear the wd's, fear what will happen if you dont stop. It will be okay and you will get thru this. We are here for you~~~sara
HI Sharon.....60 is not to much to come off from in fact its pritty modest as fare as habits go in this forum .....not to say it will be a cake walk but in about 4 or 5 days you will start to see the light it wood be good if you could share this with the hubby ...are secrets keep us sick....and im sure he will help support you threw all of this.....it will be great having everybody clean and sober for the holidays so dont take your eyes off the prize will all be here to walk you threw this just remember you wont be chained to a bottle once this is said and done your going to need to tall your family sooner or later this requires aftercare to help stay clean getting clean is the ez part so im a little confused have you started all ready or not?? any way I will check on you now and then to see how your doing I keep some strange hours so if you up late we might run into each other good luck and God bless......Gnarly
It seems you have got all the stuff... i would not take the tyrosine for the first days, you will be enough jittery and nervous to take it. Start with it when you are past the first 4/5 days... Don't have fear, you know you did it and you can do it now... Good luck today :)
i read your post and i know you are scared, i know i was but its worth it i promise it is, i'll say a prayer for you and good luck today , let us know how you are doing your a strong person i know you can do this :)
well here I am day 1 I woke at 7am sweating and aching didn't take a dose took the Valium and was able to lay in bed until about an hour ago. I'm sweaty and have cramps, don't want to take the Immodium yet I've been so costipated I want some of the toxins out. I wanted to check back yesterday but couldn't because of family. Anyone done the Thomas Recipe here? I'm waiting for someone to come pick up my pills if they don't show soon I'm going to have to flush them. I don't feel as determined as I was last month. I am praying and hated the prison the pills create anyone, please help I can't do this alone and I can't tell my family right now.
Anyoneo here who done the thomas recipe? I'm not sure what to take or how much.
I got on my knees and asked God for help I don't feel strong enough right now. I read all the posts that said this is the best time to take your last dose. My addiction wants me to wait until December and by then I could loose my family and my job.
I feel so needy and alone it is hard to post my husband is home he thinks I have the flu and he is not very good or supportive when I;m sick.
Anyone who has time to go over my list please help me figure out what to take when.
I got on my knees and asked God for help I don't feel strong enough right now. I read all the posts that said this is the best time to take your last dose. My addiction wants me to wait until December and by then I could loose my family and my job.
I feel so needy and alone it is hard to post my husband is home he thinks I have the flu and he is not very good or supportive when I;m sick.
Anyone who has time to go over my list please help me figure out what to take when.
can't keep begging for support too painful day 1 and a minute seems like and hour. I will check back later and hope to finds some hope from someone here today.and maybe some answers to my question and those of you who have emailed me you saved me from using an hour ago. please i feel so alone I want to make it through the next four days and not take and oxycodone. God help me fing the determination and courage,
HI Sharon ......YOU CAN DO THIS .....it ant no fun but if you do a few things it will help try to maintain a positive attitude wile doing this this is a win win you will feel better and you wont be chained to a pill bottle when its done
I tell everybody ....'''you just got to be ok without being ok for a wile'' this to shall pass....remember to force the fluids gatoraid is good it has electrolytes in it remember this is all temporary in a few days you willl feel better and dont under estimate a good hot soak it will releave most of the symptoms if you can get out and rent some movies your probablly not going to sleep for a few days it will give you something to do wile up ....I found rolling up on the couch with some soft music playing with my eyes closed ws as close to sleep as I was going to get it at least gives you some form of rest and pray with all your herat Jesus heres those that call out his name at 3am he is all you got and all you need I will try to get back to you I work for the newspaper and havent slept since wen night so my batterys are low but I should be up till 6 AZ time hang in there and what ever you do dont give up....did I tell you you could do this......good luck may God be with you.......Gnarly
I tell everybody ....'''you just got to be ok without being ok for a wile'' this to shall pass....remember to force the fluids gatoraid is good it has electrolytes in it remember this is all temporary in a few days you willl feel better and dont under estimate a good hot soak it will releave most of the symptoms if you can get out and rent some movies your probablly not going to sleep for a few days it will give you something to do wile up ....I found rolling up on the couch with some soft music playing with my eyes closed ws as close to sleep as I was going to get it at least gives you some form of rest and pray with all your herat Jesus heres those that call out his name at 3am he is all you got and all you need I will try to get back to you I work for the newspaper and havent slept since wen night so my batterys are low but I should be up till 6 AZ time hang in there and what ever you do dont give up....did I tell you you could do this......good luck may God be with you.......Gnarly
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