Help Stopping Suboxone

[cleangimnow]

All,

Here I am again...been on suboxone for two years now at 6-8 mg a day. I do drink and take my script of Klonopin.  The klon is daily and drinking once or twice a week. I need help. I don't know what to do. Most people see me as this highly functional responsible person.  Married, kid, nice home, fancy job title, etc.  

I feel like its all a lie.  I'm just a loser inside who can't get it together. Suboxone is a powerful opiate that I am and I make a lot of important decisions.  Granted, I'm happy that I'm not chasing pills and having mood swings. However, I need help getting clean. My wife doesn't know about the sub because she would be so disappointed. I got back on it when I did bc I was chasing pills again at the time.

Please help!!!

[cleangimnow]

Btw-  I exercise 6 days a week. Lift 4, play raquetball 1, and walk 4 miles 1 day. Also coach soccer.

[cleangimnow]

I tried Wellbutrin last time I kicked sub. It made me feel crazy. Should I quit my job and go to rehab?  I don't want to. I'm finally successful in my career. I'm earning 6 figures and keeping up with the jones.

[cleangimnow]

I get my subs from a dr. I am greatful for that. Sub allows me to live a relatively normal live. I agree. I should stop the alcohol. I started drinking tonight after a crappy day. Man life can suck. My staffs are driving me nuts. Nonstop all day.

My therapist had to cancel today. She was sick. Man that *****. I just got up the nerve. What is wrong with me?  Why am I drinking tonight?

[Jinx_777]

while you are at the therapist, talk about maybe something for depression.  wellbutrin is supposed to help with depression and lowers cravings, etc.

you are NOT a loser.  addiction does NOT discriminate.  it happens to the best of us.  the fact you recognize it and want to do something about it  is very admirable.  

if your sub doctor will not help you with a taper try reading some old posts and you will find taper info.   are you getting the sub's from a doctor???  either way you really need a doctor who wants to help you get off of them.

i have to agree with the 'stop drinking' comments.  your brain is going to want to cross addict and while it is screaming for opiates drinking will lower your resolve.  best to avoid it.

[atthebeach]

Your desire to be clean and sober is there. You can live a life free from the chains and bondage of addiction. You will need support. Good  step going to a therapist.
What is the prescribed dosage of subs? You said you take 6-8mgs.
Sub tapers are slow and steady.
You should try to cut out the drinking first. If its only one or two days a week. Alcohol is a depressant. It makes you feel good the night of and the. The depression follows.
Do you have an exercise regiment?

Learning to live life on its terms. Rolling with the punches. Managing stress, triggers are all things you need to internalize to maintain sobriety.
You brain chemistry has changed from your use. It can heal. It will take time.
Please make a resolve to yourself that now you are going forward to indeed to live that life.
Get as much support as possible, na/aa, celebrate recovery, therapists, church, exercise, positive influences, healthy diet.

You are young. You have many years to live a clean and sober life.
Dig deep my friend, you are stronger than you think.
Sending encouragement and prayers,
Keep the faith,
There is always hope,
Debbie

[cleangimnow]

I am acting like a little baby. I'm finally going to a therapist today so that I'm not just taking my sub and powering through life. I keep thinking that if I save even more money, I'll be able to walk away from my stress, buy a small home in cash and be able to take some time for myself. My wife wants to have another kid. Will I physically be able to and am I ready for that?  I feel like a crappy person. My kid loves me and thinks the world of me. I've been stable over the last couple years for her. Honestly, my wife has been more I a basket case with her crazy job. Ironically, money isn't an issue. So, at least I'm not ditching subs for other stuff. I really don't want to go back to that lifestyle. I just want to figure out a way to taper slowly and then endure the really ****** month and months to follow. Advise ???