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Avatar universal

scared to death...

I'm so scared right now... I've messed up really bad! I've called in my own scripts and this time they cancelled it and didn't fill it. I know they will be calling the Dr tomorrow and it will all be over! What will happen to me? What might they do? I'm the mother of a 17month old precious baby boy and he deserves so much more than this! I feel like if I just end it all then it will save him and my family a lot of trauma!
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Avatar universal
Try to stay calm. Ending it all, is not the answer and you know that. I am not sure what will happen, but maybe this is the bottom you needed to stop using. I really am sorry this has happened to you, until tomorrow you won't know for sure right?  

If you show them you are serious about getting clean and get some help, then that will help a lot. Many of us here hit bottoms, I was on a death wish my last few months of using, but life has changed now and things do get better. Keep us updated on what happens ok. It's never to late to fix our mistakes:)
Helpful - 0
1303537 tn?1317800741
U are gonna have to tell him, he will be wondering why the cops are showing up, tell him
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Avatar universal
Its been going on since Jan. He actually called in some and gave me written rxs back when I worked there, but after I lost my job I just started calling them in... Normally it would go through no prob. But today I called it in, it was filled, and then cancelled. When I called the pharmacy said there must have been a mistake because they didn't have anything called in for me. But it was, so either they already knew, or they are going to call to verify tomorrow morning.
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1303537 tn?1317800741
That is weird....hopefully they made some sort of mistake...i pray nothing bad happens to you
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Avatar universal
I recently got off Fentanyl and my husband was soo not supportive.  He thought I was crazy because I have legit pain issues and he did not want to hear me complain about my back (nice huh?)  Well, I sat him down a while ago and explained how it made me feel, why I wanted off, what type of person it make me, etc.  and he finally got it.  I can not tell you your husband will get it, but it is worth a try.  Right now tho, you need to concentrate of getting yourself well and taking care of your precious child.  
I am so sorry to hear about the rest of the chaos going on in your life.   I am sure that does not help.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
He is already in bed for the night... so I guess I will tell him tomorrow. I know I should want to be here for my son, but what kind of mother am I? He deserves so much better that the life Im giving him. If I'm not here, they can all move on, we cant afford to get me bailed out of jail or pay for court costs...

Ive had these thoughts for a long time, but now it seems the right thing to do. Im not saying Id do it tonight, but its deffinatley a thought that isn't leaving my mind right now.
Helpful - 0
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