I'm having a craving!!! A bad one!

[ang_811]

Hey everybody... I'm having a bad cravng!!! I can't seem to get the pills out of my mind! That's all I'm thinking about! I've done eveything on my list I made for myself fr when I do get cravings and when I get done it still comes back! I can't seem t shake it!!!!! It's annoyng! I hate postng this but I'm putting pride to the side and my recovery to no 1!  I think what brought it on is that today's my bday and I can't remeber th last tine I had a sober bday. I was always gven free pills and free drinks! Tonght I'm going out with people from work and be sober while everyone else makes fools of theirselves! It'll be a different experience for me but I can do it! I won't go If I am still having this craving!!!!

[laurel453]

you know something ? when we are in an emergency, we don't have to know all the reasons why we are stuck in that situation as long as we know what we have to do to overcome the emergency....

you could still be looking for an answer for a long time and meanwhile you can just stop harming yourself. what i mean is that you know that going out is harming you, stop going out, no questions, no thinking about, stop doing this... ....this is what you can do, don't say you can't.... ang, you can....and keep working looking for the answers but please, not harming yourself any more is your emergency now....

[IBKleen]

Like everyone said, you know the answers. We can't get clean for you, we can only support you. When you are ready we will be here. I pray that you make it.

[ang_811]

I know. This is hard 2 type this but I used last night. My inhibitions were dropped and I gave in. Don't know y I'm doing this to myself. I think I'm only running away from my problems but by going out I'm making my problems worst.

[laurel453]

you don't want to stop going out but you wish you don't want it....you can stop but you don't want.

you are the only one who can want this, ang :) the only one....what are you afraid of if you don't go out ? losing those friends ?  not having fun for the rest of your life ? you can conquer those thoughts, you can :)

[dominosarah]

I am sorry you are struggling so bad ang.  The answers are right in front of you but you have to be the one to reach out.  Nothing good is going to come from this and i just hope and pray you make it out of this mess.   I dont really know what to tell you anymore as you have made up your mind that this is what you want to do.  I just wish you understood how serious this is as your life is on the line~~~~~~~~sara

[ang_811]

I can't seem to stop going out! Last night I screwed up. Everytime I go out I knoW how bad I'm gonna feel the next day but I can't seem to stop. I feel absolutely horrible about verything last night! I wish I could stop wanting to go out and party but I don't want to. I really wish I was there.