Kicking a Terrible Habit...Need Help

[SmokeyMcDude]

   I smoked my last balloon at 4A.M. last night. I was doing about 3 a day for 5 months. I saw a doctor today and unfortunately, she was not very sympathetic to my situation. (I do live in Utah and most citizens, let alone MD's are Mormon so I wasn't expecting much of anything.) I have all the workings for the Thomas Recipe, Librium and 1 Xanax pill (from earlier scripts), Mineral Suppliments, Fish Oil, L-Tyrosine, B-6 and even some Melatonin to help me sleep. (which I doubt I will) I am feeling totally and utterly drained and my entire body aches, I have another balloon but I really don't want to get into it. I am literally inches away from the toilet trying to drop it in.
   Anyway, I was never an addict of anything before I had hand surgery about 7 months ago. I would describe myself as having a hippie mentallity (weed, beer, LSD and mushrooms are all ok) but when I got a Vallium script I was introduced to a world I'd never experienced before (and wish I hadn't) Needless to say the Vallium didn't last long and heroin is becoming ever popular in my state and also easier to get a hold of. For 10$ a balloon I thought I could spend everyday getting peeled back with no problem. WRONG! I felt like I was slowly slipping away and I couldn't get a grip on my life anymore, I haven't lost my job (yet) and just want to get back to my old life-loving self. I have lined up many trips and festivals this summer and don't want to be dependent on smack to have fun at Telluride. (which is more fun that this brown **** anyway.)
Basically I have some questions:
-Does booze help the withdrawal symptoms? I never had a problem with alcohol as I have a very sensitive stomach but would a couple of beers calm me down? I would think that and Librium would be a recipe for sleep but I don't want to over do it.
-Also does weed help at all? I have a nice bong and a satchel to burn through but I don't want to exacerbate my symptoms.
-When should I take my Xanax? After 2 days or on the 2nd day? Basically when is going to be the worst because it's really bad right now and I don't know how it could get worse.
Any secrets that the Thomas recipe hasn't told me would be greatly appreciated, I'm getting really down on myself and considered shooting a lethal dose rather than going through this hell on more than one occasion. Any help would be appreciated.

[Gobig]

I had to wait a week b4 I went to a sub Dr., so my normal Dr. gave me methadone pills, I had to wait 48 hours b4 starting the sub.  Went very smoothly.  You're not trading addictions as long as you're on sub to detox - sub maintenance is another story - not the story you want.

[Gobig]

Good deal - you're on the right track.  

[SmokeyMcDude]

This is really tough, I have an appointment with a detox center but that's on Monday and I don't think I'll need it by then. I also have an appointment with a doctor licensed to prescribe suboxone on the 25th but like I said, I'd rather go through it now for a  week than trade addictions. We'll see what they recommend, probably meetings or psychiatry visits or something along those lines. We'll see and I'll repost on Monday.

[Gobig]

The easiest part of this whole thing is what you're doing right now - even c/t.

[Gobig]

I went from 24mg to 2mgs to nothing in 6 weeks - started going to meetings when I started the sub.  The w/d was no fun - but nothing near going c/t.  It's an option - and if done right with proper guidance, can be relatively painless.

Good luck!  You going to go to meetings?

[Shotrock]

I'm with you that Sub was devil, I couldn't beat it second time ,1st time 10 days of torture 2nd time couldn't do it. Everbody is different some people swear by it. Hang in there we're pulling for you. Anyway you do it. Get your Life Back!