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Losing my resolve

not sure if i am posting this right. but on my earlier post I mentioned a call  about available vics..... its haunting me - how do I not give in? they were always so hard to get and now here they are practically f'ing gift wrappppppped! 6 days?   will it be this bad again if i give in for just a day or two?
53 Responses
Avatar universal
DO NOT GIVE IN NO MATTER WHAT !!!!   THAT'S YOUR ILLNESS TRYING TO TALK YOU INTO TO USING !!!!!!

Tell this person not to call you about pills. Tell everyone you're clean now. I mean it!!!

Vicki  xo
1213301 tn?1281738653
Hi,
I have been fighting this fight for 84 days.....again.  I was clean for 30 days....and I talked myself into the "What's one or two days?"  It didn't take days.....it took hours and I was swallowing 3-4 at a time.  I figured that I had been clean for 30 days.......a couple would "do the trick."  Not even close.....I swear I needed even more than before.  
I haven't been posting much lately because I felt like I wasn't strong enough or in the position to give advice.  When I read your post I didn't even hesitate to start typing.
DO NOT cave.  You have 6 days in and from my experience I can tell you........the withdrawals the second time around are worse....multiplied and horrible.  You will be back at day 1 before you know and feeling horrible.  
I have been seeing a therapist and I asked her during my last visit "Will I ever be strong enough to REALLY say no?  Will I ever be able to turn them down?"  She told me that just asking that question shows that I am getting a little stronger every day.  You are doing the same thing.  If you really wanted to take them....you would have been on your way to pick them up.....instead you reached out for support.  
YOU CAN DO THIS............IF I CAN....YOU CAN!!!  
617347 tn?1331293081
How you don't give in ?... because it's in your name, because you-can't-do this-any-more, because you are saving your own life and because when you are walking through a desert , you don't walk forward and backward...you just keep walking forward because there is no turning back to the inferno... :)

trust yourself, break the autodestructive cycle you are in forever

this too shall pass !
Avatar universal
Do not give in!!!  I know the same thing where I live they were always so hard to find!!  You know what I did i called the 3 people I get them from and told them i no longer want them way before I knew they got their script!!! So they never called me to tell me of any available.....You can do this!!!   besides think of how much money you will have if you quit becuase I know some people around her charge $5 a piece for the 7.5 and $6-7 for the vic 10's!!!  A ripoff!! but if they know you want them that bad you will pay the price for them!!! so just hang in there and please let them know you are CLEAN!!
271792 tn?1334979657
My last one-or-two turned into ten years. I don't know why you think anything has changed, but it hasn't. You will never have control over them and you will never be cured.

If you keep testing the waters you may not make it back here. That would be very sad...

Avatar universal
well i have managed to resist and intend to continue to do so. you are very encouraging and i thank you but on my life i am not sure i will ever not have the craving.
Avatar universal
day 7.  getting better. cravings suck.
271792 tn?1334979657
Have you considered joining an outside support group? You will be around people who are in recovery or where you are. It will keep you busy and you can make new friends...clean friends.
495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER
I dont consider something that will kill you a gift.  Please check out some type of aftercare.  You will learn the tools you need to live life clean and happy~~~~~~sara
Avatar universal
Yes cravings suck but death ***** a lot more.  keep your resolve and push on thru.  You will be so glad you are done and dont have to do this again.  Best of luck . guv
Avatar universal
okay gonna fight this latest wave of crave. taking my teenage daughter and my dog to the park. excercise right?  thank you for the encouragement. please keep it up as i would not be at day 7 w/o this place and you people.

ibkleen.....going to seek out aftercare and changemy gloom and doom attitude to positivity!
Avatar universal
Hey honey!  You are doing the right thing. Get distracted and expend some energy.  You are through the worst part now, at least physically, now just take care of your mind with some aftercare.  This place is great for support, but you need something else.  It just helps so much.  

Congrats on day 7!  Keep plugging...You can do this!

Hugs!!!

Lea Ann
199177 tn?1490498534
Cant,
great idea walk and exercise is what pulled me threw the fist part of wd .I had not exercised in years by the time I got off the pills I was 30 pnds over weight .So not only did it help me with wds it started me back on the road to living healthier .
Then yes your next step is finding aftercare so you have a support system right there to help when the times get hard .hang in there .
avis
1283286 tn?1312911966
See Cantdoit,,,YOU CAN DO IT!. And tommorrow will be even better. Your gaining ground fast. Tommorrow you will be even stronger :)
1357134 tn?1277304267
Hi- I have a question-- Is it just the cravings you are feeling on day 7, or are you still having W/D symptoms?  I am on day 1.5 and seeing you at 7 is inspiration for me. :) thx
Avatar universal
me? an inspiration? if only you knew how ironic that is. this is HARD. H.A.R.D.!!!! I was loving my vics and I was terrified of wd's and losing my fun but honey- I AM AT DAY 7! Life is GOOD.  I just got back from the park with dog and child and I did it sober. I LOVE ME right now and you are gonna love you too!!  I quit 20 percs/vis 7/750 and 5/500 after 10 years - my Sweet Jesus - the Liberation!  You go Mouse - If I cn do this there is not a question im my mind that you can!  All my postitive thoughts - my heart and sould are with us all.
Avatar universal
i was hoping you would check in on me Dav.  I need you - I need you all. Please read my post above. I am GOING to MAKE it.  
725350 tn?1318680468
On the comment before about having cravings forever:

It doesn't have to be that way. I have not had an urge to use or drink in almost a year now, and I give the credit to the fact that I was willing to jump into AA/NA head first, get a sponsor, work the steps, and work with others. My life is so incredibly better now, it's hard to explain without giving you a life story.

AA seems scary, sometimes looks like a cult, but it is the opposite of that. It is, basically, Medhelp, in person, on steroids lol. A great group of people who teach you how to live clean and fix the mess we have created in our addiction. Look into it, it really does work.

Good Luck!
Avatar universal
when i started my post this morning all i could think of were the cravings.  Mouse,,,,,you need to know that other than low energy my physical issues for the most part have past. I suppose it is different for everyone, yes, for me it is the cravings. they are wreaking havoc with my brain / body / sense of worth - whatever you want to call it. yesterday I might have given in, today, still that possibility, but I am going to do my best not to give in. I do not want to do this again. I do not want to be helpless. I do not want to hurt my children running off to buy vics instead of groceries.  I want to be the wonderful and beautiful person without the vics that i always thought I was with them. it;s hard - there is no other f'ing way to say it but we are talking about my life !  your life! my kids lives!  what on Gods green earth can possibly be more important?  I am gonna keep asking that to myself and praying for the strenght that we all need. Not just for me but for us all.  Peace!
1351082 tn?1479840132
I know what you are going through and you are so early in your recovery but you are recovering. I know it ***** right now God do I know, I never thought in a million yrs I would get to where I am today. I fought two demons Xanax and Vicoprofen..for ten yrs I poisoned my body, mind and soul. I never thought I could make it without them I tried many times and the w/d's about killed me but in the end the drugs were slowly taking there toll on me. It pains me to see you going through this, I feel what your feeling all over again and my heart is aching for you but I know you will do it,  I did it and I never want to feel any of those feelings again I dont think I could live through it again.  But seven days without you are so well on your way, live for each moment...day to day..each minute not using is another minute closer to freedom from this addiction.  Im here for you anytime just let me know I check in all the time, I want to help I had lots of help when I went through this we all need each other..God Bless..Keep Praying God is here for you....Sunshine
1283286 tn?1312911966
Gosh you certainly are fighting a battle with the cravings no doubt. Your doing great though. Makes me think of that new credit score commercial they have out there. The one that has the credit numbers as a fluffy dog thats terrorizing the mom owner chewing up the couch etc. And as the "numbers" went up, the pesky little fluffy s**t turned into the sweetest, non destructive tail wagging, ball dropping best friend..

Well, I thought its a cute analogy. Hope you have a great weekend Cantdoit..Think food..What's delicious that you haven't eaten in awhile? Then go for it..I am :)
Avatar universal
I just realized that I had not responded directly to you and you deserve my attention as you "didn't hesitate to type" to me. THANK YOU. I have no support system and believe with every ouce of my being that this forum will and is saving my life.  I need this as much as i need oxegyn at this moment and your post has lifted me.  you are worthy. more worthy than i know you will ever give yourself credit for. this is coming from me - someone who lost her self worth to pills long ago. I am not a religious - spiritual woman and I know that at this moment GOD is with me. Whoal. where the hell did that come from?  somewhere deep deep inside that is helping me to get through this has to be a higher power.  GOD be with us all.
Avatar universal
are you peeking? how did you know I was a furry little number?
Avatar universal
knowing that you are here for me.....reading the sincerity of your words....you inspire me. thank you from the bottom of my heart.  YOU DID IT!  I can too!  Stay with me and please pray for SAD. I am getting the feeling she is not that strong, just like me.
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